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New York-Hudson Valley

Roman Catholic Officiant

Does anyone know of a Roman Catholic officiant who will preside over a wedding outside of a church in the Westchester area?  Our venue told us of a priest in Carmel who will actually leave the church for a marriage ceremony (and it will still be recognized by the Catholic church), but my event planner is still trying to find his info.

Thank you!

Re: Roman Catholic Officiant

  • altimat873altimat873 member
    1000 Comments
    edited December 2011
    That is quite unusual from what Ive seen. . .me and my FI are getting married by an officiant at our venue but afterwards are going to go do a separate ceremony in the church so it is recognized by the Catholic Church. Good luck in your search.
  • kristinanddankristinanddan member
    2500 Comments Combo Breaker
    edited December 2011
    In Response to <a href="http://forums.theknot.com/Sites/theknot/Pages/Main.aspx/local-wedding-boards_new-york-hudson-valley_roman-catholic-officiant?plckFindPostKey=Cat:Local%20Wedding%20BoardsForum:113Discussion:ff97aeda-ff48-47b2-8aed-bb73b44d4bc2Post:0cb33744-2ada-47df-9f5e-7011732477e6">Roman Catholic Officiant</a>:
    [QUOTE]Does anyone know of a Roman Catholic officiant who will preside over a wedding outside of a church in the Westchester area?  Our venue told us of a priest in Carmel who will actually leave the church for a marriage ceremony (and it will still be recognized by the Catholic church), but my event planner is still trying to find his info. Thank you!
    Posted by nosillak[/QUOTE]

    He may be a priest, but those marriages aren't recognized by the church. And if they are, he is doing something that isn't kosher.

    Catholics CANNOT be married outside the church without extenuating circumstances and have their marriages recognized; to receive the sacrament, your wedding must be in a church.
    imageimageimage
  • edited December 2011
    In Response to <a href="http://forums.theknot.com/Sites/theknot/Pages/Main.aspx/local-wedding-boards_new-york-hudson-valley_roman-catholic-officiant?plckFindPostKey=Cat:Local Wedding BoardsForum:113Discussion:ff97aeda-ff48-47b2-8aed-bb73b44d4bc2Post:d2fc0fc8-8944-48ab-80d3-3efa8eada41c">Re: Roman Catholic Officiant</a>:
    [QUOTE]In Response to Roman Catholic Officiant : He may be a priest, but those marriages aren't recognized by the church. And if they are, he is doing something that isn't kosher. Catholics CANNOT be married outside the church without extenuating circumstances and have their marriages recognized; to receive the sacrament, your wedding must be in a church.
    Posted by kristinanddan[/QUOTE]

    Ditto this! Everything Kristin said is correct.
  • lauraNkieranlauraNkieran member
    Fifth Anniversary 100 Comments
    edited December 2011
    Never heard of any priest willing to marry someone outside of the church, and if he does something is very sketchy.
  • ssagessage member
    Seventh Anniversary 1000 Comments
    edited December 2011
    In Response to <a href="http://forums.theknot.com/Sites/theknot/Pages/Main.aspx/local-wedding-boards_new-york-hudson-valley_roman-catholic-officiant?plckFindPostKey=Cat:Local Wedding BoardsForum:113Discussion:ff97aeda-ff48-47b2-8aed-bb73b44d4bc2Post:0cb33744-2ada-47df-9f5e-7011732477e6">Roman Catholic Officiant</a>:
    [QUOTE]Does anyone know of a Roman Catholic officiant who will preside over a wedding outside of a church in the Westchester area?  Our venue told us of a priest in Carmel who will actually leave the church for a marriage ceremony (and it will still be recognized by the Catholic church), but my event planner is still trying to find his info. Thank you!
    Posted by nosillak[/QUOTE]

    All pp's are correct.

    However, because you said Carmel, I am wondering if your venue is talking about Father Rich Hassellbach. He was a ordained Catholic priest who left the priesthood for many reasons and now performs ceremonies in the Catholic tradition (or other forms as well). 

    Also, I have never heard him say that the ceremony will be recognized by the church.  so if it is him they are talking about, that might be something they just added. 

    He did marry my husband and I (I am catholic, husband was married before and had a son and we were not willing to go through the annulment process for many reasons - which I would rather not go into here for fear of a religious argument) and he was great.  I had a Catholic-like ceremony and it was perfect. 

    His website is <a href="http://fatherrich.com/">http://fatherrich.com/</a>
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  • MYLOVE315MYLOVE315 member
    100 Comments
    edited December 2011
    I'm using Fr. Rich Hasselbach for my wedding in May.

