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Ceremony & Honeymoon... no reception?

courtneykalobcourtneykalob member
5 Love Its First Comment
in Honeymoon Discussions
We are just starting the planning process and I've started crunching numbers of some of the costs at venues I would want to host our reception. I must be honest here, I can't justify spending so much money on one night. It makes more sense to me to spend a week as Mr. & Mrs. in paradise rather than a receiption. When I do think of a reception though I'm super tradtional. That being said, I really want to get married in my church and thankfully my fiancee is totally okay with that.

Is it okay to have a ceremony in my church and leave from the church with bags packed for the airport? Has anyone considered anything like this? Does it come off as tacky? Someone once told me that you should consider what you need, must have, and want in your wedding. I need my other half... that's all. 
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Re: Ceremony & Honeymoon... no reception?

  • bunni727bunni727 member
    First Anniversary 5 Love Its First Answer Name Dropper
    That would be really rude to your guests. The reception is the host's way of thanking them for attending.

    Why not have your ceremony at a non-meal time, serve cake and punch in the fellowship hall, and then take off on your honeymoon? Depending on the size of your guest list, you could easily get away with a couple hundred bucks spent.
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  • ViczaesarViczaesar member
    First Anniversary First Comment First Answer 5 Love Its
    In Response to <a href="http://forums.theknot.com/Sites/theknot/Pages/Main.aspx/wedding-boards_honeymoon_ceremony-honeymoon-no-reception?plckFindPostKey=Cat:Wedding%20BoardsForum:11Discussion:3e6cf373-68a0-44bd-9d59-fb91bcd8e541Post:e82aab43-a3f2-47d6-b745-4044ded8cd4c">Ceremony & Honeymoon... no reception?</a>:
    [QUOTE]We are just starting the planning process and I've started crunching numbers of some of the costs at venues I would want to host our reception. I must be honest here, I can't justify spending so much money on one night. It makes more sense to me to spend a week as Mr. & Mrs. in paradise rather than a receiption. When I do think of a reception though I'm super tradtional. That being said, I really want to get married in my church and thankfully my fiancee is totally okay with that. Is it okay to have a ceremony in my church and leave from the church with bags packed for the airport? Has anyone considered anything like this? Does it come off as tacky? Someone once told me that you should consider what you need, must have, and want in your wedding. I need my other half... that's all. 
    Posted by courtneykalob[/QUOTE]
    If you don't want to host a reception, you don't get to invite guests to your ceremony.  ANYBODY invited to your ceremony needs to be hosted in some way that is appropriate to the time of day of your ceremony.



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  • Maggie0829Maggie0829 member
    First Anniversary First Answer First Comment 5 Love Its
    I agree with PP.  If you want family and friends to witness your marriage then you need to host something after the ceremony appropraite to the time of day your ceremony ends.  Not providing anything would be incredibly rude.

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  • GoodLuckBear14GoodLuckBear14 member
    First Anniversary 5 Love Its Combo Breaker First Comment
    edited February 2013
    <div align="left">In Response to <a href="http://forums.theknot.com/Sites/theknot/Pages/Main.aspx/wedding-boards_honeymoon_ceremony-honeymoon-no-reception?plckFindPostKey=Cat:Wedding BoardsForum:11Discussion:3e6cf373-68a0-44bd-9d59-fb91bcd8e541Post:e82aab43-a3f2-47d6-b745-4044ded8cd4c">Ceremony & Honeymoon... no reception?</a>:
    [QUOTE]We are just starting the planning process and I've started crunching numbers of some of the costs at venues I would want to host our reception. I must be honest here, I can't justify spending so much money on one night. It makes more sense to me to spend a week as Mr. & Mrs. in paradise rather than a receiption. When I do think of a reception though I'm super tradtional. That being said, I really want to get married in my church and thankfully my fiancee is totally okay with that. Is it okay to have a ceremony in my church and leave from the church with bags packed for the airport? Has anyone considered anything like this? Does it come off as tacky? Someone once told me that you should consider what you need, must have, and want in your wedding. I need my other half... that's all. 
    Posted by courtneykalob[/QUOTE]

    You sound a lot like my cousin and her husband.  This was their original plan.  My aunt and uncle stepped in and told them exactly what PPers have told you.  If you invite people to your wedding, you have to host them afterwards.  Period.</div>
    Proud to be an old married hag!! image
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  • dazyabbeydazyabbey
    5 Love Its Name Dropper First Anniversary First Comment
    I think the other ladies have this pretty much covered.

    We were kind of in the same boat as you. Had a very low budget and didn't have much money. We were engaged for almost 2 years. We were both in school full time and working full time but I got a part time job to help pay for it.

