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May 2012 Weddings
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I mean seriously...

norweigannorweigan member
100 Comments
in May 2012 Weddings
So last night I ran into one of my fiance's friends who hasn't rsvped yet. He hasn't gone to any of our wedding parties (even our engagement party when he told my fiance he was on his way... never came). So I asked him last night if he was coming and he said he wasn't sure yet and was going to call my fiance a few days before and let him know if he can make it...
SERIOUSLY! which is what I wanted to say but I kept it cool... also wanted to say 'then I'll put you down as a no' but I held back...
he is one of my fiance's friends since high school but he is pissing me off, especially since I think it hurts my fiance's feelings that he is being so flakey
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Re: I mean seriously...

  • caitlinc09caitlinc09
    500 Comments
    Guys can be so clueless. I would react the exact same way. Ugh :( sorry you guys are dealing with a flake. 
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  • vineyard12vineyard12
    500 Comments
    I don't understand why people think they can wait until the last minute to say yes or no. I mean, if you don't know now, then I would just say no. I noticed a number of women here having this same issue. Personally, I would tell them "I'm sorry but we need a final head count by x date" and stick with it. If you don't hear from them, I would say they are a no. Each person costs money, and I don't think people get that. I would be pissed if I spent $100 on meal for someone and they didn't show, or if they did show up without RSVPing, you wouldn't have enough food or even a place for them to sit!

    People are just rude.
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  • levanlaerelevanlaere
    100 Comments
    I would put him as a no and if (which I doubt) he shows up, I would just say sorry, you didn't rsvp.

    I know my head count & balance is due 15 days before the wedding so I understand the pressure of getting all the rsvps back.
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  • toothpastechicatoothpastechica member
    1000 Comments
    I agree with pp, get your FI to contact him and say, if we dont have an answer by x day (the end of the weekend, the end of the week, tomorrow-whatever you are comforable with), we are marking you as a no and not reserving space/food for you. Period end of story.

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  • mandi921vhmandi921vh member
    Eighth Anniversary 2500 Comments Combo Breaker
    I would just have your FI contact him around the time your caterer needs final head count and explain that he needs to know then. Guys have no idea what goes into wedding planning, or how wedding stuff works.
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  • Killa2979Killa2979
    500 Comments
    In Response to <a href="http://forums.theknot.com/Sites/theknot/Pages/Main.aspx/wedding-club-boards_may-2012-weddings_i-mean-seriously?plckFindPostKey=Cat:Wedding%20Club%20BoardsForum:f0ca0bc1-9255-4120-8042-b40e7f3e99c5Discussion:4f91190d-33c2-4565-85de-61867dd6fcc8Post:ab01973e-67ff-4fc0-a08b-d287bf71200b">Re: I mean seriously...</a>:
    [QUOTE]I would just have your FI contact him around the time your caterer needs final head count and explain that he needs to know then. Guys have no idea what goes into wedding planning, or how wedding stuff works.
    Posted by mandi921vh[/QUOTE]

    <div>This.</div>
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  • classykat22classykat22
    500 Comments
    From someone who took a chance and included someone I hadn't heard back from...please please please...just put him down as a no.  We included someone I had tried to get in touch with, left a message, sent e-mail, heard nothing back.  I had talked to her several times though and every conversation led me to believe she was coming.  My final count is in to our venue, can't change anything, and I just received her card in the mail this week with a decline.  

    It's frutstrating because I could have saved that money and it's going to be hard for me not to show my frustration the next time I talk with her.  I would have felt better if I had not counted her, and dealt with things if she had actually RSVP'd yes.  

    I have to say...this aspect of the planning was one of the most stressful for me and I am still dealing with it even though my deadline has passed.  ARGH!!!!!  Foot in mouth
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  • kitkatbubbliciouskitkatbubblicious
    100 Comments
    What a lame-o. I do think it's interesting that most women will RSVP as soon as they can, but men will procrastinate until you pull your hair out. 

    I'm sorry to hear you're going through this, and I agree with pp, that you should have your FI call him up and ask him directly, since he doesn't feel comfortable giving you a straight answer!
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  • jeja234jeja234 member
    10 Comments

    People in general are just oblivious to the money and energy that goes into planning a wedding. If FH cannot get an straight answer from him by XX date then  I would put those him as a NO, that is what I am doing with those type of people because I would hate to pay $150 for a plate and have that person not show up. Anyone who is wishy washy or dsnt send a RSVP is a no on our list. They can be embarrassed at the wedding when there is no seat for them.

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