    Whenver you get married outside the church it isn't recognized by the church but I'm fine with that...doesn't mean I'm goin to hell in a handbasket my circumstances are similar to SSage's.....However in my case I stll wanted a catholic feel w/ a spiritual spin to it & Fr. Rich fit what we were looking for....he's worth looking into.
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  • Riss91Riss91 member
    Knottie Warrior 1000 Comments 25 Love Its Name Dropper
    edited December 2011
    ditto previous posts.... the Catholic church requires the ceremony to be performed inside a church. You could have your reception outdoors, if you're really wanting the scenery.

    Altima - I'm curious about your situation... who will be signing the Marriage License - the officiant on the day of your reception or the priest?
  • kristinanddankristinanddan member
    2500 Comments Combo Breaker
    edited December 2011
    In Response to <a href="http://forums.theknot.com/Sites/theknot/Pages/Main.aspx/local-wedding-boards_new-york-hudson-valley_roman-catholic-officiant?plckFindPostKey=Cat:Local%20Wedding%20BoardsForum:113Discussion:ff97aeda-ff48-47b2-8aed-bb73b44d4bc2Post:891f0834-ebb4-4882-b137-dd9c5860109f">Re: Roman Catholic Officiant</a>:
    [QUOTE]ditto previous posts.... the Catholic church requires the ceremony to be performed inside a church. You could have your reception outdoors, if you're really wanting the scenery. Altima - I'm curious about your situation... who will be signing the Marriage License - the officiant on the day of your reception or the priest?
    Posted by Riss91[/QUOTE]

    The officant the day of the non-church ceremony signs the certificate - that's the legal marriage. The church ceremony is a convalidation - not the same as a Catholic wedding ceremony.
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  • Riss91Riss91 member
    Knottie Warrior 1000 Comments 25 Love Its Name Dropper
    edited December 2011
    In Response to <a href="http://forums.theknot.com/Sites/theknot/Pages/Main.aspx/local-wedding-boards_new-york-hudson-valley_roman-catholic-officiant?plckFindPostKey=Cat:Local Wedding BoardsForum:113Discussion:ff97aeda-ff48-47b2-8aed-bb73b44d4bc2Post:34cc1f15-8e12-4125-82b2-8b0ece73d8a0">Re: Roman Catholic Officiant</a>:
    [QUOTE]In Response to Re: Roman Catholic Officiant : The officant the day of the non-church ceremony signs the certificate - that's the legal marriage. The church ceremony is a convalidation - not the same as a Catholic wedding ceremony.
    Posted by kristinanddan[/QUOTE]

    Hmm...I guess I just thought that convalidations couldn't be obtained merely for the sake of having an outdoor/outside of the church ceremony. I thought there were more restrictions on when they may be obtained. Weird.
  • kristinanddankristinanddan member
    2500 Comments Combo Breaker
    edited December 2011
    In Response to <a href="http://forums.theknot.com/Sites/theknot/Pages/Main.aspx/local-wedding-boards_new-york-hudson-valley_roman-catholic-officiant?plckFindPostKey=Cat:Local Wedding BoardsForum:113Discussion:ff97aeda-ff48-47b2-8aed-bb73b44d4bc2Post:1a3b2103-2ca9-485f-8e34-a64a74483c4b">Re: Roman Catholic Officiant</a>:
    [QUOTE]In Response to Re: Roman Catholic Officiant : Hmm...I guess I just thought that convalidations couldn't be obtained merely for the sake of having an outdoor/outside of the church ceremony. I thought there were more restrictions on when they may be obtained. Weird.
    Posted by Riss91[/QUOTE]

     I didn't think you could either, but I can't imagine anyone would lie to a priest (who would certainly figure it out when there was no marriage license to sign??) I don't know either.
    imageimageimage
  • edited December 2011
    In Response to <a href="http://forums.theknot.com/Sites/theknot/Pages/Main.aspx/local-wedding-boards_new-york-hudson-valley_roman-catholic-officiant?plckFindPostKey=Cat:Local Wedding BoardsForum:113Discussion:ff97aeda-ff48-47b2-8aed-bb73b44d4bc2Post:f5734a47-cd8f-4579-a914-301b6856866c">Re: Roman Catholic Officiant</a>:
    [QUOTE]That is quite unusual from what Ive seen. . .me and my FI are getting married by an officiant at our venue but <strong>afterwards</strong> are going to go do a separate ceremony in the church so it is recognized by the Catholic Church. Good luck in your search.
    Posted by altimat873[/QUOTE]

    Could it maybe be <strong>before</strong>? I know that people do that. First, the ceremony at church on a day that may have some meaning to the couple (say on a Tuesday) and then that weekend they restate vows in front of a judge (or whomever) at the venue and have the reception there. Are you sure your church doesn't want to see you <strong>before</strong> the venue event?

