No Honeymoon, Honey.

sierraberry32 · August 2012

My man wants to plan a honeymoon, and was really hurting himself over the fact that he would have to work double his hours to afford it, but I said don't worry about it! We don't have much money, and I want to save as much as possible to move into a place together!

When I told him what I had in mind, he seemed really sad, so I asked what he had in mind for a honeymoon and he started to act like a little kid with a big imagination saying that he wanted to take a trip outside of America, and wanted to stay in five star hotels and rent a nice car and other luxury like stuff... I kinda laughed a bit...

Now I am suffering with his evil glare for mocking his dream Honeymoon idea.

sierraberry32 · August 2012

In Response to <a href="http://forums.theknot.com/Sites/theknot/Pages/Main.aspx/wedding-boards_honeymoon_no-honeymoon-honey?plckFindPostKey=Cat:Wedding%20BoardsForum:11Discussion:d40e9c81-924e-494b-903c-1ec9ccd20650Post:cc0523c7-cdff-421e-bdb5-4066881003de">Re: No Honeymoon, Honey.</a>:
[QUOTE]I'd apologize for laughing and nudge him in the direction of turning this dream honeymoon fantasy into a 5 or 10 year anniversary reality. FWIW, I can see why he may be hurt you laughed,
Posted by ILoveMilkDuds[/QUOTE]

I know it was totally uncalled for... But I couldnt help it!

acaponi87 · August 2012

In Response to <a href="http://forums.theknot.com/Sites/theknot/Pages/Main.aspx/wedding-boards_honeymoon_no-honeymoon-honey?plckFindPostKey=Cat:Wedding%20BoardsForum:11Discussion:d40e9c81-924e-494b-903c-1ec9ccd20650Post:c74a9f96-37c2-47df-b890-d5509bbd85f8">Re: No Honeymoon, Honey.</a>:
[QUOTE]In Response to Re: No Honeymoon, Honey. : I know it was totally uncalled for... But I couldnt help it!
Posted by sierraberry32[/QUOTE]

Yeah but guys get all sensative especially when it comes to money and when they are trying to be romantic. Ditto the trying to plan it as a anniversary trip later.

ChristineNB · August 2012

Why don't you and him work together to set up a honeymoon budget. Perhaps he could work 1 or 2 doubles a week to have extra money, but not everyday so he doesn't completely wear himself out.

monkeysip · August 2012

If it is at all in your budget, I would try to work out some kind of mini-moon plan.

Maybe stay just one night in a nice 5-star hotel somewhere nearby. Or maybe go away for just a couple days on a short trip. That way he can get a little bit of the fun and fantasy of running away for a honeymoon, but neither one of you have to overwork yourselves or bust the budget.

Of course, if that's really not possible, there's nothing wrong with not having a honeymoon at all. Like PPs said, just plan this trip for a big anniversary.

cwaggoner07 · August 2012

Yes to a minimoon! Maybe a weekend at a Bed and Breakfast nearby! Ask girls on your local board for local getaways!

Summer2011Bride · August 2012

I do get why he was hurt, but I also understand that his idea is just not practical right now. I'd apologize for laughing and then sit down and make a plan to take that dream trip in 5 or 10 years together. That'll show him that you do take it seriously and want to do it, just not right now.

No honeymoon is perfectly fine, or like others have mentioned, take a minimoon in your own town or a town nearby, just to get away for a couple days after the wedding.

ETA: Where in Northern Cali are you? We just vacationed there (SF, Napa, Carmel, Big Sur area) and there are tons of cute inns or towns that you could escape to, depending on where you're located.

Future Mrs Roady · August 2012

We had a similar discussion, with original hopes of going to Jamaica for a week, but after reviewing our finances we decided on doing Jamaica for our one year, and doing a domestic honeymoon for a few days to somewhere that is either a shorter flight, or a drive away. We haven't nailed it down and are still tossing out ideas, but maybe suggest someting like that and see what he says?

Polinar · August 2012

My FI is sensitive about money and being able to afford things. We have enough, and have no debt, but like OP said, he's like a kid with his imagination running wild.
He and I didn't really talk about it at any length, but I suggested doing our honeymoon in 6 months to a year - this just made more sense as we'd be able to save up a little after the wedding (we're paying for the wedding ourselves) and he was totally cool with that plan

GoodLuckBear14 · August 2012

There is nothing that says you have to go on your HM right after the wedding. DH and I spent a couple of days in Atlantic City after the wedding and then took some of the money we got as gifts, added to it a bit at a time and took a great HM in Ireland complete with great restaurants and incredible lodging. I've been there before and knew I could be happy staying at B&Bs and eating in pubs. I'm really glad though that DH insisted on the really nice lodging (you couldn't even call them hotels - one was a Dowager Duchess' Manor House) and eating at incredible restaurants.

Matty143 · August 2012

Ditto Duds and Acaponi.
Also, you have over a year. That's plenty of time to get a little something together for a night of two.
We spent our HM in Napa, San Francisco and Pebble Beach, I know you have lots of options.
Good luck!

Santorini2011 · August 2012

All of above plus...do not mock him. Trust me! Men want to feel like they can provide for their family. There are so many sites where you can get a great deal for a honeymoon. I found a week in Bahamas at a great resort for $1000 from PHL. You could prob find a cruise or deal to Hawaii from N.CA. Do your research and save your money but def take a trip or 1-night getaway. It is worth going somewhere in my opinion. What's a $1k in the grand scheme??? Give him a realistic budget and let him figure it out.

Lisa50 · August 2012

In Response to <a href="http://forums.theknot.com/Sites/theknot/Pages/Main.aspx/wedding-boards_honeymoon_no-honeymoon-honey?plckFindPostKey=Cat:Wedding BoardsForum:11Discussion:d40e9c81-924e-494b-903c-1ec9ccd20650Post:cc0523c7-cdff-421e-bdb5-4066881003de">Re: No Honeymoon, Honey.</a>:
[QUOTE]I'd apologize for laughing and nudge him in the direction of turning this dream honeymoon fantasy into a 5 or 10 year anniversary reality. FWIW, I can see why he may be hurt you laughed,
Posted by ILoveMilkDuds[/QUOTE]

Ditto! Put yourself in his shoes. Imagine if you'd taken on honeymoon planning then shared your vision ... and he laughed in your face.

vbjoanna · August 2012

GoodLuck Bear, that's our plan -- a few nights at a nearby place (we're thinking Monticello), then a nice long trip to Ireland next summer. With my work schedule, I wasn't even sure I'd be able to take off after the wedding (Sept 1), and since we're paying for the wedding ourselves, we'll need to re-stock the coffers to afford the Ireland trip, which we've been wanting to do for awhile now -- a delayed HM or even anniversary trip is a great reason to do it!

No Honeymoon, Honey.

Re: No Honeymoon, Honey.

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