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NWR: Um, wtfbbq? x 2

So last week on WP Tuesday I mentioned getting an address request for another friend's second baby shower when the new baby's gender is a "surprise".

I also mentioned in another thread last week that I haven't not been in any real contaact with BSC friend since I sent them the "Thank You" card for attending the wedding.

I'm going through today's mail, and I discover an invite to not only first friend's baby shower ... but also a shower invite for BSC friend's second baby! Granted, BSC friend did find out the gender, and "new" baby is a boy (Their 3 year old is a girl). But both invites contain registry information. I just checked out both of their registries (I was very curious) ... and the both of them registered at 2 different stores as if they didn't have another kid: Cribs, car seats, Pack 'n Plays, the whole nine yards.

With first friend I was debating just sending a Babies 'R Us giftcard ... (and this could just be the fact that I haven't had dinner yet and I'm hella grouchy) but now I'm just kind of annoyed that 2 people had the nerve to create 2 seperate full baby registries for their second child that I just kind of want to pretend I didn't receive either invite.

Grrrrrrrr Yell


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"Meg cracks me up on the regular. Now she gets to do it in two different forums. Yay!!" ~mkrupar

Re: NWR: Um, wtfbbq? x 2

  • Just buy them diapers and call it a day :)
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  • In Response to <a href="http://forums.theknot.com/Sites/theknot/Pages/Main.aspx/wedding-boards_wedding-party_nwr-um-wtfbbq-x-2?plckFindPostKey=Cat:Wedding BoardsForum:37Discussion:6a2afa55-4923-43ac-99c6-977b7fdd5c0ePost:050897bd-7305-483f-9dee-049049e4b818">Re: NWR: Um, wtfbbq? x 2</a>:
    [QUOTE]Just buy them diapers and call it a day :)
    Posted by tidetravel[/QUOTE]

    Yep.
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  • I've never heard of soneone having a shower for a 2nd child unless it was a giant length of time since the first child.  Like a family member of mine who had a 2nd child with her new husband when her daughter from the 1st marriage was 15 - clearly has no crib or anything anymore, and if she did it would have been way outdated. 

    I would get each a small gift gift, like diapers, or a gift card for like $20 to Babies R Us. or just decline each shower and send no gift to either.
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  • I think you could send them diapers and an etiquette book.
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  • megk8ozmegk8oz member
    First Comment
    edited August 2010
    Now,that I've had dinner (And have become decidedly less grouchy, lol), I'm definitely decliningto go to either, but I think I'm still going to go with the Babies 'R Us gift card for the "surprise" baby, since I actually do consider the mother a friend.

    However, BSC friend, if she gets anything, I'm going the diaper route. And I'm still having a major internal debate on that one.

    If you fire a WP member, you're against America.
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    "Meg cracks me up on the regular. Now she gets to do it in two different forums. Yay!!" ~mkrupar
  • You could always give BSC friend a diaper with something in it....
  • In Response to <a href="http://forums.theknot.com/Sites/theknot/Pages/Main.aspx/wedding-boards_wedding-party_nwr-um-wtfbbq-x-2?plckFindPostKey=Cat:Wedding%20BoardsForum:37Discussion:6a2afa55-4923-43ac-99c6-977b7fdd5c0ePost:0064984e-c749-4c66-8b54-948961e5e4ea">Re: NWR: Um, wtfbbq? x 2</a>:
    [QUOTE]You could always give BSC friend a diaper with something in it....
    Posted by banana468[/QUOTE]

    I'm not sure what the best part of this is: the actual advice or that it came from Banana <img src="http://cdn.cl9.vanillaforums.com/downloaded/ver1.0/content/scripts/tinymce/plugins/emotions/images/smiley-laughing.gif" border="0" alt="Laughing" title="Laughing" />

    If you fire a WP member, you're against America.
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    "Meg cracks me up on the regular. Now she gets to do it in two different forums. Yay!!" ~mkrupar
  • So you're bugged that she has a registry for her second kid?
    I never understood this. First, if someone else is throwing them a second baby shower, then that is proper etiquette. Second, if you don't make a registry, then everyone and there mother is calling to find out what to bring to the shower so you're darned if you do and darned if you don't. Third, before you judge for asking for a new pack n play etc, I'd like you to google  infant product recalls. There are thousands of baby toys/ stuff recalled yearly, and honestly the stuff made today just doesn't keep like old stuff. It's also very common to have a second shower for a new gender, since it is extremely hard to buy gender neutral everything.

