June 2012 Weddings

NWR - "The Man Rules"

Thought I'd take a minute and pass this on (my Dad sent it to me this morning) in the hopes that it may help explain why some of your grooms do the things they do (I know I found it helpful!)

 

The Man Rules

At last a guy has taken the time to write this all down

 

 Finally, the guys' side of the story.
(
 I must admit, it's pretty good.) 
We always hear
 'the rules'
From the female side
 

 


 

 

    Now here are the rules from the male side  

 

These are our rules!
Please note.. these are all numbered #1 ON PURPOSE!

 

 

1.   Men are NOT mind readers.

1. Learn to work the toilet seat.
  You're a big girl. If it's up, put it down.
We need it up, you need it down.
  You don't hear us complaining about you leaving it down.

 

1. Crying is blackmail.

1. Ask for what you want.
  Let us be clear on this one: 
Subtle hints do not work!
Strong hints do not work!
Obvious hints do not work!
Just say it!

1. Yes and No are perfectly acceptable answers to almost every question.

1.. Come to us with a problem 
only if you want help solving it. That's what we do. Sympathy is what your girlfriends are  for.

1. Anything we said 6 months ago is inadmissible in an argument.
In fact, all comments become null and void after 7 Days. 

1. If you think you're fat, you probably are.
  Don't ask us..

1. If something we said can be interpreted two ways and one of the ways makes you sad or angry, we meant the
  other one 

1. You can either ask us to do something
 or tell us how you want it done.   Not both.
If you already know best how to do it, just do it yourself.

1. Whenever possible, Please say whatever you have to say during commercials.

1. Christopher Columbus did 
NOT need directions and neither do we...

1. ALL men see in only 16 colors, like Windows default settings..
Peach, for example, is a fruit, not A 
color. Pumpkin is also a fruit. We have no idea what mauve is.

1. If we ask what is wrong and you say 'nothing,' We will act like nothing's wrong
.  We know you are lying, but it is just not worth the hassle.

1. If you ask a question you don't want an answer to, Expect an answer you don't want to hear..

1. When we have to go somewhere, absolutely anything you wear is fine...
REALLY

1.. Don't ask us what we're thinking about unless you are prepared to discuss such topics as baseball or
 motor sports.


1. You have enough clothes.

1 .. You have too many shoes.

1. I am in shape.  
Round IS a shape!

1.. Thank you for reading this.
 Yes, I know, I have to sleep on the couch tonight.. But did you know men really don't mind that? It's like camping...

Pass this to as many men as you can -
  to give them a laugh... 

Pass this to as many women as you can -
 to give them a bigger laugh, because its true!

 

 


June 2012 August Siggy Challenge: Favourite Pro Pic (I couldn't choose just one!)
imageDaisypath Vacation tickers Daisypath Vacation tickers Follow Me on Pinterest

Re: NWR - "The Man Rules"

  • hahahhahahha!!!
    Warning No formatter is installed for the format bbhtml
  • Hehe I just emailed this to my peeps. Mom thinks it's funny enough to cross stich and hang up in our house somewhere.
  • "If you think you're fat you probably are, don't ask us." LOL 
  • The toilet seat still bothers me. I don't want to see the inside of a toilet everytime I'm in/walk by the bathroom

    Wedding Countdown Ticker
  • edited March 2012
    LOL very funny.

    I'm just glad my FI isn't like that.  He realy does care.  Or at least, he PRETENDS to....that's probably more accurate.

    And I've learned to not talk to him AT ALL when he's watching tv.  he doesn't Listen.
    Anniversary
  • I read these earlier, and they're hilarious
  • Here they are again since TK ate the original post....

    The Man Rules
    At last a guy has taken the time to write this all down

     

     Finally, the guys' side of the story.
    (
     I must admit, it's pretty good.) 
    We always hear
     'the rules'
    From the female side
     


     

      Now here are the rules from the male side  

     

    These are our rules!
    Please note.. these are all numbered #1 ON PURPOSE!

