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November 2012 Weddings
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HELP PLEASE!?!

tingleys87tingleys87 member
First Comment
in November 2012 Weddings
So nothing I want for our wedding is happening, working, falling into place. Theres fighting with my family, and fiancee about it. I'm stressed.  My FH keeps telling me we should run away because it is causing to much stress... I want to be able to wear a nice dress and have pictures taken, a cake, dancing and all that goes with a wedding.  But he had a point so I looked into elopement packages, and came across packages that included up to 20 people.  Would it be ok to have imediate family there, and to have a party later. (I am closer to my friends than I am my family and I want them there.) I am so confused and upset I cant decide what I should do.  I need suggestions or help with clearity if you could please. thanks
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Re: HELP PLEASE!?!

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    kantonikkantonik
    First Comment
    oooo nooo! That's a really upsetting/crappy position to be in. What is all the fighting about? I know when FI and I first got engaged I had a few arguments with my parents over what I wanted for the wedding, guests, etc. but, I gave it some time, explained to  them what I wanted and all eventually settled down. It's definately a stressful time for sure. Maybe give it some time to settle down and see if things work themselves out before you run off and elope? If you want a wedding with everyone there, photographer, cake, etc. then I would give it some time...although I'm sure you and FI will be happily married..you definately don't want to regret and think about "what could have been" for your wedding later on.

    On the other hand though, my mom did mention at one point that we could always have a small, intimate wedding with just a select few people, and then have a party with everyone else later on to celebrate! So your idea is possible and acceptable. 
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    ktsannktsann member
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    I remember when I first got engaged and started to plan my mom was so stressed out over the money part of it that she would just get mad, which made me really upset. But, I gave it time and it got better.
     If you want a wedding with cake, a dress, and dancing, then my advice is to just sit down your parents and talk to them that the fighting and arguing is not fair to you two becuase you are excited and its bringing you two down.
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    JaimeNicole74JaimeNicole74
    First Comment
    I have known a few people who have a had a small intimate wedding and a reception later on. There is absolutely nothing wrong with that. After all its yours and your future hubbys day, make it the way you want it. As for the family dilemma, I hope everything eases up for you soon.
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    tingleys87tingleys87 member
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    Thanks, most of the problem is money and my mom and I not liking anything thats the same, always opposite. like we went to a bridal show, i want low centerpieces, my mother picked out all the 3-5ft tall centerpieces, and she always says how its stupid to get married (even tho she is).  She is just argumentative about everything, and says she will pay, then says she won't, she will she wont... then of course she complains about things like a unity candle, guestbook, and photography being over $500... it goes on and on...

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    EricksonBrideEricksonBride
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    I went to a very similar situation. A lot of tears were shed, and a lot of arguments were had. We considered eloping, and looked into elopment packages. But we stuck to what we originally wanted and now everything is FINALLY coming into place! It was mostly fighting with my future in-laws vision of what they wanted the wedding to be (and of course money was also a huge issue). You will see, eventually things will start falling into place :) Good Luck!
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