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Opinion on unity candle?

Vanessa630Vanessa630 member
1000 Comments Fourth Anniversary
in Connecticut
I guess the fact that I'm asking tells me we probably won't do it. I asked FI what he thought of it and he said "what the heck is that?"   Our catholic church allows it but it's something I never considered until reading one of the questions on our ceremony info sheet.  
Just wondering what everyone's experience has been like- reasons you chose to do it or not.

Thanks!
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Re: Opinion on unity candle?

  • swissarmymelodyswissarmymelody
    100 Comments
    edited December 2011
    I never heard of it until my mother-in-law told us how special it was to her on her wedding day. Neither my fiance and I are very religious, but we liked the symbolism of it. However, our ceremony site doesn't allow any candles so that is why we are not doing it.  But we have decided to do the sand ceremony, beginning with our moms pouring the bottom layers (symbolizing everyone who is "supporting" our marriage) and then we will pour two colors on top of that. 
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  • SillyLGooseSillyLGoose
    500 Comments
    edited December 2011
    I haven't talked to FI about it yet but it isn't something I have a burning desire to do. It isn't apart of the catholic ceremony but some churches have made provisions for it. 
    Unless my FI really wants to do it we'll do without. When you think about it, the entire sacrament you are receiving has the same symbolism as the unity candle. 

    I've been to a wedding that had a unity candle and it was beautiful and heart-warming. 
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  • banana468banana468 member
    Knottie Warrior 25000 Comments 500 Love Its 5 Answers
    edited December 2011
    We didn't do it.

    We had a long Nuptial Mass so it wasn't something we wanted to do.  Plus, the Unity Candle has its roots in secular tradition - I think it actually began on a soap opera.
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  • ZoeTheDogZoeTheDog
    1000 Comments
    edited December 2011
    Our full, Catholic mass is going to be too damn long as it is....not wasting anyone's time with a candle or sand. 
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  • jennylove810jennylove810 member
    1000 Comments Combo Breaker
    edited December 2011
    Ditto Banana and Zoe.
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  • SuMmErKuTiESuMmErKuTiE member
    2500 Comments Fourth Anniversary 5 Love Its Combo Breaker
    edited December 2011
    We're having a unity candle ceremony. We are having a relgious ceremony, but it's not a catholic mass. A leader from our church is officiating and we're having a 30 minute ceremony at our venue. We chose to have a unity candle, because we wanted to involve our moms in the ceremony, and I found a beautiful set on clearance on the Davids Bridal website.

    I had no idea that the unity candle's roots were in secular tradition..
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  • MaryKatie3MaryKatie3
    100 Comments
    edited December 2011
    We had a congregational service but we did not use the unity candle as my mother is a staunch feminist and you should not blow out your individual candle when you get married, you should have them all lit, one for each of you and one for you together... hahahaha
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  • Vanessa630Vanessa630 member
    1000 Comments Fourth Anniversary
    edited December 2011
    Thanks for the input ladies!
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  • Karebear852k3Karebear852k3
    1000 Comments
    edited December 2011
    I went to a Catholic ceremony last year (almost 2 years now, yikes) that involved a Unity Candle ceremony as well.  It was very beautiful.

    FI and I aren't getting married in a chruch (JP), but we are going to do a "knot tying" ceremony, which is like the same kind of symbolism of the joining of 2 lives/2 families etc.
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  • SillyLGooseSillyLGoose
    500 Comments
    edited December 2011
    Not quite the same idea as the unity candle, but FI and I would like to have everyone join in the center aisle for the "Our Father". Traditionally, family and guests have a "brides side" and "grooms side." The center aisle is considered the meeting ground where the covenant is made. 
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  • ZoeTheDogZoeTheDog
    1000 Comments
    edited December 2011
    In Response to <a href="http://forums.theknot.com/Sites/theknot/Pages/Main.aspx/local-wedding-boards_connecticut_opinion-unity-candle?plckFindPostKey=Cat:Local Wedding BoardsForum:65Discussion:358bc130-359a-4817-9ec3-015e19a23f35Post:0bbda185-8bec-4997-9d2a-d378975c6ae5">Re: Opinion on unity candle?</a>:
    [QUOTE]We're having a unity candle ceremony. We are having a relgious ceremony, but it's not a catholic mass. A leader from our church is officiating and <strong>we're having a 30 minute ceremony</strong> at our venue. We chose to have a unity candle, because we wanted to involve our moms in the ceremony, and I found a beautiful set on clearance on the Davids Bridal website. I had no idea that the unity candle's roots were in secular tradition..
    Posted by SuMmErKuTiE[/QUOTE]

    Ugh...I'm jealous.  This mass is not my idea. 
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  • Vikki2payVikki2pay member
    Sixth Anniversary 1000 Comments Combo Breaker
    edited December 2011
    Our ceremony was only about 30 minutes with the unity candle.  I like the idea of blending the families together, and we didn't blow out our tapers we kept them lit to symbolize each of us and one family.
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