I think food can become a pissing match much to easily...
I'm a fan of "eat what I make (especially if there's a variety) or make your own"--within reason (to be amended when Buffy tries to eat PB&J for 8 months straight)
My parents mostly let us serve ourselves and mostly said "eat what you put on your plate" (and there were usually options at meals--so you hate the pork but want salad? have 1/2 a bite of pork and the salad.
(But kids are kids and make stupid choices...so the fact that they were all "be ambitious, try a tomato" so...I did but put 3 on my plate and found none of them edible (I still don't eat tomatoes for the record. It's a texture thing)...that gets fuzzy--you don't want to punish the kid for 'trying' {for the record, they followed the 'you can't leave until your plate is clean' rule...but didn't stop my grandpa from helping by eating the last 2.9 tomatoes :-P)
I ate/eat pretty much everything. My mom was a good cook. Generally If i didn't like something, it was a side instead of the main course, and I just wouldn't take any.
My sister used to be picky and mom would sometimes make her eat what she made or occasionally would make her a sandwich or a hot dog. She'd always make her try at least 3 bites before she got alternate food.
My sister finally grew out of it and she eats a lot more than she used to.
I was literally forced to eat it. If it was oatmeal for breakfast and I didn't finish it before I left for school I'd come home to find it in the fridge, waiting for me, all coagulated and cold. *gag*
We had to try everything, but if we had tried it and didn't like it, we didn't have to eat it. In general, the meals included things everyone liked. My mom's hope was that continuing to be exposed to things we declared we didn't like, we would eventually get over it.
I'm pretty open when it comes to food. My brother is still a bit of a picky eater, but is a much more adventurous eater than some of the other adults I know.
I like the trying idea. To this day, it's a struggle to get DH to try anything.
I was a good eater. There were few things I didn't like. Lentils and macaroni was one of them. My mom would leave macaroni plain for me and I'd put butter and cheese on it.
There was also chicken caesar salad which I was not a fan of, mostly because we had it so often. My mom would give me a peice of grilled chicken and then she'd make tater tots with it.
The only thing I hated were cooked carrots. When mom made them, she made me have a small serving of them, and I would eat them as fast as I could to get it over with.
my mother is an excellent cook, so this wasn't really an issue. we were encouraged to try it, and if we didn't like it, there was plenty of other things that we did know and could eat.
dinner was never a big pile of unknown stuff and nothing else. unknown stuff was served on the side, or incorporated with something we already liked. we never got to ask, "what is that?" because dad worked for the money to pay for it and mom spent time and effort preparing it, so we should at least respect that it made its way to the table.
My mom made what she made, and it was eaten. Of course, she did make attempts to make stuff I would like, but if it wasn't then I was SOL. I tried to get out of eating broccoli by saying the President didn't like it either, but that went over like a ton of bricks.
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We weren't forced to eat everything on our plates, but I don't think there was ever the option to have something else. I would have never thought to ask for something else. I'm not a picky eater, which means that either the above method worked, or it was never an issue because I'd eat anything.
I ate just about everything except menudo. I didn't always eat liver until my mom tricked me into eating it. I was outside playing while she cooked it and didn't tell me what it was when it was ready. Turns out I liked it.
In Response to <a href="http://forums.theknot.com/Sites/theknot/Pages/Main.aspx/special-topic-wedding-boards_wedding-woes_food-thing?plckFindPostKey=Cat:Special%20Topic%20Wedding%20BoardsForum:47Discussion:1f833f2f-511f-4f1a-a111-80c25d36ed99Post:b229503c-e1fd-4937-9162-2167f6abc241">Re: The food thing.</a>: [QUOTE]ohh, and fried pickles. That would be fantastic right now. Posted by *Barbie*[/QUOTE]
My mom is a good cook, but she made this one dish that still sends shivers of horror down my spine. It was a mushy squash casserole like thing with tomato sauce all over it. I don't like tomato sauce or mushy squash anyways, so to have them combined was double the nasty. I didn't touch Sqaush until I was 20ish and learned that it can actually be delicious.
It does take a village. Some well placed social pressure got my brother tio his current much-less-picky state. I still thank the friend that got the ball rolling.
I'm hoping some of his friends (most of whom are very into food and trying new things) will influence him a bit, or at least shame him into eating things other than steak and french fries.
We had to at least try it before declaring that we didn't like it/wouldn't eat it. If we really didn't like it, we could make ourselve a sandwich (my middle sis ate a LOT of peanut butter growing up) or go hungry.
We had to try something new. But the whole meal was never completely new. The only thing my mom made that we didn't like was liver and onions. She made it for herself and the rest of us ate leftovers.
I can't imagine asking for a pb&j when mom had cooked. None of us were picky eaters though.
I'm going to insiste that 6let try everything, but he doesn't have to like it.
We were poor, so you ate what was in front of you - ALL OF IT.
I hated this and I think it lead me to have some issues with food when I was older. However, I think most of that has resolved itself now. I am probably one of the most adventurous eaters I know. Thank you, Jeffrey Steingarten!