    Now I may just be sensitive because I had 2 baby showers, neither were thrown by me or my parents, I even had 2 girls so have plenty of stuff, but the hosts wanted me to make registries for the guests and the excited grandparents also wanted us to make them so they could shop without us. Not to mention that if you make one, whatever isn't bought before your baby is born (or your shower), the store sends you coupons to buy the rest.

    Just some food for thought, not every situation is so completely black and white. If you are going to be so harsh and judgmental to a "friend", maybe you should just cut your ties.


  • Yeah Meg, blow off the BSC friend's shower.  I don't think you should feel bad about that at all.  For the first friend, I think a GC is fine.

    Although I do love Banana's suggestion!
  • In Response to <a href="http://forums.theknot.com/Sites/theknot/Pages/Main.aspx/wedding-boards_wedding-party_nwr-um-wtfbbq-x-2?plckFindPostKey=Cat:Wedding%20BoardsForum:37Discussion:6a2afa55-4923-43ac-99c6-977b7fdd5c0ePost:562b06b6-da0b-4fca-b6f3-5450c8a6f2a5">Re: NWR: Um, wtfbbq? x 2</a>:
    [QUOTE]So you're bugged that she has a registry for her second kid? I never understood this. <strong>First, if someone else is throwing them a second baby shower, then that is proper etiquette.</strong> Second, if you don't make a registry, then everyone and there mother is calling to find out what to bring to the shower so you're darned if you do and darned if you don't. Third, before you judge for asking for a new pack n play etc, I'd like you to google  infant product recalls. There are thousands of baby toys/ stuff recalled yearly, and honestly the stuff made today just doesn't keep like old stuff. It's also very common to have a second shower for a new gender, since it is extremely hard to buy gender neutral everything. Now I may just be sensitive because I had 2 baby showers, neither were thrown by me or my parents, I even had 2 girls so have plenty of stuff, but the hosts wanted me to make registries for the guests and the excited grandparents also wanted us to make them so they could shop without us. <strong>Not to mention that if you make one, whatever isn't bought before your baby is born (or your shower), the store sends you coupons to buy the rest.</strong> Just some food for thought, not every situation is so completely black and white.<strong> If you are going to be so harsh and judgmental to a "friend", maybe you should just cut your ties.</strong>
    Posted by Belle2Be[/QUOTE]

    1. Proper etiquette can also be to turn the shower down, explaining that you don't think it's necessary or appropriate when you've already been given so many things the first time around.
    2. Then register, don't have a shower, don't tell anyone unless they ask, and use your coupons after the birth.
    3. You don't know the backstory here, which is fine, but a lot of us know that Meg isn't really friends with this girl anymore - that's part of what makes it poor etiquette/gift grabby that she was invited.
  • megk8ozmegk8oz member
    First Comment
    edited August 2010
    In Response to <a href="http://forums.theknot.com/Sites/theknot/Pages/Main.aspx/wedding-boards_wedding-party_nwr-um-wtfbbq-x-2?plckFindPostKey=Cat:Wedding%20BoardsForum:37Discussion:6a2afa55-4923-43ac-99c6-977b7fdd5c0ePost:562b06b6-da0b-4fca-b6f3-5450c8a6f2a5">Re: NWR: Um, wtfbbq? x 2</a>:
    [QUOTE] Just some food for thought, not every situation is so completely black and white. If you are going to be so harsh and judgmental to a "friend", maybe you should just cut your ties.
    Posted by Belle2Be[/QUOTE]

    Belle, if you actually paid attention to what I said in my OP about how I wasn't in contact with one of the friends anymore (The one who knows she's having a different gender), and if you actually knew the story (Which most of the regs on this board do), you'd know that she is a toxic person that I don't need in my life and I <strong>have</strong> been cutting ties.

    And I fail to see how "harsh and judgemental" I was. I had mentioned being grouchy from not eating dinner, but even with that aside, like it was established in a previous post where I mentioned this, it's one thing to ask for some new clothes, but to create 2 complete registries with Babies 'R Us and Target just seems incredibly extreme for second babies, regardless of whether or not it's a new gender.

    Also, my sister has an infant and a toddler, so don't go lecturing me about "recalls" and all this stuff I allegedly "don't know about". I'm perfectly aware that not everything made 3/4 years ago is "up to snuff", however, based on the one friend's personality, I know for a fact if something of hers had been recalled, I never would have heard the end of it. So I'm willing to put money on the fact that her crib, infant seat and Pack 'n Play are all just fine and dandy and she's just looking to get some new swag. And I am well within my rights to be irritated by somebody inviting me to a shower just to score a gift off of me.

    If you fire a WP member, you're against America.
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    "Meg cracks me up on the regular. Now she gets to do it in two different forums. Yay!!" ~mkrupar
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