     

     

    1.   Men are NOT mind readers.

    1. Learn to work the toilet seat.
      You're a big girl. If it's up, put it down.
    We need it up, you need it down.
      You don't hear us complaining about you leaving it down.

     

    1. Crying is blackmail.

    1. Ask for what you want.
      Let us be clear on this one: 
    Subtle hints do not work!
    Strong hints do not work!
    Obvious hints do not work!
    Just say it!

    1. Yes and No are perfectly acceptable answers to almost every question.

    1.. Come to us with a problem 
    only if you want help solving it. That's what we do. Sympathy is what your girlfriends are  for.

    1. Anything we said 6 months ago is inadmissible in an argument.
    In fact, all comments become null and void after 7 Days. 

    1. If you think you're fat, you probably are.
      Don't ask us..

    1. If something we said can be interpreted two ways and one of the ways makes you sad or angry, we meant the
      other one 

    1. You can either ask us to do something
     or tell us how you want it done.   Not both.
    If you already know best how to do it, just do it yourself.

    1. Whenever possible, Please say whatever you have to say during commercials.

    1. Christopher Columbus did 
    NOT need directions and neither do we...

    1. ALL men see in only 16 colors, like Windows default settings..
    Peach, for example, is a fruit, not A 
    color. Pumpkin is also a fruit. We have no idea what mauve is.

    1. If we ask what is wrong and you say 'nothing,' We will act like nothing's wrong
    .  We know you are lying, but it is just not worth the hassle.

    1. If you ask a question you don't want an answer to, Expect an answer you don't want to hear..

    1. When we have to go somewhere, absolutely anything you wear is fine...
    REALLY

    1.. Don't ask us what we're thinking about unless you are prepared to discuss such topics as baseball or
     motor sports.


    1. You have enough clothes.

    1 .. You have too many shoes.

    1. I am in shape.  
    Round IS a shape!

    1.. Thank you for reading this.
     Yes, I know, I have to sleep on the couch tonight.. But did you know men really don't mind that? It's like camping...

    Pass this to as many men as you can -
      to give them a laugh... 

    Pass this to as many women as you can -
     to give them a bigger laugh, because its true!

     


    June 2012 August Siggy Challenge: Favourite Pro Pic (I couldn't choose just one!)
    imageDaisypath Vacation tickers Daisypath Vacation tickers Follow Me on Pinterest
  • 1. If something we said can be interpreted two ways and one of the ways makes you sad or angry, we meant the  other one



    I am so guilty of this one. When I showed the list to FI, he said, "See! See! This is what I keep saying!"
  • I disagree with the color one..FI pulls "persimmon" and "charmuse or chartruse (I don't remember)" on me all the time and I have no idea what those colors are haha.
    June 16, 2012
    image
  • melntaittmelntaitt member
    Fifth Anniversary 1000 Comments Combo Breaker
    edited March 2012

     1. Christopher Columbus did NOT need directions and neither do we...

    Well I call bullshit on that one buddy...one too many suspicious right turns in the wrong neighborhood and you're getting my input...
     
    Vacation White Knot
  • LOL. Love it! Thanks for sharing
  • In Response to <a href="http://forums.theknot.com/Sites/theknot/Pages/Main.aspx/wedding-club-boards_june-2012-weddings_nwr-the-man-rules?plckFindPostKey=Cat:Wedding%20Club%20BoardsForum:3ae4d68d-f10a-4dec-8810-da13c14a7b86Discussion:d21dd4b6-7a86-4994-aa6b-0bb18661e974Post:ee9f0024-70e4-4c3e-85d4-b0fa939720dc">Re: NWR - "The Man Rules"</a>:
    [QUOTE]I disagree with the color one..FI pulls "persimmon" and "charmuse or chartruse (I don't remember)" on me all the time and I have no idea what those colors are haha.
    Posted by acaponi87[/QUOTE]

    Me too.  Sometimes I think my FI knows more colors than I do.  Then again, his dad paints and he used to.
    image
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