Just a thought.

KatSantiago526 · August 2012

Hey,

I just have a question: My hubby-to-be is Puerto Rican and I've been thinking about possible venues. I've gone from Backyard to Beach and now I'm wondering if a church wedding would be appropriate. I understand that a lot of PR families are Catholic but I'm not too sure about his. He has a strong faith but I wouldn't call him very religious. In fact, I'm not even sure if he's a practicing Catholic. If his family were to pick a church, what could I expect for the ceremony? If we don't pick a church, is there any specific religious practices we could incorporate? Just a quick fact: I myself am African-American/Afro-Jamaican and haven't claimed a religion yet. My family is also not very religious. Any help would be appreciated. Thanks.

Avion22 · August 2012

This is something that you and your fiance need to sit down and talk about. Not only about what kind of wedding ceremony you want to have, but what role faith and religion will play in your family.

My guess is that if he was a practicing Catholic, you would know about it, because he'd be going to mass every week. If he is a baptized and confirmed Catholic but not practicing, then he may want a Catholic ceremony. You wouldn't have to convert to Catholicism as long as you both decided to raise any children as Catholics. This may or may not be something that is important ot him and to his family.

I'm not big on having a religious ceremony unless religion plays a big role in at least one person's life, and the couple intends to keep that religion as a big part in their lives. Otherwise, it seems kind of hypocritical to me.

Like I said, only HE can tell you what is important to him, and only the two of you can decide how you want to get married.

KatSantiago526 · August 2012

In Response to <a href="http://forums.theknot.com/Sites/theknot/Pages/Main.aspx/wedding-boards_customs-traditions_help-from-any-puerto-rican-brides?plckFindPostKey=Cat:Wedding BoardsForum:36Discussion:35da8677-9c4a-4cc3-b335-6b28b5939854Post:bedc2415-af40-4fb5-a57f-04a48e82146d">Re: Help from any Puerto Rican Brides</a>:
[QUOTE]This is something that you and your fiance need to sit down and talk about. Not only about what kind of wedding ceremony you want to have, but what role faith and religion will play in your family. My guess is that if he was a practicing Catholic, you would know about it, because he'd be going to mass every week. If he is a baptized and confirmed Catholic but not practicing, then he may want a Catholic ceremony. You wouldn't have to convert to Catholicism as long as you both decided to raise any children as Catholics. This may or may not be something that is important ot him and to his family. I'm not big on having a religious ceremony unless religion plays a big role in at least one person's life, and the couple intends to keep that religion as a big part in their lives. Otherwise, it seems kind of hypocritical to me. Like I said, only HE can tell you what is important to him, and only the two of you can decide how you want to get married.
Posted by Avion22[/QUOTE]

Thanks! I'll be sure to have that talk.

StephBeanWed61502 · August 2012

I'm a little confused on how you could be engaged to someone and not know anything about their religious practices/preferences. That's a pretty central issue to marriage (not saying you have to have or not have any particular faith, but it can be a major source of conflict when partners don't share the same beliefs). You definitely need to talk to him about this.

Also, this really has nothing to do with him being Puerto Rican and everything to do with his personal, individual preferences. My FI is Puerto Rican and could care less about religious stuff. His cousin (also Puerto Rican) did the full Catholic mass for his wedding. It's about personal preference/belief, not what "a lot of PR families" do or don't believe or do.

KatSantiago526 · August 2012

In Response to <a href="http://forums.theknot.com/Sites/theknot/Pages/Main.aspx/wedding-boards_customs-traditions_help-from-any-puerto-rican-brides?plckFindPostKey=Cat:Wedding BoardsForum:36Discussion:35da8677-9c4a-4cc3-b335-6b28b5939854Post:86d5d724-2ad5-42f4-af4f-93a0a5faeef0">Re: Help from any Puerto Rican Brides</a>:
[QUOTE]I'm a little confused on how you could be engaged to someone and not know anything about their religious practices/preferences. That's a pretty central issue to marriage (not saying you have to have or not have any particular faith, but it can be a major source of conflict when partners don't share the same beliefs). You definitely need to talk to him about this. Also, this really has nothing to do with him being Puerto Rican and everything to do with his personal, individual preferences. My FI is Puerto Rican and could care less about religious stuff. His cousin (also Puerto Rican) did the full Catholic mass for his wedding. It's about personal preference/belief, not what "a lot of PR families" do or don't believe or do.
Posted by StephBeanWed61502[/QUOTE]

You're absolutely right. I guess I'm in the wrong for creating this post.

Peledreamsofrain · August 2012

This is a very strange question to pose to strangers in favor of your own future family and fiance.

They are sure to have their own customs, traditions, and expectations that you will want to know about if you want to become a member of their family. Having a family that spans two countries creates a unique cultural blend.

cbbgtownlovers · August 2012

I'd agree that you should probably be sure of your FI religious stance before you get married. It is very odd to me that you can't say for sure whether or not he is an actual practicing Catholic. Do you not know whether or not he goes to mass? This is definitely something you need to talk with him about. The role of religion and spirituality plays will be important not just for your ceremony but also for the rest of your lives togehter.

OwningAHome1981 · September 2012

In Response to <a href="http://forums.theknot.com/Sites/theknot/Pages/Main.aspx/wedding-boards_customs-traditions_help-from-any-puerto-rican-brides?plckFindPostKey=Cat:Wedding BoardsForum:36Discussion:35da8677-9c4a-4cc3-b335-6b28b5939854Post:86d5d724-2ad5-42f4-af4f-93a0a5faeef0">Re: Help from any Puerto Rican Brides</a>:
[QUOTE]<strong>I'm a little confused on how you could be engaged to someone and not know anything about their religious practices/preferences.</strong> That's a pretty central issue to marriage (not saying you have to have or not have any particular faith, but it can be a major source of conflict when partners don't share the same beliefs). You definitely need to talk to him about this. Also, this really has nothing to do with him being Puerto Rican and everything to do with his personal, individual preferences. My FI is Puerto Rican and could care less about religious stuff. His cousin (also Puerto Rican) did the full Catholic mass for his wedding. It's about personal preference/belief, not what "a lot of PR families" do or don't believe or do.
Posted by StephBeanWed61502[/QUOTE]

I was thinking the same thing...

Just a thought.

Re: Just a thought.

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