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Pre Wedding Party instead of Rehearsal Dinner?

tychandlertychandler member
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in Pre-wedding Parties
We will have a lot of out of town guests coming to our wedding.  Many have never been to NY before, so my fiance and I thought this would be a great opportunity for us to show them a good time in the city and for both families to meet.  We are not having an engagment party since our families live so far a part.  I don't think I want a shower, because I really don't want gifts.  If I do one, maybe something small with friends and family like a tea or lunch.  I know the Rehearsal dinner is normally reserved for the wedding party and immediate family, but we thought it would be cool to invite all of our guests to a cocktail party the Friday or Thursday before our wedding, which is on a Satuday.  Again most of our family and friends will be meeting the first time, why not do it in a more informal setting than waiting for the wedding and make it more special for those traveling.  Some of my BMs don't see the point of this other party, they think it will take away from the wedding itself, and that the rehearsal dinner should be just the wedding party and immediate family.  But are there really any rules? 
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Re: Pre Wedding Party instead of Rehearsal Dinner?

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    banana468banana468 member
    First Answer First Anniversary 5 Love Its First Comment
    edited December 2011
    As long as you're paying for the function, it sounds like a great time.

    BTW, this is off topic but could you shrink your siggy pic?  I'm on an iMac with a huge screen and I can still only see your one post on it.
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    quotequeenquotequeen member
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    edited December 2011
    It's actually pretty common for people to invite OOT guests to the rehearsal dinner.  The only rule is that if you have a rehearsal, you need to feed the people involved and their SOs.  You can invite as many or as few other people as you like.
    Married 10/2/10
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    vsgalvsgal member
    First Anniversary 5 Love Its Name Dropper First Comment
    edited December 2011
    As long as you are feeding them and paying for the party, you can invite whomever you want.  There is no concrete rule that only wedding party members go to the dinner.  The general rule is that the wedding party and their significant others should be feed  after the rehersal.  If you want to include you OOT's, that is fine as well.
    ROCK IS KING!!
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    kwumdkwumd member
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    edited December 2011
    I personally love this idea and am thinking of doing something like it as well. Maybe do something pretty casual to keep costs down and support mingling?
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    marisah83marisah83 member
    First Comment
    edited December 2011
    We're having a BBQ the day before for the immediate family, wedding party, and OOT guests.  We're having a small wedding with just a MOH and Best Man, so we didn't want to plan a regular rehearsal dinner.  We expect maybe 25 people to come to the BBQ, and we figured it would be a fun way for everyone to relax and to give OOT guests something to do.
    09.10 Siggy Challenge
    PhotobucketMy favorite picture is of the night we got engaged!
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