    That way the marriage is valid in the eyes of the church. And you can have the day for your guests the way you want.

    Check with your church, they may not be aware of you planning to see them after. They may have said before is ok.
  • kristinanddankristinanddan member
    2500 Comments Combo Breaker
    edited December 2011
    In Response to <a href="http://forums.theknot.com/Sites/theknot/Pages/Main.aspx/local-wedding-boards_new-york-hudson-valley_roman-catholic-officiant?plckFindPostKey=Cat:Local%20Wedding%20BoardsForum:113Discussion:ff97aeda-ff48-47b2-8aed-bb73b44d4bc2Post:e6b725bf-8436-4af4-9e60-4dec2249efb3">Re: Roman Catholic Officiant</a>:
    [QUOTE]In Response to Re: Roman Catholic Officiant : Could it maybe be before ? I know that people do that. First, the ceremony at church on a day that may have some meaning to the couple (say on a Tuesday) and then that weekend they restate vows in front of a judge (or whomever) at the venue and have the reception there. Are you sure your church doesn't want to see you before the venue event? That way the marriage is valid in the eyes of the church. And you can have the day for your guests the way you want. Check with your church, they may not be aware of you planning to see them after. They may have said before is ok.
    Posted by TerriandJoe[/QUOTE]

    Convalidations can be after the legal ceremony - either way, the church does not consider you married by the civil ceremony.
    imageimageimage
  • edited December 2011
    In Response to <a href="http://forums.theknot.com/Sites/theknot/Pages/Main.aspx/local-wedding-boards_new-york-hudson-valley_roman-catholic-officiant?plckFindPostKey=Cat:Local Wedding BoardsForum:113Discussion:ff97aeda-ff48-47b2-8aed-bb73b44d4bc2Post:f2136729-6215-4abb-ae72-c57e56fe9562">Re: Roman Catholic Officiant</a>:
    [QUOTE]In Response to Re: Roman Catholic Officiant : Convalidations can be after the legal ceremony - either way, the church does not consider you married by the civil ceremony.
    Posted by kristinanddan[/QUOTE]

    I know. But I thought that in order to have a convalidation you had to having a legitimate reason why you weren't married in the catholic church in the first place. (ie. converted to Catholicism after getting married, spouse had family member who was a pastor in another religion and they performed the ceremony, possibly even deployment reasons, etc. A real reason. Not the "I want to marry at the venue because the view is pretty and / or convenient for guests".)
  • kristinanddankristinanddan member
    2500 Comments Combo Breaker
    edited December 2011
    In Response to <a href="http://forums.theknot.com/Sites/theknot/Pages/Main.aspx/local-wedding-boards_new-york-hudson-valley_roman-catholic-officiant?plckFindPostKey=Cat:Local%20Wedding%20BoardsForum:113Discussion:ff97aeda-ff48-47b2-8aed-bb73b44d4bc2Post:3a639a30-63a4-4c99-857c-0a2c06c197ce">Re: Roman Catholic Officiant</a>:
    [QUOTE]In Response to Re: Roman Catholic Officiant : I know. But I thought that in order to have a convalidation you had to having a legitimate reason why you weren't married in the catholic church in the first place. (ie. converted to Catholicism after getting married, spouse had family member who was a pastor in another religion and they performed the ceremony, possibly even deployment reasons, etc. A real reason. Not the "I want to marry at the venue because the view is pretty and / or convenient for guests".)
    Posted by TerriandJoe[/QUOTE]

    I think I mentioned somewhere I thought that too - maybe it was a different thread on a different board. My understanding of them was that they weren't easy to get.
    imageimageimage
  • edited December 2011
    In Response to <a href="http://forums.theknot.com/Sites/theknot/Pages/Main.aspx/local-wedding-boards_new-york-hudson-valley_roman-catholic-officiant?plckFindPostKey=Cat:Local Wedding BoardsForum:113Discussion:ff97aeda-ff48-47b2-8aed-bb73b44d4bc2Post:6fa3ea58-2078-4589-be29-d5d2dac39b01">Re: Roman Catholic Officiant</a>:
    [QUOTE]In Response to Re: Roman Catholic Officiant : I think I mentioned somewhere I thought that too - maybe it was a different thread on a different board. My understanding of them was that they weren't easy to get.
    Posted by kristinanddan[/QUOTE]

    RE:the convalidations. The girls on the catholic wedding board are experts on this subject! But it usually al falls back on your parish priest and his discretion. But from what I've read on multiple threads, they are not easy to get. PP you might want to go over your wedding week timeline with your priest. Hope it works out!
  • edited December 2011
    Thanks for the info!  We did find a church within a few miles of our reception venue, and we are just going to get married there a little earlier than we had planned.  
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