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Just Engaged and Proposals

Tonight! And an introduction

A little background: I first met my fiance in college, he was actually one of my professors, We were NOT romantically involved when I was in university, though we considered each other friends (and I will admit I was attracted to him). We reconnected 3 years later. I struggled quite a bit after getting my Masters, went through some strong traumas, aggravating some childhood trauma. I was in a very delicate position when we reconnected, and he was incredibly supportive of me and helped me out a great deal while I got back on my feet and started my life over again. We started to see each other, and he's been completely wonderful through our relationship.

His aunt died recently, and she left him her house in Northern California. He's going to go down there. It's in the Bay Area, which is a good area for sciences, especially marine biology (my specialty, he teaches biology). Since finding that out I had been in kind of a strange place, feeling like everything was in limbo. Would I stay or would I go? Would I feel comfortable moving in with him? Do I even want to stay in Washington? I have trust and abandonment issues, and I've lived with boyfriends befor and had it end very badly, and I didn't feel comfortable moving in with "just a boyfriend" so far away.

Robert's known I've been in a funk since finding out (he has too. He's still mourning his aunt, who he was extremely close to, and having to get a new job and plan a move is stressful. So he decided we deserved a really nice night to ourselves. So we went to a fancy restaurant (that actually had vegetarian dishes for me to eat!) and saw the documentary about Ai Weiwei (It's excellent, go see it!). Afterward we went back to his house, and sat in his backyard for a smoke and to look at the stars. We were having really great conversation, and he takes me hand and tells me that he wants me to go to California with him, that I'm the love of his life, and he wants to share his life with me. It completely took my breath away. I don't know how long he waited before I could bring myself to say something. I said "Really?" and he pulled out a ring, which made me gasp even more. I was speechless for so long he had to repeat "Will you marry me?" before I actually said yes, which made us both laugh. I was just so happy and overwhelmed with love, I was shaking, I was in shock. I'm still a little in shock. It seems so unreal. I'm excited, though! I feel like after all I've been through I finally deserve happiness.

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