Seating of honored guests?

AurorasEnvy · February 2012

So I know it is common at weddings to start the ceremony with the seating of honored guests - moms, grandmas, etc.

I guess I am a little confused as to how to do this. A few questions -

1) I am having my cousins (middle school aged) as our "ushers" - they really won't be seating guests unless they need help walking, just handing out programs. Are they the ones who seat the "honored guests?" Or do the honored guests seat themselves?

2) What constitutes as "honored guest" typically? My dad will be walking me down the aisle, and my brother/FSIL are in the wedding party already. But that leaves -

a) my mom

b) my grandmother, who doesn't walk well and will probably be seated beforehand

c) FI's mom and her boyfriend (only been dating 1.5 years or so)

d) FI's dad, his wife, and their 2 girls (middle school age)

e) FI's grandma

I don't think men should be escorted by other men. Also, I'm not a huge fan of ceremonies where there are like 15 people who need to be "seated" before the ceremony. Is it okay to have the 1-2 grandmothers (probably escorted by one of my usher cousins), my mom (escorted by my other usher cousin), FI's mom escorted by her boyfriend, and FI's dad escorted by his wife (and leave the 2 girls out? I've never really seen children as part of this part of the wedding...)

What do you girls think? What you are doing?

mdoyle1217 · February 2012

I am going to have our honored guests seated either by their spouse/sig other or by one of the groomsmen. I think a middle school aged boy (I have a son who's 10..so close in age) will not be mature enough to help an elderly person down the aisle and help them sit. I could be wrong, but you might just want to keep their duties limited to handing out programs. Usually the woman is escorted by a groomsman/usher and the husband and children (if any) follow behind. I am just going to have my dad walk by himself (my stepmom isn't coming) and my stepdad will escort my mom. FI's cousin (GM) will escort FI's g-ma and his g-pa will follow (only because their are elderly and probably couldn't support each other if one fell). I hope that helps. I don't know if there are any steadfast rules (I'm sure there are if you ask the E board) but do whatever works best for you.

mandi921vh · February 2012

I think typically the ushers would escort grandmothers and the grandfathers walk behind the ushers. But I do not like this idea at all!

We are going to have my mimi and papa walk together, then FI's meme and pepe, then FI's grammie and her husband, FI's grandfather might not attend the wedding but if he does I can see him not wanting to be seated like this. Then FMIL and FFIL will walk down together then my brother (also GM) will escort my mom. Then the ring bearer, BMs, MOH, then me and my dad.

pantherRN · February 2012

FI's gma is being seated by the best man (her grandson). My grandparents are walking together. FMIL is being escorted by FFIL. My mom is being escorted by my two cousins. I'm not really sure what to do with my stepmom. My two options are to have her escorted by my dad and then have my dad come back with me or have her escorted by a GM or have one of my male cousins on my Dad's side escort her. As for the two girls, I would have then walk behind their parents.

mandydc0509 · February 2012

I think having the honored guests walked with their SO is fine. I wouldn't include the kids though. If FI's grandmother can walk relatively well, I don't see the problem with having an usher escort her.

We're having the ushers escort our moms, and my grandfather will probably sit before the service begins.

kimberlykh · February 2012

Usually the honored guests are seated by someone significant to them. But, obviously there are no rules.
If I were you, I'd have your brother escort your mom down the aisle and then join the bridal party. And then have his parents escort each other in. Personally, I would have his two half sisters walk behind their parents. As for the grandmas, is there a grandson or other adult that could walk with them?

mancila60 · February 2012

Here is what we are doing. 3 honored guests - close family friends of FI who have done a lot for us and our wedding not to mention him growing up FMIL FFIL and his wife My mom My stepdad My dad who is walking me down the aisle My stepmom His grandma My grandparents Typically the men walk behind the women who are seated with ushers or GM. Honored guests will be identified with flowers different from the WP and family. Then grandmas will be seated by GM while grandfathers walk behind same thing with the mothers. My mother will be seated with my stepdad walking behind. And same for FI's stepmom his dad will walk behind them.

toothpastechica · February 2012

only one of either of my or my FI's grandparents is alive, she will have a seat reserved for her in the front row, same with my inlaws, and my parents. (I am still iffy on dad giving me away since im not close to him...am way closer to my mom, and dont really like the significance of the whole thing, but know he would be heartbroken if I came out and said I dont want him to walk me down the aisle....so still trying to figure this one out!). As much as they are significant to us, we would rather draw attention to them with a nice thank you speech in the reception, then making a big deal about how they sit down. (Not to mention they will probably want to sit long before the ceremony starts and the church is way to small to want to be walking back and forth much!)

bpphoto785 · February 2012

My brothers will escort my Mom and FMIL & FFIL will walk in together. My Grandpa will not walk in only because it has problems walking so it will be easier and more comfortable for him to be seated.

I would suggest having your brother walk your mom, FMIL & her boyfriend walk together and FFIL & his wife walk together, their girls do not need to be part of the processional. For FI's grandma you can have her seated beforehand as you're doing with your grandma or have a male relative or an groomsman escort her.

Seating of honored guests?

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