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September 2013 Weddings
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Ughhh! Vent! Need Opinions Plz

fperez7542fperez7542
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in September 2013 Weddings
We wanted a small wedding about 50 guests or less. We are at about 75-80 now and it keeps growing, with his parents inviting people verbally and my parents asking how about your this person, I'm honestly loosing my mind! 

So my old rommate, posted on FB that she hopes to get her invite...Not ONCE! but TWO TIMES...I feel obligated because I feel bad...I wasn't planning on inviting her because we don't talk, we only talk when our daughters have their birthday.

We are paying everything ourselves, though his parents and mine will be helping there are no amounts or dates when so we are not counting on it.  Our motto was if we haven't spoken to you, seen you, or been in touch some how in the last 2 years then you are not invited.  I just didn't think to invite this friend though I do speak to her a few times a year.

What to do? I feel bad, please advice.
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Re: Ughhh! Vent! Need Opinions Plz

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    Angelface225Angelface225 member
    First Anniversary 5 Love Its Name Dropper First Comment
    Hold strong. Keep saying "unfortunately we're not going to be able to invite everyone we would like to, it's just not in our budget". And put your foot down with family too, I had to tell my FFIL no cousins b'c every table (of 8) is another $400 on my catering budget. People will respect you for being upfront and honest.

     

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    mpicklmpickl member
    First Anniversary Name Dropper First Comment
    Keep it light. Tell her you guys are keeping the wedding small and mostly family is invited. Sounds like you also need to put your foot down with the parents. Tough situation, but so would going into debt because you didn't speak up!
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    FUTUREMSWITHERSPOONFUTUREMSWITHERSPOON
    First Comment First Anniversary
    say you already paid your catering for a certain amount within your budget. people have to respect that. All that matters is you two feeling like everyone dearest to you are included.
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    LindsayganinLindsayganin
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    I had a really similar issue. The day that I got engaged a friend of mine said 'Id better be invited!' She hadn't spoken to me for 6 months! I told her 'unfortunately, we're keeping it pretty small because we're paying for it ourselves and my fiancée has a really big family'. She didn't speak to me again for another 3 months after that. But you know what they say, a real friend will understand. If they don't, then they're not worth being friends with
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    mysticfishtalesmysticfishtales
    First Comment First Anniversary
    We are starting to run into the same thing. People we haven't spoken to in 1-2 years are practially inviting themselves. I have used "We are going to keep it small" but I don't think the message registered. FI wants to invite every person he has ever met and out list keeps expanding every week. Currently we are at 110 people. Good luck.
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