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do your rabbis/cantors charge for officiating?

rag828rag828 member
First Comment
in Jewish Weddings
if so, can you give me an idea of how much? mine does NOT charge, b/c my family is a member of the temple for many years, so my future FIL doesn't know how much to donate to the synagogue and wanted me to find out how much my friends have paid for their officiants...


HELP!
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Re: do your rabbis/cantors charge for officiating?

  • october010brideoctober010bride
    1000 Comments
    edited December 2011
    Mine isn't charging either because FMIL is a member. But we're doing a donation of 150 to the cantor's fund and 300 to the rabbis fund.
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  • sakana1840sakana1840
    2500 Comments Third Anniversary
    edited December 2011
    mine is and my FI's grandmother is a member

    he's charging us $250...
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  • caraellen23caraellen23
    2500 Comments
    edited December 2011

    My parents belong to our rabbi's congregation and there is still a fee/donation.  We are waiting to hear what it is, but its expensive, several hundred dollars (over $500).  Our cantor is my cousin, so we are getting her a small, personal gift.

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  • Jeni35Jeni35 member
    100 Comments
    edited December 2011
    Our rabbi does not charge a fee at the temple; but since he is flying to us- we are paying for his ticket and a $500 fee. We have built a relationship with him and feel confident and comfortable with him marrying us. Since we recently moved to this area, we just haven't had time to build the right relationship.
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  • RachiemooRachiemoo member
    Tenth Anniversary 500 Comments Combo Breaker
    edited December 2011
    ours is a family friend and did not charge.  we donated $500.00 to the non-profit organization that he works for.
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  • MrsMLRBMrsMLRB
    1000 Comments Third Anniversary
    edited December 2011
    Our rabbi does not charge since we are members of our congregation but we are planning on donating $500 to his fund.
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  • emily1004emily1004 member
    100 Comments
    edited December 2011
    Our rabbi did not charge us. We gave $500 to his fund, and in return he gave us a family membership at the synagogue for a year.  We can use it anytime in the next 5 years. 
    My DH and I did not belong to the synagogue, but it was important to him that Rabbi Roman officiate our wedding. He was the rabbi that officiated my DH fathers funeral four years ago.
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  • razdazzlerazdazzle member
    Fourth Anniversary 500 Comments
    edited December 2011
    Our fee is really high - we aren't members

    $800
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  • Musicheals71Musicheals71 member
    Knottie Warrior 5000 Comments Combo Breaker
    edited December 2011
    My parents' rabbi, who is marrying us at my parents' synagogue, costs $500.  If I wanted a cantor as well, it would be an additional $400, so I decided not to have a cantor.
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  • masteralephmasteraleph member
    10 Comments
    edited December 2011
    Rabbis and cantors generally do charge, unless you're a member (sometimes).  It's generally appropriate to give a donation to their discretionary fund if they don't charge.  I'm in the NY area, so the charges tend to be higher, in the $600-1000 range.  At least in this area, it's also standard for synagogues to charge you a certain amount for clergy costs even if you're not using their clergy (i.e. if you bring your own rabbi).
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  • lynniearudnerlynniearudner
    1000 Comments
    edited December 2011
    our rabbi does not have a regular congregation, though our "fee" gets us a membership to his "interfaith congregation" for a couple of years. it is based out of his home, though he does hold services there on most holidays. since we are 2000 miles away, though, we can never attend! 

    he charges, (a LOT!) since i think he realizes that finding a rabbi to officiate interfaith services is difficult. supply and demand, i guess, though i find the actual sum ($1500) appalling. 

    but beggars cant be choosers, i suppose. 
    http://www.mywedding.com/lynnieandandy
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  • FrozenpenguinFrozenpenguin
    10 Comments
    edited December 2011
    Our rabbi is charging $800. She is meeting with us approx 9 times before the wedding to do an personal ceremony and pre-wedding counseling since we are inter-faith so I feel the $800 is not too bad since we are spending a lot of time with her. We met with the Rabbi that Lynnie is talking about I feel like $1500 is just outrageous. IBut there are only a few rabbis in Upstate NY that will marry interfaith couples so it can get pricey.
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  • fembott25fembott25
    10 Comments
    edited December 2011

    My FI is Greek Orthadox and I am jewish and we  are looking for a resaonable priced Rabbi in Connecticut who will co offiiciate with a someone else ? Please help ! Eveyerone I have spoken with is between $900 and $2,000 which I think is crazy.

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  • FrozenpenguinFrozenpenguin
    10 Comments
    edited December 2011
    Try the website www.interfaithfamily.com there is a spot on there where you can request a list of rabbis near you that will co-officiate. Good Luck.
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  • slbriz34slbriz34
    500 Comments
    edited December 2011
    We are members of our synagogue and our rabbi charged us $500 towards his fund (our synagogue is in Brooklyn, btw).  So being a member or not may not be an issue (though some prefer you to be a member because they want to increase the synagogue's membership).  A few of between $500-$900 seems fair to me; anything above that, I'd shop around because you can definitely find someone that you want, who'll listen to you, and be within your budget.

    Definitely hit up interfaithfamily - if you don't get an immediate response, be sure to follow up (DH mom, who recently remarried, had delayed contact, but was able to find someone she liked).

    GL.
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  • joysaw00joysaw00 member
    Fourth Anniversary 10 Comments
    edited December 2011
    I charge $500 to officiate a wedding, which is a pretty standard "freelance" rate in the Philadelphia area.

    Good luck,
    Joysa

    http://wanderinghebrew.com/weddings-and-funerals-jewish-or-interfaith/
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