We had a clean plate rule. And then I'd get yelled at for eating too much. If I tried to dodge the mushy veggies by eating just one, I had to sit until they were all gone - until the night I vomited them right back onto the table because they were disgusting.
My parents lied to me about food a lot. They thought that the best way to get me to eat something I didn't like (usually because of the texture or the bitterness of it, not because I hadn't tried it) was to tell me it was something else. I spit a lot of things into napkins, and I still examine my food when I go out (to restaurants) to make sure I haven't been slipped something I didn't ask for.
And of course, for a while I had to eat whatever I was supposed to be eating - rice cakes, plain chicken, whatever - while the rest of the family had normal meals, because I was "fat". That helped.
Bacon has no rules, really. We're trying to teach her intuitive eating, so she makes her own breakfasts and lunches from a bunch of appropriate choices (no ice cream for breakfast, IOW, because she knows that's a treat, and not very nutritious, plus she can have it after lunch if she's really jonesing), and she eats what I make for dinner, but she can choose if she wants to eat all veggies one night, or all meat another, or have a little of everything. She controls her own portions - there absolutely is no "clean plate" rule.
She also is not a supertaster, so she's turned out to be pretty adventurous. In my adulthood, I try more things, but I still have trouble with a lot of textures and most vegetables and heavily spiced dishes. I prefer pretty bland food - to the point that when something tastes perfectly seasoned to me, I know almost everyone else would add other things - more salt, more pepper, something.
Bmom, vomiting at the table was the only way we got out of eating things too. And just because you vomited up the mushy zucchini last month didn't mean you were exempt from trying it this month.
My older brother did this. He's actually a very adventurous eater, but if he doesn't like something, he really doesn't like it. It was pretty much guaranteed that if mom cooked zucchini, Chris was puking at the table.
When my younger brother got a little older he just started getting up and pouring himself cereal if he didn't like the dinner. It didn't go over well, but that didn't stop him. The rest of us pretty much fell in line with the no dessert until you clean your plate rule. I'd eat pretty much anything if it meant I got ice cream after.
Re: The food thing.
I learned to love my vegetables after I got so constipated that I sat and almost broke myself when I was 4.
I'm a fan of "eat what I make (especially if there's a variety) or make your own"--within reason (to be amended when Buffy tries to eat PB&J for 8 months straight)
My parents mostly let us serve ourselves and mostly said "eat what you put on your plate" (and there were usually options at meals--so you hate the pork but want salad? have 1/2 a bite of pork and the salad.
(But kids are kids and make stupid choices...so the fact that they were all "be ambitious, try a tomato" so...I did but put 3 on my plate and found none of them edible (I still don't eat tomatoes for the record. It's a texture thing)...that gets fuzzy--you don't want to punish the kid for 'trying' {for the record, they followed the 'you can't leave until your plate is clean' rule...but didn't stop my grandpa from helping by eating the last 2.9 tomatoes :-P)
I'm pretty open when it comes to food. My brother is still a bit of a picky eater, but is a much more adventurous eater than some of the other adults I know.
I was a good eater. There were few things I didn't like. Lentils and macaroni was one of them. My mom would leave macaroni plain for me and I'd put butter and cheese on it.
There was also chicken caesar salad which I was not a fan of, mostly because we had it so often. My mom would give me a peice of grilled chicken and then she'd make tater tots with it.
The only thing I hated were cooked carrots. When mom made them, she made me have a small serving of them, and I would eat them as fast as I could to get it over with.
dinner was never a big pile of unknown stuff and nothing else. unknown stuff was served on the side, or incorporated with something we already liked. we never got to ask, "what is that?" because dad worked for the money to pay for it and mom spent time and effort preparing it, so we should at least respect that it made its way to the table.
I'm not a picky eater, which means that either the above method worked, or it was never an issue because I'd eat anything.
She serves mushy vegetables. I LOVE vegetables, but I find it nearly impossible to choke hers down.
If I was served mushy vegetables as a kid, I never would have eaten them.
[QUOTE]ohh, and fried pickles. That would be fantastic right now.
Posted by *Barbie*[/QUOTE]
<div>Heavenly. Mmmm.</div>
btw, i think the food issue and the it takes a village issue are related.
I didn't touch Sqaush until I was 20ish and learned that it can actually be delicious.
I'm hoping some of his friends (most of whom are very into food and trying new things) will influence him a bit, or at least shame him into eating things other than steak and french fries.
I can't imagine asking for a pb&j when mom had cooked. None of us were picky eaters though.
I'm going to insiste that 6let try everything, but he doesn't have to like it.
I hated this and I think it lead me to have some issues with food when I was older. However, I think most of that has resolved itself now. I am probably one of the most adventurous eaters I know. Thank you, Jeffrey Steingarten!
My older brother did this. He's actually a very adventurous eater, but if he doesn't like something, he really doesn't like it. It was pretty much guaranteed that if mom cooked zucchini, Chris was puking at the table.
When my younger brother got a little older he just started getting up and pouring himself cereal if he didn't like the dinner. It didn't go over well, but that didn't stop him. The rest of us pretty much fell in line with the no dessert until you clean your plate rule. I'd eat pretty much anything if it meant I got ice cream after.
Crap...I Mean Crafts