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Vent: ILs and travel problems

temurlangtemurlang member
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in South Asian Weddings
My ILs are in NYC right now.  They want us to visit there, but there are two problems.  The main thing is that they were originally going to stay in a 1 BR, but then changed their minds because they found out about Jackson Heights.  It was a last minute thing and now they're in a studio and complaining how cramped the two of them are.

They aren't visiting us because we don't have a house.  Instead, they are going to Arizona to stay with my friend's parents (who do have a house), and we're supposed to join them there.

DH decided that he'll go on his own to NY, since it will be so crowded and we're already paying for 4 tickets to AZ.  MIL objects strongly because she doesn't think I should stay on my own.  I can feel DH caving... and I see no point in paying for me to go when everyone will just feel cramped.

In addition, before marriage I agreed to go to India every other year, which I think is plenty.  Since we went for the wedding, 2012 would be our next trip.  SIL has very nearly said yes to getting married, which will probably be in March.  That's another major expense for us coming up, which makes me more disinclined to travel around the US this summer.  DH also announced that we have to go to India again in 2013 for his HS reunion.  Ugh.  Every trip is going to be expensive and exhausting.  SIL's wedding will mean traveling to 3 towns.

Don't get me wrong... I like going to India...  I just also like going to other, new places and/or actually seeing things, which I know I won't on those two trips.
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Re: Vent: ILs and travel problems

  • raangoliraangoli
    Combo Breaker First Comment
    edited December 2011
    This sounds like a cluster... waiting to happen. How long is DH going to visit them in NYC for? I agree with you that if you're going to see them in AZ in a few weeks time, then you should just stick to that plan.

    Can you say that you'd rather stick close to home for a bit since your dad just had surgery and you're still helping him and your brother with certain things? Do you think that would fly?

    On a semi-related note - that's great that your SIL is very close to becoming engaged! Phew!
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  • temurlangtemurlang member
    Combo Breaker First Comment First Anniversary
    edited December 2011
    Good idea... I already used "how can I leave Dear Old Dad at a time like this?" on my MOH and MIL might go for it too.  And he really does need help since he can't see out of one eye and my brother is useless.

    I don't know how long DH plans on being there.  He's already taking time off for our honeymoon in October, and a couple of days for Arizona despite being really busy at work, so it can't be a long trip.  On the other hand, it's not really possible for us to go to the East Coast for a weekend so it would be at least 5 days.

    And yes, SIL has asked the guy to purchase a car and a new flat, and he seems to be complying.  My ILs are planning to stop in Mumbai on their way back to meet his father... *fingers crossed* we're almost there!
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  • SonaliPopSonaliPop member
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    edited December 2011
    I think it's great for her to get married...let someone else look after her, and let her learn what it's like to be responsible.
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