Not the FMIL or MOH but the groomsmen!

Re: Not the FMIL or MOH but the groomsmen!

• Butter Cookie member

  

  January 2011 edited December 2011

  In Response to <a href="http://forums.theknot.com/Sites/theknot/Pages/Main.aspx/special-topic-wedding-boards_wedding-woes_not-fmil-moh-but-groomsmen?plckFindPostKey=Cat:Special%20Topic%20Wedding%20BoardsForum:47Discussion:74459bcb-b90b-4abe-96fc-c8d299156cfcPost:779713f7-67ce-49ac-a010-7a2aa933dda1">Not the FMIL or MOH but the groomsmen!</a>:
  [QUOTE]Kay I'm doing fine with everyone else in the wedding party except the GROOMSMEN! We came up with three of his friends that he wanted in the party which I was totally fine with, he asks his best man who is more than happy to be the best man, asked the first groomsman and he kept<strong> humming and haaaing</strong> and said he wouldn't even know if he could make it till two months before the wedding!!!! I told my finacee that I would rather he ask someone else so that last minute running around and asking wouldn't be a stress lurking in the background. So he instead asked one of his two brothers and his brother said yes right away! We got a super excited response from the second groomsman and said he would get the time from work booked off the next day (this was more than month ago) and we just got a message from him last night saying he feels its too stressful! Our wedding is going to be laid back and more than likely less stressful than keeping that strapless wedding dress to stay up all day til the reception!  I have a feeling it was his girlfriend who made him bow out because she didn't want to sit alone or someting. Its just really stressful cause he doesn't have many friends that he's still in touch with and well he works alot so it makes things harder as well. Anyone else have this kinda problem?
  Posted by dolly33[/QUOTE]
  
  It's hemming and hawing.
  
  <strong><em>hem and haw</em></strong> To be hesitant and indecisive; equivocate
  
  You've asked these people, and they have given you honest answers about how they feel. What more can you really ask for?
  
  Don't replace them, either. It's rude to them because they're replacable and to whoever you choose in their place, because they will know they weren't your first choice.

  

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• sister2groom

  

  January 2011 edited December 2011

  His girlfriend shouldn't be sitting alone, so I'm not sure why that would be a problem (seating couples separately is pretty rude, and them being in the wedding party is not a valid reason for an exception).

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• redheadtmk member

  

  January 2011 edited December 2011

  I am not engaged yet so I dont have that problem. However my BF does not have any close guy friends and his older brother passed away when they were children. I can't imagine who he would ask to stand up with him. Whoever it is will be whoever he hangs out with at the time I am sure. I can understand how you feel for him not having anyone super close. I am sorry for what you are going through.

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• goat&rehab member

  

  January 2011 edited December 2011

  if you think its the girlfriend, why not give her a job during the wedding so she feels involved?  just a thought, good luck.

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• dolly33

  

  January 2011 edited December 2011

  With the seating afterwards we were planning on sitting the couples together for the reception (no head  table) and during the cermony everyone from his hometown will be sitting together (and its a really small town where everyone knows everyone else).
  
   I even asked my finacee if he wanted her in the party but he said no because I didn't know her that well and he didn't want me to stress over getting along with her. And well both the groomsmens said they can't do it and to find another one (which is hard seeing as they were his closest friends that he has).
   
  I don't know about the groomsmen thing, if we can't figure something out I am going to screw even numbers and continue wedding planning. Thanks for the help
   
  

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