Uggggh! Stupid people. Vent! (long)

clseale13 · January 2010

So...just about 99% of our guest list is coming from out of town. We told both families very early on that everyone needed to get hotel rooms b/c we weren't picking and choosing who's family got to stay with us. MY family would have never even thought of asking to stay...while FI's family just ASSUMED that they would be.... but that's really a whole seperate vent and fight.

Anyway, what we DID do was offer for 2 of our GM and their SO's to stay with us. One is coming from OR and the other from CA so we thought we'd help them out and eliminate hotel costs since they're also going to be paying for wedding stuff. There are 2 other friends from that "group" that are coming to the wedding but aren't IN the wedding and were going to be bringing their wives. Well, one of them emails FI yesterday and says," Kaitlyn has to work so I'm flying solo for the wedding. Is everyone just crashing at your house? K & E said that's where they're staying. I can sleep anywhere." What....the... FU*K???

We JUST attended this guy's wedding outside of San Fran in August. Shouldn't he know better? These people are flying in Wed night/Th morning and aren't leaving until Monday. Now I think the other friends wife isn't coming either in which case of course he would just assume he could crash w/us too. We live in a 4 bdrm (but one is a small office) 1900 sqft home w/a 105lb dog. Do I really need SIX friggin house guests 3 days before my wedding? And what would he do during the rehearsal? Of course we'd feel obligated to invite him. But WE'RE paying for our rehearsal!

Of course, part of me feels bad b/c he'll probably be at our house non-stop to hang out w/everyone anyway. But I don't want a big drunk fest leading up to our wedding and that's what this always turns into. These are all very good friends of ours and normally it's a blast...but this is our wedding...not some fun boozing vacation that we sometimes do together. I told FI to handle it. We'll see what he does.

brimcleod · January 2010

Yeah, that just doesn't sound like a good idea...I know personally, I wouldn't want a ton of people at my house, even if they're close friends or family before the wedding. It's stressful enough as it is, without having to worry about cleanliness and being a hostess. Do you have any local friends that they could maybe stay with?

greenlikekermit · January 2010

With all the stress you will be going through right before your wedding, additional house guests will only make things worse.

Just try to be honest with him and explain that it isn't an ideal situation. If you didn't block rooms anywhere, send him the links of a few affordable hotels. It stressed me out just imagining having to go through that right before my wedding. Stick to your guns!

pag41989 · January 2010

Yikes! Me and FI are having the same problem with people assuming they are staying with us or other family members. I don't think so. Just put your foot down, sure they are friends, but at the same time you are going to be going through a lot of stress that week Im sure and I would not want that added stress to everything else.

clseale13 · January 2010

No, there isn't anyone else that they can stay with. We only have a couple local friends that are going to the wedding and they don't know any of them.

I don't mind the GM and their SO's staying. The girls have both been really sweet about double and triple checking if it's really ok that they stay and offering to help out w/anything that I need. It just made sense for them to stay w/us since 1) we have the room to help alleviate some of the financial burden for them and 2)They need to go everywhere we go anyway. It would be silly for them to stay at a hotel and rent a car when they need to go w/us to pick us tuxes, go to the rehearsal, go to the wedding at the same time as us etc.

It's really just these extra friends now that are the issue. I feel bad that FI is in this position...but he needs to take care of it. Not only do they need to get a hotel room...but they need to rent a car (which I know they weren't planning on doing.) How would they get to the wedding? We're going to need both of our cars and we're going to be getting to the location 3 hours early for pics. What in the hell would they do? I feel bad because I really want to help them...but I have to draw a line somewhere right? I just don't want them to feel excluded. Seriously though, people should know better!

clseale13 · January 2010

Thanks girls! We did get a block of rooms at the Crowne Plaza and got them to discount the room from $250 to $99. It's only 2 miles from the wedding location...so that's not a bad deal. I might look into affordable hotels closer to our house...that way they can stay close to everyone if they want and not actually be at our house the whole time.

NYHarleyBride · January 2010

What if you suggested the two guys coming without their wives split a room? I would defininitely hold your ground.

toblave13 · January 2010

Wow. That's really frustrating. I agree with pp about them splitting a room. It's really rude of them to wait until this close to the wedding to now be assuming that they could stay with you guys. Plus, if their SOs aren't coming, then that's less cost for them so splitting a room wouldnt' be a big deal? Maybe?

p.s. We booked rooms at the Crowne Plaza also!

Uggggh! Stupid people. Vent! (long)

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