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Christian Weddings
Having a dry wedding and already getting complaints
My Fiance and I are very firm about wanting a dry wedding.
We are having a dry wedding for religious purposes and also because we have a handful of alcoholics in the family and don't want any issues.
We are already getting some complaints from family and friends and know there will be more to come when it's officially announced on our save the dates.
How do I get people to understand? Has anyone faced this problem?
We are having a dry wedding for religious purposes and also because we have a handful of alcoholics in the family and don't want any issues.
We are already getting some complaints from family and friends and know there will be more to come when it's officially announced on our save the dates.
How do I get people to understand? Has anyone faced this problem?
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Re: Having a dry wedding and already getting complaints
I was planning on putting it on the save the dates as suggested by some cousins who also had a dry wedding and as requested by my parents. The suggestion/request was made so that people know right away.
[QUOTE]Thank you for the advice :) I was planning on putting it on the save the dates as suggested by some cousins who also had a dry wedding and as requested by my parents. The suggestion/request was made so that people know right away.
Posted by LIzBurke3[/QUOTE]
<div>It really rubs me the wrong way to put it on the STD. I wouldn't do it. You could create a wedding website and have it there instead, then put the website on the STD. I feel like putting "dry reception" on the STD is either shoving it in people's faces or asking for their input, neither of which you're trying to do.</div><div>
</div><div>To put it on the website, I would write something like</div><div>
</div><div>Our reception will be held in the XYZ venue from This time to That time. Dinner and a selection of non-alcholic beverages will be served.</div><div>
</div><div>Much more subtle, but still gets the info out there.</div>
[QUOTE]In Response to Re: Having a dry wedding and already getting complaints : It really rubs me the wrong way to put it on the STD. I wouldn't do it. You could create a wedding website and have it there instead, then put the website on the STD. I feel like putting "dry reception" on the STD is either shoving it in people's faces or asking for their input, neither of which you're trying to do. To put it on the website, I would write something like<strong><u> Our reception will be held in the XYZ venue from This time to That time. Dinner and a selection of non-alcholic beverages will be served</u></strong>. Much more subtle, but still gets the info out there.
Posted by DramaGeek[/QUOTE]
I like that!
I hope it works out for you:)
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[QUOTE] I agree with others I would not put this on the save the date. If they show up and it's not there they can't complain to you until it's over.
Posted by CheetaNita05[/QUOTE]<div>
</div><div>This. I wouldn't bother putting it on the wedding website, either. I would hate for people not to come because they know it's dry, or for them to pre-drink heavily to compensate...
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[QUOTE]In Response to Re: Having a dry wedding and already getting complaints : This. I wouldn't bother putting it on the wedding website, either. I would hate for people not to come because they know it's dry, or for them to pre-drink heavily to compensate...
Posted by kipnus[/QUOTE]
I suppose that's a possibility, but I know that we didn't have anyone skip the reception because it was dry, nor did anyone pre-game or sneak out to the parking lot for a drink. If you have a fun event, no one will even miss the alcohol. Even the heavy drinkers in our family were on the dance floor having a great time - and those are the people who say "you won't see me dance unless I'm drunk!"
On the flip side, H's cousin got married 8 months after us. The beer was flowing freely. When we left everyone was completely wasted. We found out later that one of their friends did close to $10k damage to the property where they were married because he decided to do cookies on the front lawn and ran into an outbuilding. The police were also called because the party got too out of control. So yeah, I think we made the right choice!
We'll serve alcohol, but I'm hoping to avoid having any myself. Sometimes I can have 3 drinks and be fine the next morning. Sometimes I can have half a glass of wine and get an awful headache. I don't want to risk it, as we're flying across a continent and an ocean the day after our wedding.
FWIW, our wedding was dry, there was no announcement saying such, and no one had any issues.
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People will ALWAYS find something to complain about. When people ask, tell them it's a dry wedding and stand firm in your decision. However, I urge you to not announce it ahead of time. You will only open yourself up to more complaints and opinions. Good Luck! I know how stressful it can be.
[QUOTE]You may never get them to understand. Just be firm in your stance. When people make comments, respond with something like, "thank you for your opinion. So, what are you doing this weekend?" We did have a dry wedding, but if anyone complained it wasn't to us. Oh, and by "officially announced," do you mean you're putting something on the STDs about it being dry? Please don't do that. There's no need to advertise it. Just have plenty of good beverages and let people deal.
Posted by DramaGeek[/QUOTE]
I agree with all of this.
Don't make a big deal of it or advertise it, and have a good variety of non-alcoholic cold and hot drinks with and without caffeine.
We had a dry reception. My parents were unhappy about it, but when we explained that we were having a mid-morning wedding and a early afternoon to mid-afternoon reception, they realized there wasn't really a need for alcohol. No one missed it either.
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[QUOTE]we are having limited amounts of alcohol....we both drink so think it would be kind of wierd to have a dry wedding and<strong> force everyone to not drink on a day of celebration</strong>...but we dont want it to get out of control...so we are putting 1 (possibly 2 if budget allows) bottle of wine on each table, reminding people that it is for toasting, and then when its gone, its gone and thats the end of the alchohol. We won't be telling anyone this befor hand, although, we wont not tell people this if they specifically ask.
Posted by toothpastechica[/QUOTE]
That comes off as a bit condescending to me. I didn't force anyone to do or not do anything at my wedding, and it was still a celebration.
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[QUOTE]wine was part of celebrating in the bible, i see no reason not to use it, if you want to have a dry wedding thats to you, but saying that my views on it are condecending...makes you sound a little judgemental tbh. I was just stating what we are doing and why. glad to know the christian board is friendly right ;)
Posted by toothpastechica[/QUOTE]
What's condescending is the implication that the absence of alcohol is the only reason that people would not drink it at a celebratory event. As if it's not a true celebration until you've assaulted your liver with a sufficient amount of ethanol.
I am a perfectly friendly person, but I don't appreciate the implication that I forced anyone to do anything, or that my wedding was less than a celebration because we didn't provide wine for toasting, a tradition that we skipped entirely because we didn't want our guests to have to sit through another rote tradition before we opened the dance floor.
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[QUOTE]In Response to Re: Having a dry wedding and already getting complaints : <strong>What's condescending is the implication that the absence of alcohol is the only reason that people would not drink it at a celebratory event</strong>. As if it's not a true celebration until you've assaulted your liver with a sufficient amount of ethanol. I am a perfectly friendly person, but I don't appreciate the implication that I forced anyone to do anything, or that my wedding was less than a celebration because we didn't provide wine for toasting, a tradition that we skipped entirely because we didn't want our guests to have to sit through another rote tradition before we opened the dance floor.
Posted by sessionswedding[/QUOTE]
its the only reason why people would not drink at <strong>MY</strong> wedding....get over it. If you read the whole orginal post and not just the lines you want to take out of context...i clearly stated that <strong>Me and My FI both drink</strong> and <strong><u>THAT</u></strong> is the reason we think it would be wierd to not have it....not because i think everyone needs to have it...or need to not have it...i thought that was pretty clear. If it wasn't im sorry, but i really dont understand why im being jumped on for this. Now if you to talk about being condescending...you are now saying everyone is MAKING thier guests sit through speeches???
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