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Military Brides

maid of honor is going to Iraq

I am not a military bride but I did not know where else to post this question.

My maid of honor is my cousin and best friend since we were born. She just found out a week ago that she has to go to Iraq and will not be here for my wedding. We are both beyond devastated by this. I already have a date set and my dress and there is just no possible way I can change the date now.

I wanted to do something at the wedding to recognize her on my special day and for her serving our country but I need some help with ideas??? She went to Afghanistan last year for 6 months so this is not her first time going over there.

Does anyone have any cool ideas I could possibly do in her honor?

Re: maid of honor is going to Iraq

  • kara811kara811 member
    2500 Comments Third Anniversary
    edited December 2011
    I know you didn't mention it, but don't try to replace her, have her listed on your programs as your MOH still. Or you can always dedicate a section of the program to her. Something like, although she couldn't be there, you are proud of having her as your MOH and are even more proud of her for serving the country. Will it be possible to have her on skype or on the phone during the reception? That might be  cool too. 
  • kyrgyzstankyrgyzstan member
    Eighth Anniversary 1000 Comments 100 Love Its Name Dropper
    edited December 2011
    See if she'll record her speech before she goes and play it at the reception whenver she would have already given her toast. Have another BM help with the logistics so you don't see it first.
    I hate Dave Ramsey
  • Sammy0709Sammy0709 member
    Fifth Anniversary 500 Comments 25 Love Its
    edited December 2011
    It might be cool to have her Skype a toast if possible.  I'm sure that would be a challenge with the way things are over there and never knowing when you will be able to communicate but it might be do-able.
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  • edited December 2011
    Like Kara said, don't replace her. Leave where she would have stood open. Put a note in the program about her. Have her record a video and email it to another BM, or your FI or whoever and play it at the reception. I know everyone else said basically that too.

    I had dated a guy throughout HS, and he was deployed for my 17th birthday party, and he recorded a video and had my parents play it at my party. It was really sweet. Good Luck!!
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  • edited December 2011
    Idk if I would play the video at the WEDDING.... maybe at the RD, but I love the idea of not replacing her and putting a note in the program!
    I'm sorry that the military is being a pain for your wedding and your MOH :/ awful timing. You should send her a care package while she is out there either before or after the wedding, to let her know that you miss her and are thinking of her during your time. :)
  • kyrgyzstankyrgyzstan member
    Eighth Anniversary 1000 Comments 100 Love Its Name Dropper
    edited December 2011
    In Response to <a href="http://forums.theknot.com/Sites/theknot/Pages/Main.aspx/special-topic-wedding-boards_military-brides_maid-of-honor-going-iraq?plckFindPostKey=Cat:Special%20Topic%20Wedding%20BoardsForum:13Discussion:34f613b3-853a-4775-b84c-3df32ce364c1Post:43e7e108-ae23-48a3-a28e-d828733032b6">Re: maid of honor is going to Iraq</a>:
    [QUOTE]Idk if I would play the video at the WEDDING.... maybe at the RD
    Posted by firsttimersluck[/QUOTE]

    <div>Why not? She's the MOH, she'd be giving her toast at the wedding reception anyway, right?</div>
    I hate Dave Ramsey
  • edited December 2011
    I actually like the idea of watching at the RD instead of the wedding. I am going to be sooooo freaking emotional since she will not be there with me that seeing and hearing her on that day will make me lose it.

    I thought maybe I could watch it for the first time at the RD and get all the tears out, because I know that will happen, and then maybe play it at the wedding so everyone can hear it. That way, at the wedding I will have already heard it so maybe I'll be able to keep the tears down to a minimum.

    thanks for the advice!!!
  • edited December 2011
    Eh... Idk.. just because a lot of people don't like videos at weddings. it's hard to get everyone to pay attention to a video, rather than a person. I think it would just depend on the audience. I would think it was sweet, but not everyone is sensitive to that kinda stuff.
    That's all that comment was meant for, I think it just depends on how big the wedding is, how many people know the person, etc... Because if only the bride knows this person and it's a LARGE wedding, I could see a lot of people being disrespectful about it, ya know?
  • edited December 2011
    Totally understand that.

    She is my cousin and pretty much 90% of the people know her and I think they would really like to see/hear her speech.
  • edited December 2011
    aw, that's right I forget. Well then totally your call. I like the idea of the video if SHE likes the idea of it, maybe even ask her if she would prefer it begin shown at the RD or the wedding. :)
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