over thinking everything

KlassyWithaK · June 2010

At the beginning of planning I thought my FI and I had some great ideas for everything. After looking at other people's bios (mainly yours) and websites I'm starting to rethink everything. Everyone on here seems to have everything so well thought out.I still don't feel like we have a style or theme and everything won't look cohesive on the day of.
I want the ceremony to be a romantic garden party theme. Other than lantern centerpieces I really can't think of anything else I want for the reception. I want the over all feel to be vintage. But nothing I like so far really seems vintage at all.
Am I just having a case of analysis paralysis? When I look at other people's pics, I think "I like that but don't know how I would do that" or think we can't afford it. Can someone look at my bio and give me more suggestions on what to do?
Bless you if you got through all that!

graysquirrel · June 2010

I love the look of the house!!!! I wish I could transport it for a day to MN

You could do so much vintage stuff with that house. Looking at the picture and your post, I immediately thought of Gosford Park and Agatha Christie novels set in the 1920s. Do you want to go more vintage or do you just need more ideas? For what my opinion is worth, I'd carry the heavier themeing into your reception since it is at a golf course. People will feel the theme at the house, but maybe not as much in the banquet room, if that makes sense. It will be more important to have your special theme touches at the tables, I'm thinking. I think that the best step for you may be to do some research on which decade you'd want to emulate. Then giving you advice might be easier. Hope this helped even a little.

llamallamaduck · June 2010

Woah there girl. You have achieved soooo much in your planning already, and you're fretting about not having a cohesive theme. Please dont think me rude, but that is a bit silly. You have almost a year to sort everything out, you seem spectacularly organised and you fiance doesnt appear to become a quivering heap at the mention of the word "theme". f things are stressing you, delegate. That's what bridesmaids are for. And if all else fails, ebay sells fairie dust

Just to offer a little perspective on this, I'm hoping to get married this October/November. However, because I'm a UK citizen and wanting to marry my American fiance in the US and live there, I need a fiance visa. Which means I have to marry within 90 days of entering the country on that visa. We haven't even started the application process, because we're waiting until I'm in the country on a different visa to work at camp (ok, so that wait isnt long now as I fly out on Wednesday) so we can actually go together to speak with an immigration lawyer to make sure we do everything correctly. Planning a wedding AND emmigrating is stressful enough, but I'm also the single most organisationally-challenged person in the world. But I trust that everything will come together in the end. Perhaps you need a little bit of that trust in your abilities too.

alexchristine2011 · June 2010

I'm right there with ya! It's hard to plan a bajillion things, but not see everything tie in together until the day of. I just try to remind myself not to get carried away with little things. People aren't going to remember what the invites looked like, or how the table numbers looked, but they will remember the moments where you exchange vows, and your first dance, etc. I'm sure everything you do/plan will look fantastic!

Enjoy wedding planning!

KlassyWithaK · June 2010

Thanks girls! It sounds weird but I need people to tell me to breathe and put things in perspective, so I don't think its rude at all. I'm a huge analyzer and get obsessive about details. Which helps for some things but not so much for weddings.

I can't imagine dealing with wedding planning and moving and meeting immigration requirements! Sounds like you girls are on top of things though.

ledalia · June 2010

KlassywithaK - My advice to you is relax and don't worry so much about it. You have about eleven months to go. I can't tell you how many times I've changed so many details to the point where I almost wished I hadn't started planning as early as I did. Your tastes will evolve in the next year and you will probably change or nix a lot of the ideas you have now. Research but don't settle for anything just yet.

llamallamaduck - My stepfather is British and he and my mom have gone through the immigration process three times now. He moved here, she moved there, and finally they both moved back here a few months ago. Luckily my mom has dual citizenship now. It is so much more difficult to move to the US and I know what a frustrating, time consuming, and expensive process it is!

Just Jen · June 2010

Honestly, for me, I think just a few touches here and there are what make the theme, without overdoing. In my case, I felt there were a few key things that gave our wedding a vintage-y feel:

• our venue was originally an old house -- big porch, big columns, etc.
* we used our silhouettes as our "logo" and hired the silhouette artist to cut our guests' silhouettes at the wedding
* we rented a 1940s black Cadillac to transport us.
* My "look" -- mostly the birdcage veil and the somewhat '40s-glamour styling (red lips, drop earrings, etc.)
* Groom and GM in basic black Cary Grant-esque tuxes
• our centerpieces were old lanterns and candles -- no flowers
* our card box looked like a small old suitcase with weird heiroglyphics on it. Not really '40s or anything, but it felt "old"
* our DIY invitations looked ... um ... old-timey-ish?

And that's really it. So we're talking, like, what? 8 things? Out of the MILLION decisions you make over the course of wedding planning? I think you just need a few things here and there, and you'll get the feel you want.

And you have PLENTY of time.

Good luck.

so_smitten · June 2010

I think that sometimes looking at bios/blogs/wedding mags can be counterproductive. We only had a short time to plan but at some point I remember being terrified that things wouldn't "gel" and it would look like a mish mosh of stuff. I had to step away from all of visual over stimulation and focus on what I was doing. Maybe take a month as "wedding free" and then come back with fresh eyes a little bit of perspective. It looks like you have a great start. I'm sure things will come together beautifully.

snoangel79 · June 2010

Klassy,

You have an amazing ceremony reception venue already, I have a somewhat similar theme. You do have plenty of time too! I started planning in January after I got engaged (so I had about 8 months). You are already ahead of me in that respect. Do your big items first (photographer, flowers etc) book those vendors. The little details will come into place as you develop everything (Etsy is awesome, at least I've found a ton there for our wedding!) You can do it don't worry

jlmeier5 · June 2010

WOW! i swear i know you Kassy! I have seen you and your FI before i know it!

KlassyWithaK · June 2010

In Response to <a href="http://forums.theknot.com/Sites/theknot/Pages/Main.aspx/wedding-theme-boards_retro-vintage-weddings_over-thinking-everything?plckFindPostKey=Cat:Wedding%20Theme%20BoardsForum:667Discussion:2b9a3f2b-674e-486a-8809-f325b2067b4aPost:e07b8f23-ea93-47ee-a94c-f1ea1078c42f">Re: over thinking everything</a>:
[QUOTE]WOW! i swear i know you Kassy! I have seen you and your FI before i know it!
Posted by jlmeier5[/QUOTE]

Weird! What part of Iowa are you from? Ever live in Nebraska? My FI and I are both originally from Nebraska, but he moved before we got together. The only time we were in NE at the same time was over winter and summer breaks.
I can't think of where I would know you from, but occasionally I'll have people randomly contact me that I don't remember.

over thinking everything

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