BM issue

tking1286 · April 2012

Okay, so I feel a little releaved not having issues with my BM, but one of the recently did something. So, when I sent out the invitations I also included a little card about the RD. I talked to one of my BM over Easter weekend, she is my fiances cousin. Anyways, she made a comment that she will not be at the rehearsal dinner part but will come to the rehearsal part. She says she works until noon. We are kind of doing the dinner backwards because the venue is about 30 minutes away and my parents thought it would be easy to eat and then drive up instead of drive up and back or having it at a restuarant. Initially it did not bother me until I started to think about it more. I gave them over a month! So, apparently being a part in our wedding isn't important enough for you to ask off! I don't know. This BM is also getting married in September, which has been where is head has been whenever something wedding related is going on with our wedding. One of my other BM is pissed at her. I honestly don't know what to do. I am hurt because it makes me feel like our wedding is not important to her but I don't want to start something and have problems on the our wedding day. Any advice?

max&lucy · April 2012

I wouldn't worry about it. She can't make it to the RD (she may very well have a good reason), but will come to the rehearsal itself and also, I assume, to the wedding. In my book, this is not a huge deal.

kimberlykh · April 2012

I'd let it go. She may be saving her vacation time for her own wedding or maybe she cannot afford to take time off. As long as she will be at the wedding, she isn't obligated to be at the RD. I know it is disappointing, but I wouldn't make an issue of it.

vineyard12 · April 2012

In Response to <a href="http://forums.theknot.com/Sites/theknot/Pages/Main.aspx/wedding-club-boards_may-2012-weddings_bm-issue?plckFindPostKey=Cat:Wedding Club BoardsForum:f0ca0bc1-9255-4120-8042-b40e7f3e99c5Discussion:52e87a5e-c6a3-47bb-b849-09f1ef00a963Post:f261965e-7ad4-4c74-a661-fac8bdf4930d">Re:BM issue</a>:
[QUOTE]I'd let it go. She may be saving her vacation time for her own wedding or maybe she cannot afford to take time off. As long as she will be at the wedding, she isn't obligated to be at the RD. I know it is disappointing, but I wouldn't make an issue of it.
Posted by kimberlykh[/QUOTE]

I agree with this. Just let it go.

leopardgurl831 · April 2012

I agree with ppl don't worry about it. She is making it to the important part and maybe she doesn't have a lot of time to take off. I know my MOH is getting married and there are ppl not standing up in the wedding because they don't have the time to take off. Also I know my FI is at his limit with no days left between her wedding and ours.

tking1286 · April 2012

Thanks! That's what I thought

ronik77 · April 2012

I agree with the pp, she may only get so many days avail to her and CAN't get out of work. At least she can make it to the important part which is the rehearsal itself.

FutureMrsW9 · April 2012

I agree, with PPs. If she's getting married this year, too, she might need as much time off work as she can get for her own wedding, which I'm sure you understand. As long as she's making it for the actual rehearsal that's all that matters. Don't worry about it.