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mother in law ans soon to be sister in laws

April+ChristopherApril+Christopher member
First Comment
in Moms and Maids
So im getting married in 2 months. I super excited. Except for one thing...my future mother in law just told my future husband that he can do better and should marry me. I've been getting the feeling that she and her daughters dont wanted us to get married but never thought she'd actually say it. The oldest sister has told him that money doesn't buy love, and asked him to give her 10 reason why he loves and is marrying me. And his other sister is telling him that he and i have changed and she can't talk to us. but luckly his youngest sister hasn't mentioned anything yet.  (i just dont get it, we are in our 20s and want to start our own lives and they dont understand that things change and people move on)

Personally im wicked angery but i keep holding on to it and fighting with my future husband about how i feel. Is it wrong that i dont want anything to do with them. He did stick up for me but i feel like that didnt do anything. Help please. Should i just ignore it?
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Re: mother in law ans soon to be sister in laws

  • MairePoppyMairePoppy mod
    Moderator Knottie Warrior 5000 Comments 500 Love Its
    Why did her fi repeat all that stuff to you? He must have know it would upset you.
                       
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  • April+ChristopherApril+Christopher member
    First Comment
    i was there when she said it.
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  • NevtaliNevtali member
    Third Anniversary 10 Comments
    In Response to <a href="http://forums.theknot.com/Sites/theknot/Pages/Main.aspx/special-topic-wedding-boards_moms-maids_mother-in-law-ans-soon-to-be-sister-in-laws?plckFindPostKey=Cat:Special%20Topic%20Wedding%20BoardsForum:357Discussion:ef85e319-6183-44e5-a9e7-95df22c390e7Post:eaf27496-0ad4-40a1-9394-a02204377cc4">mother in law ans soon to be sister in laws</a>:
    [QUOTE]So im getting married in 2 months. I super excited. Except for one thing...my future mother in law just told my future husband that he can do better and should marry me. I've been getting the feeling that she and her daughters dont wanted us to get married but never thought she'd actually say it. The oldest sister has told him that <strong>money doesn't buy love</strong>, and asked him to give her 10 reason why he loves and is marrying me. And his other sister is telling him that he and i have changed and she can't talk to us. but luckly his youngest sister hasn't mentioned anything yet.  (i just dont get it, we are in our 20s and want to start our own lives and they dont understand that things change and people move on) Personally im wicked angery but i keep holding on to it and fighting with my future husband about how i feel. Is it wrong that i dont want anything to do with them. He did stick up for me but i feel like that didnt do anything. Help please. Should i just ignore it?
    Posted by April+Christopher[/QUOTE]

    What did she mean by this?
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  • kmmssgkmmssg mod
    Moderator Knottie Warrior 5000 Comments 500 Love Its
    You say he stuck up for you, can you tell how that convo went?  It is one thing to say "Mom, don't say those things", it is another to say "I will not allow you to disrespect my future wife."

    How did that go?
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  • MairePoppyMairePoppy mod
    Moderator Knottie Warrior 5000 Comments 500 Love Its
    edited August 2012
    In Response to <a href="http://forums.theknot.com/Sites/theknot/Pages/Main.aspx/special-topic-wedding-boards_moms-maids_mother-in-law-ans-soon-to-be-sister-in-laws?plckFindPostKey=Cat:Special%20Topic%20Wedding%20BoardsForum:357Discussion:ef85e319-6183-44e5-a9e7-95df22c390e7Post:e38bb6cb-5daf-4571-8ea0-ea2274128a39">Re: mother in law ans soon to be sister in laws</a>:
    [QUOTE]i was there when she said it.
    Posted by April+Christopher[/QUOTE]

    I wouldn't have anything to do with anyone who spoke to me like that !

    Your Fi should have told his mom and sister that unless they treat you with respect, they will not be seeing either of you, because you are a package deal. And he should say it in a way that leaves no doubt in their or your minds that he means business. Don't marry this guy, if he isn't sticking up for you.
                       
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  • Muffin'sMomMuffin'sMom
    1000 Comments
    In Response to <a href="http://forums.theknot.com/Sites/theknot/Pages/Main.aspx/special-topic-wedding-boards_moms-maids_mother-in-law-ans-soon-to-be-sister-in-laws?plckFindPostKey=Cat:Special Topic Wedding BoardsForum:357Discussion:ef85e319-6183-44e5-a9e7-95df22c390e7Post:c9cd1a2e-c5d2-4459-90d1-5340b907d60e">Re: mother in law ans soon to be sister in laws</a>:
    [QUOTE]In Response to Re: mother in law ans soon to be sister in laws : I wouldn't have anything to do with anyone who spoke to me like that ! Your Fi should have told his mom and sister that unless they treat you with respect, they will not be seeing either of you, because you are a package deal. And he should say it in a way that leaves no doubt in their or your minds that he means business. Don't marry this guy, if he isn't sticking up for you.
    Posted by MairePoppy[/QUOTE]

    THIS...Maire is wise.  Marriage is tough enough without fighting him AND his family.
    My baby girl is a married woman...and now my baby girl HAS a baby girl. Time unfolds in such an amazing way. I've been blessed!
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  • KlussJKlussJ
    First Comment
    As a soon to be MIL, there's two sides to every story. My soon to be daughter in law at times can be to much, as I can be too. I however know how much my son loves her and would never disrespect him. That said, think of the position it puts your FI in. It's his mom, and you did say he did stick up for you. Everyone is saying you shouldn't marry him, what is it you want him to do? Disown his family? I think you should talk his mother, just the two of you. Ask her just what is going on. She could be viewing things differently, I don't know why she would say something like that as a mom I find it confusing. However something is going on. See where that takes you. Keep cool, respectful and let her know how much you love your son and let her do most of the talking. If it goes well then that's great, if not then your FI will see the big effort you put into trying to make things right. You are the most important woman in his life, but at one time she was. Maybe that's her problem. I wouldn't worry about the sisters, they will follow " mom"
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