MOH

chloeblanch · March 2012

MOH

RockstarWifey0912 · March 2012

The biggest issue I can see with her not being 18- I don't think she can sign the license as a witness.

Otherwise, why can't she be a MOH and then an older BM for the other stuff?

Kristin789 · March 2012

Your MOH should be your very best friend, who can mentor you and encourage you in your courtship and through your marriage. Usually that's NOT the bride's sister - it's a friend of the bride and the bride's sister is a bridesmaid.

Your sister does not have the relationship experience and adulthood to mentor someone about to be married and through the difficult first year of marriage, etc.

DeannaCW · March 2012

I've never heard of the mentoring thing... I just always figured it should be the one you're closest to.

You will probably have many people tell you this, but there are no real "duties" of any bridesmaid. They just have to get the dress and show up for the wedding, all else is frosting.

So... if age was not a factor possibly preventing her from these so-called "duties", would she be the one you'd choose? How you answer this shoud tell you whether or not to answer.

FWIW, I've asked only one sister to be bridesmaid; the other, I'm having her son as RB. My MOH is my best friend who I met in high school. This had the added plus of avoiding family politics or hurt feelings about sisters' roles.

Meghannsix · March 2012

Ugh, Kristen.

Your MOH should be whoever you're closest too, whether it be a sister or close friend, or whoever. I have never in my life heard of the MOH being a mentor for your married life. The MOH stands next to you at the ceremony, maybe holds your bouquet, and if she's old enough, signs the marriage license. She (or he) or any of your other BM's are not required to throw parties or be unpaid wedding planners. If you're close to your sister, choose her.

But then again, you're not even actually engaged yet, so why worry too much about it?

JaxInBlue · March 2012

My MOH was also NOT someone who could mentor me in marriage. That role will be filled by our spiritual advisor and by our parents.

Your MOH should be nearest and dearest friend. If that's your sister, then your sister should be your MOH. Your other bridesmiads may pick up on her age and her inability due to age to host a bachelorette for you. If not, not having a bachelorette isn't the end of the world; you can always suggest your group have a girls' night or lunch - as long as you don't host your own bachelorette party or shower.

The only duties of the MOH are to wear the appropriate attire, hold your flowers, maybe help with your train, and to be reasonable about participating in a few pictures. Your sister might even be able to sign your license - it depends on the laws in your state and you can call your city or county office (whichever issues a license) to ask.

But I also agree with Meghan. You're not engaged yet, and you're probably not going to want to ask your party to stand up with you until 6-9 months out from your date.

owengirl996 · March 2012

In Response to <a href="http://forums.theknot.com/Sites/theknot/Pages/Main.aspx/special-topic-wedding-boards_moms-maids_sister-automatically-maid-of-honor?plckFindPostKey=Cat:Special Topic Wedding BoardsForum:357Discussion:e0f21805-90a8-4f9d-87bf-a9ad1c05412bPost:138f1186-c599-410e-92ca-dbff70f49e92">Re: Sister automatically maid of honor?</a>:
[QUOTE]Ugh, Kristen. Your MOH should be whoever you're closest too, whether it be a sister or close friend, or whoever. I have never in my life heard of the MOH being a mentor for your married life. The MOH stands next to you at the ceremony, maybe holds your bouquet, and if she's old enough, signs the marriage license. She (or he) or any of your other BM's are not required to throw parties or be unpaid wedding planners. If you're close to your sister, choose her. But then again, you're not even actually engaged yet, so why worry too much about it?
Posted by Meghannsix[/QUOTE]

This...exactly this.

My MOH is my sister...she has never been in a relationship, never even been kissed and is 23 years old. I'm not worried about her mentoring me...I'm just excited to have her standing by my side, first in line, as I'm saying my vows :) Everything else she does for me is just a bonus.

Sscholfield · March 2012

Please please please don't make your sister your MOH out of obligation because she's your sister. I did this and I completely regret it now. Fortunately she's married, so she's my matron of honor and my best friend is my maid of honor. I love my sister dearly, but we're not close friends, or really anything alike.

megmac009 · March 2012

I have one sister over the age of 18 and she will not be my MOH. I did not even think twice about it. The minute I got engaged my first call was to my parents the second was to my best freind. She is the one that knows me best and who I want up there. My mom was not to happy and asked me to consider two MOH's, I did think about it but if I were to have two, she would not come to mind. She is unreliable, immature and irresponsible.

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