    If you do decide to invite people to your wedidng ceremony you must host them. Wether that be at a nice afternoon punch and cake reception or if you just want to cut your guest list and go to a restaurant with your guests. If you want to spend more money on the honeymoon that is fine, but you still need to host your guests. If you can't afford to do both then you need to either postpone your wedding and save more money or one of the cheaper options.

    image
    06.09.2012

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  • marianahallmarianahall
    First Comment
    I would be way less motivated to go to my own wedding if there was no reception!!! lol. Definitely have to do SOMETHING for the guests. In thanks for attending, wedding gifts, and taking time out of their busy lives/schedules to go to your wedding!
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  • alithebridealithebride member
    Name Dropper 5 Love Its First Anniversary First Answer
    if you invite people to watch you get married at minimum you have to give them cake and punch.
    have it in the afternoon in the backyard of the church in the middle of the afternoon. my cousin did it thsi way and it was really nice. just for 2 hours, cake, lemonade, tea, punch, little finger foods-it was fine and totally appropriate.

    if you can afford a HM but not a reception you either invite NO ONE to your wedding (when you get married) or, if you want to invitge them do above OR wait and save until you can do it all.

     

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  • courtneykalobcourtneykalob member
    5 Love Its First Comment
    The number one thing I hate about this website is everyone's idea that this is all about the guests. I'm getting married to my best friend. That is the first and most important fact about this whole process. Someone even specifically mentioned above that this day was about the guests. I'm sorry but I can't see where you are coming from, it's a marriage between two people who are in love first, a celebration second. 
    That all being said we are planning on something more along the lines of a farewell party immediately following in the church's hall. Our bestman/matron of honor will still be able to speak, and we can still cut a cake and all, most importantly to me my father can still walk me down the aisle to my bestfriend. Let me just mention again that I haven't lost sight that this more about the word "marriage" than "wedding". 
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  • Maggie0829Maggie0829 member
    First Anniversary First Answer First Comment 5 Love Its
    In Response to <a href="http://forums.theknot.com/Sites/theknot/Pages/Main.aspx/wedding-boards_honeymoon_ceremony-honeymoon-no-reception?plckFindPostKey=Cat:Wedding BoardsForum:11Discussion:3e6cf373-68a0-44bd-9d59-fb91bcd8e541Post:cd87a341-2f67-4819-a28e-18d5720459e5">Re: Ceremony & Honeymoon... no reception?</a>:
    [QUOTE]The number one thing I hate about this website is everyone's idea that this is all about the guests. I'm getting married to my best friend. That is the first and most important fact about this whole process. Someone even specifically mentioned above that this day was about the guests. I'm sorry but I can't see where you are coming from, it's a marriage between two people who are in love first, a celebration second.  That all being said we are planning on something more along the lines of a farewell party immediately following in the church's hall. Our bestman/matron of honor will still be able to speak, and we can still cut a cake and all, most importantly to me my father can still walk me down the aisle to my bestfriend. Let me just mention again that I haven't lost sight that this more about the word "marriage" than "wedding". 
    Posted by courtneykalob[/QUOTE]

    I agree with what Liatris said in regards to your post.

    The wedding ceremony is about the couple and their union, but if you involve others in that ceremony you must still be a proper host/hostess to your guests.  That means hosting some type of reception after the ceremony.  If you want the entire day to be just about you and your FI then eloping is the best option because then you don't have to worry about thanking your guests with any type of reception because there won't be any guests to entertain.

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  • dalm0mdalm0m member
    First Anniversary 5 Love Its First Comment Combo Breaker
    Your wedding can be all about you.  It is your wedding. 

    All this board is saying is that once you involve other people you need to treat them nicely.  If you are asking them to do something for you -- show up at your ceremony -- you need to do something for them -- traditionally feed them.  Cake & punch in the church hall is sufficient & doesn't cost much but you can't just run off your HM without so much as a thank you for coming. 

    If you have no interest in greeting, thanking & feeding people, you don't have to.  You just can't invote them either. 
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  • alithebridealithebride member
    Name Dropper 5 Love Its First Anniversary First Answer
    In Response to <a href="http://forums.theknot.com/Sites/theknot/Pages/Main.aspx/wedding-boards_honeymoon_ceremony-honeymoon-no-reception?plckFindPostKey=Cat:Wedding BoardsForum:11Discussion:3e6cf373-68a0-44bd-9d59-fb91bcd8e541Post:cd87a341-2f67-4819-a28e-18d5720459e5">Re: Ceremony & Honeymoon... no reception?</a>:
    [QUOTE]The number one thing I hate about this website is everyone's idea that this is all about the guests. I'm getting married to my best friend. That is the first and most important fact about this whole process. Someone even specifically mentioned above that this day was about the guests. I'm sorry but I can't see where you are coming from, it's a marriage between two people who are in love first, a celebration second.  That all being said we are planning on something more along the lines of a farewell party immediately following in the church's hall. Our bestman/matron of honor will still be able to speak, and we can still cut a cake and all, most importantly to me my father can still walk me down the aisle to my bestfriend. Let me just mention again that I haven't lost sight that this more about the word "marriage" than "wedding". 
    Posted by courtneykalob[/QUOTE]

    the WEDDING is about you and FI. the RECEPTION for the guests.

     

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