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SIL wedding drama

temurlangtemurlang member
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in South Asian Weddings
We just got back from India... and it was drama drama drama the whole trip!

SIL had tantrum after tantrum after tantrum.  She fought with everyone over everything including me, DH, ILs, her H, her ILs, and anyone else who came in her path.

When we arrived, we found that she had already taken some of the money DH had transferred to pay for the wedding (surprise, surprise... presumably this paid for her "secret" wedding in Goa).  She had failed to hire a florist, lighting, or a photographer, and so the we had no flowers, lights, or professional photos.  She blamed DH for this because he should have somehow magically done it from the US.

She romped around the house in a t-shirt that said "I love Me" and a crown complaining about all the ways we and ILs had wronged her.

She didn't invite me or MIL to the mehndi, which was probably a good thing for us, because there was apparently more drama there.

I'm happy to report that BIL does not want us to support them.  However, they do expect us to help them come to the US.  For once I'm really glad DH isn't a citizen!
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Re: SIL wedding drama

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    raangoliraangoli
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    Wow. I don't even know what to say to all of that. It's borderline impressive that an adult acts like such a child. How could you, your husband and your in laws have wronged her if you all hosted her wedding events?

    Hopefully your husband puts off becoming a citzen (if he had planned to) so that you don't have to help to bring them over to the US.

    I bet you're glad to be back!
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    temurlangtemurlang member
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    Almost recovered... I actually got pretty sick this time in India.

    We haven't heard from SIL, which is always a relief, although a "thanks for the wedding" would be nice.  But it's only a matter of time before she demands money!

    I'm really starting to think she's a bit nuts after this latest experience because, as you say, how does an adult manage to act like this?

    As far as them coming here, DH told BIL that he will pass his resume on to some people, but honestly I don't think he can qualify for an H1 (he's not an engineer).  Besides the potential financial concerns of having them over here, I find even the thought of it just really stressful.  Imagine that personality on someone who's never cooked or done housework or errands and then coming over here with no friends!
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    SonaliPopSonaliPop member
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    I think you guys really need to take a step back from the rest of your husband's family for a while, if only for the sake of your sanity and the happiness of your marriage. You're a great and supportive person for putting up with what you do, but there has to be a limit. You should enjoy spending your money the way you want it and you deserve to be drama free for a while.
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    jsleikjsleik
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    Welcome home!!  I know this whole ordeal has been so stressful for you, but now it is over!!  And she is not your responsibility any more!!  You may want to consider having your in-laws make sure she can't access bank accounts anymore, or that might not be the case.  She sounds like such a piece of work! 

    I agree with Sonali - take a break from his family for a little bit.  Enjoy each other.  Enjoy having your time and money to yourselves for a bit.  Recharge your batteries! 

    As for them moving to the US, that's nice of your H to pass along the BIL's resume, but sounds like that isn't going to happen too soon.  Hopefully if they do come to the US, they'll find themselves on the opposite side of the country! :-)
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    temurlangtemurlang member
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    sonali and jsleik -- we are still working on cutting her loose!  Happily, we now rarely hear a peep from her, which does mean a more relaxing life for us.  DH is in the process of hiring someone in India to "advise" FIL on finances.  FIL is very resistant to this, but DH wants a report of what his money gets used for.  I think it will really help!

    Unfortunately, if SIL and BIL ever do move to the US, it would be California because BIL is an animator.  However, there are only one or two companies that do that up here and we are a 6-hour drive from LA!
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