African American Weddings

Big vs. Small Wedding

My FI and I have more or less worked out a compromise, but our wedding still scares him. I've been trying to get him to understand. I come from the traditional large African-American family with a bunch of other extended members who you have know ideaa how they are related, but no matter what they are "Cousin". When my family is getting together we do it big and invite everyone and have a HUGE party. My FI can't wrap his mind around that for one he is from the tiny European country of Belgium. Being an only child can't be an excuse for him because I am also. When I mention that we have big family GTGs he finds it crazy because he has never had one. He was so amazed the day after we got Engaged that in only a few hours my mom had planned a large family BBQ to celebrate.

He hates when I mention the approx. amount of people to be invited to the wedding. He always says he is scared of the big wedding. We have worked out a compromise, since he wants a small wedding we are having a small one in Vegas just us and then we come back to California for the big wedding. Later in Belgium we have a small party with his family.

He acts as if the big wedding will be horrible, but I keep assuring him he will have the time of his life and he won't regret it at all.
Photobucket
"Ever Thine, Ever Mine, Ever Ours"
Janae & Olivier


Anniversary

Re: Big vs. Small Wedding

  • ladylumladylum member
    500 Comments Fourth Anniversary
    edited December 2011
    Both have their merits. Does he understand that when he married you he inherits a big family? lol Glad you were able to work out a compromise.
  • edited December 2011


    I am doing the same thing. We are getting marrried on my mothers birthday May 24 2011   (she is no longer with me). Then on Sep 10 2011we are having a larger wedding .So if that makes you two happy then do it . 
  • edited December 2011
    In Response to <a href="http://forums.theknot.com/Sites/theknot/Pages/Main.aspx/cultural-wedding-boards_african-american-weddings_big-vs-small-wedding?plckFindPostKey=Cat:Cultural Wedding BoardsForum:400Discussion:f037f3eb-2b1b-4ff3-82c8-7d51ef33ec4ePost:ccdefc62-c135-4558-ac9d-351eb9ff0b73">Re: Big vs. Small Wedding</a>:
    [QUOTE]Both have their merits. Does he understand that when he married you he inherits a big family? lol Glad you were able to work out a compromise.
    Posted by ladylum[/QUOTE]

    Exactely my thoughts.

    Welcome to the board and my citizenship is also from Belgium.....
  • edited December 2011
    In Response to <a href="http://forums.theknot.com/Sites/theknot/Pages/Main.aspx/cultural-wedding-boards_african-american-weddings_big-vs-small-wedding?plckFindPostKey=Cat:Cultural Wedding BoardsForum:400Discussion:f037f3eb-2b1b-4ff3-82c8-7d51ef33ec4ePost:beaadb66-d679-4218-836e-ef9944e98e67">Re: Big vs. Small Wedding</a>:
    [QUOTE]In Response to Re: Big vs. Small Wedding : Exactely my thoughts. Welcome to the board and my citizenship is also from Belgium.....
    Posted by Mypasmita[/QUOTE]

    I love Belgium. I'm there now. I've been here for 3 months. I go back to the states on Monday :( Won't see my baby until June.
    Photobucket
    "Ever Thine, Ever Mine, Ever Ours"
    Janae & Olivier


    Anniversary
  • edited December 2011
    Oh! Sorry to hear. My fi lives in the Uk so i understand!
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