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How to include the kids in a small wedding?

[Deleted User][Deleted User]
100 Comments
in Second Weddings
I can't figure out where else to put this question so I'm gonna ask here.
A little background.  FI and I were both married once before, I have 6 children, he has 2.  We are having a small wedding--read:no wedding party.  We want to include the kids, but not interested in a unity candle or sand ceremony.
Does anyone have any ideas on how to include the kids without having them in the wedding or doing the above mentioned ceremonies? 
At this point all we can come up with is having them greet the guests when they come in and help some folks get settled and then have the officiant announce us as husband and wife and then as a family.
Thanks in advance for all your help!
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Re: How to include the kids in a small wedding?

  • MikesAngieMikesAngie member
    1000 Comments Third Anniversary Name Dropper 5 Love Its
    edited December 2011

    Without knowing the ages of the children it's hard to give you a lot of ideas. If they are old enough you can ask them what they would like perhaps doing a reading as a group or having their names mentioned during your ring exchange. Something like "not only do the rings presented here act as a symbol of the unity of husband and wife but this also unties the children (their names stated) and creates a new family.

    You could also have them be ushers and usherettes - which would mean that they would help get people situated before they take their seats. 

    Whatever you decide is right for your family I would hope that you would talk to the children about what they want to do or are comfortable with.

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  • [Deleted User][Deleted User]
    100 Comments
    edited December 2011

    The kids range in age from 14 to 4.  I haven't asked them what they would like to do, if anything, yet because I wanted to have an idea of what we would be comfortable with for our ceremony before I went there.  And on top of that, my kids haven't been to any weddings that they would remember, so I doubt they'd really know what typically goes on at a wedding and what job is assigned to each person.  Heck, come to think of it...I don't really know either...so I suppose we'll just wing it like everything else we're doing.

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  • 2dBride2dBride member
    2500 Comments Fourth Anniversary 5 Love Its Combo Breaker
    edited December 2011
    At least the older ones could probably do a reading together.
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  • sharonh10sharonh10
    10 Comments
    edited December 2011
    Not sure what type ceremony you are having but I am a Christian minister and in our Book of Worship there is part of the ceremony that ask questions to the bride, groom, and children the union also creating this family.  You could ask your officiant about including them in the service that way.

    I am getting married in February and we have adult childrena and am trying to figure out that dynamic.  I have three sons, two daughter-in-laws, and he has a daughter.  I hope to figure it out soon!

       












































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  • mom2tomanymom2tomany
    First Comment
    edited December 2011
    I've got 5 and my fiance has 3 ranging in age from 22 to 9. We are going to do unity sand. I found a cute reading for family unity sand that we're going to have read.

    About halfway down the page is a reading for Bride, Groom, and Children.
    http://www.celebrateintimateweddings.com/ceremonysand.html

    If you don't want to do something like that talk to your older kids and see what they would be interested in doing.
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  • miriamhawsmiriamhaws member
    First Comment
    edited December 2011
    My FI and I have % kids between us ranging in ages 7-4. We're planning on having a small wedding as well, and the wedding party will be our children. His eldest son is walking my down the aisle. The two youngest girls as flowerfirls. Then the other two as ringbearers(sp?) keeps things small and simple and makes them feel involved.
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  • saorisenylsaorisenyl member
    100 Comments
    edited December 2011

    I have a 17 and 11 year old.

    Asked them what if anything would they like to do... the 17 year old was all wide eyed and shaking his head like NO WAY.  He does not want to do anything... (maybe its the age).  I did ask him to give me away and he smiled and was genuinely happy that I asked, he just asked if he could sit down immediately afterwards lol.

    The 11 year old... said he knows he's a little old but for the 6 years FI and I have been dating he has been dreaming of being the ring bearer... how could I say no.
    So one's walking me and one's carrying the rings. 

    When asked if they would want to say/read anything they said "HECK NO".  lol

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  • heidirobbinsheidirobbins member
    10 Comments
    edited December 2011
    If having a reception, could have each child introduced as they enter before you come in. I did this at my wedding with each wedding party member and my new step son, we said something unique and sweet about each person. Everyone really enjoyed this.
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