Went bridal shopping and now discouraged..

Re: Went bridal shopping and now discouraged..

• goldnvintage

  

  March 2011 edited December 2011

  Well my cousin lives up near Devon in Chicago and mentioned that specific shop had a hard sell. For western white wedding gowns, I think it is the same thing though. I think you should be able to try on any sari or gown without feeling pressured or dismissed.

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• AquarianDragon

  

  March 2011 edited December 2011

  I also went bridal shopping today as well. The first store was more than happy to unpackage their lenghas and cholis. The next 2 places were a bit more resistant. Why did we want to open up the package if we weren't totally sure about about it? Duh, because sometimes out of the package kinda draped on you has a different look than folded in the bag.
  
  The last place we went to was freakin' awesome. I probably looked at 20 different saris plus one lengha, and draped at least six of them. Did buy one sari at the last place and they are holding the lengha and one of the other saris so I can contemplate for I buy... the other places wouldn't do that.

  

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• britishmi member

  

  March 2011 edited December 2011

  We did our shopping in Vancouver , BC and from the suggestions of others we were told to make sure you tell the store people you have just started looking and maynot purchase today and make sure you are with your parents or other family members as they take you more seriously. Good Luck!

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• DFWIndian

  

  March 2011 edited December 2011

  Sorry they did that to you! Did you get an attitude with them? I know I'm terrible sometimes, but if someone does that to me I give it right back. I think you were right to leave and tell them they were rude. There are too many shops out there for them to treat you like it's an incovience for them to show you what they have. I shop in one store now for anything I get in Dallas. I do this for one they give me a good deal and two they treat me really well.
  
  I found it really annoying at first not being able to look at things myself, but the decent stores don't mind opening things for you. They are more then willing to let you see the whole store if needed. Hope you have better luck in NJ. Tell us how it goes!

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• NicOutdoors

  

  March 2011 edited December 2011

  As a white girl who does not speak Urdu or any other Indian languages, dress shopping was super stressful for me. I thankfully had my future sister in law and a family friend with me, who did most of the talking in the various languages required. That being said, even when they DID speak in English for my sake, they would ask my sister in law or the friend about what I liked in the third person as if I wasn't there. After the 8th or 9th store I just got use to it.
  
  It was a very overwhelming experience for me!! I went to Jackson Heights in NY to do some 'window idea' shopping then drove to Hicksville  to order a dress based upon what I observed I liked. Here are my recommendations:
  
  1) Do prior research via online stores and pictures to get SOME idea of what type of beading, what type of material, how elaborate, netting, type of neckline, etc that you want. You don't have to stick with it, but when you ask for a particular style they seem to take you more seriously (learned this by the 3rd or 4th store).
  
  2) Have some type of pre planned escape such as "We need to go have lunch, do you have a card so we can come back?" Otherwise they will push and push and push you to buy at that moment, or to order something at that moment. I found it was really helpful. Or something like "We parked on the street and need to go move the car but can we have a card to come back?" Something like that signals that you are ready to go and was a sanity saver!
  
  3) Be cheerful!! All shops responded well to it. I didn't have any issues with the below stores being willing to open up the bags and try them on. I don't know if it was because I was so obviously out of my element (neve having worn a lengha before) or I just got lucky.
  
  4) Don't forget to get your price lowered! See if they can throw anything else in there. Most places had some standard jewelry that I could try on to see how things would look with a neckalce. They also had shoes so I could wear my comfortable boots in the snow but look wonderful with the dresses on.
  
  5) Periodically take assessment of what you liked and what you didn't so that you have a more clear picture of what you are liking before moving on to another store.
  
  6) Obviously, don't let them know that you are JUSt looking, as they WON"T take them out of the bags for a half hearted customer. They are going for the sale!
  
  7) Try on different types, even if you think you won't like it. I though I would want a 10 panel so it would spread out all around me, but found that an 8 pannel looked better on my frame. I thougth I wanted a round neck but ended up going with a sweetheart neck, shorter sleeves, and even a corset. You never know whaty ou'll determine you actually like
  
  Here are stores that I liked that I went to:
  
  Rashmina 72-26 Broadway Jackson heights 718-446-3603
  Lavanya 37-08 74th St Jackson heights 718-565-5404
  Aura Fashion 37-30 74th St jackson Heights 718-426-4001
  Aainaa 101 Broadway Hicksville aainaaonline.com 516-822-5304
  
  I ultimately ordered my dress from Nazakat in Hicksville. They were SOOO nice. I don't have my dress yet (two more weeks!!!!) but I am hopeful it will look just like I imagine. Any needed alterations are included.
  
  I hope some of this helps all of you! Good luck!

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• kpwedkk member

  

  March 2011 edited December 2011

  Shame on those store owners!  If they want your business, they would open up every single outfit you want to try on, or check out!  Your experience definitely detered you away from shopping and don't let it spoil your mood.  There are plenty other stores that don't do what those folks did...
  
  Jackson Heights and Liberty Ave in Queens/Jamaica NYC have a lot of stores where the staff is nice, and they let you try as much things on as you can...
  
  I went with Sona Chaandi in Los Angeles, and even Frontier and met with awesome staff, and lots of selection  
  
  I hope it works out for you!
  
  
  

  
  "The best and most beautiful things in the world cannot be seen or even touched, they must be felt with the heart." ~ Miss K ~
  

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• jessie23Wed209743 member

  

  March 2011 edited December 2011

  I also went to Sahil when we were lengha shopping. The woman was the exact same way with us. My MIL caught the attitude and asked if it was an issue that we wanted to try them on and it was expressed to us many people go in there, try stuff on and NEVER buy....because they than order it direct from India for half the price. Which is what we ended up doing. The one we found was $3k and we ended up getting one for $800. It's very common and because they are so delicate and mostly made with crystals they do get irritated. And you sound like me, i felt bad too but it's YOUR wedding...you have to love what you wear. Try them on!!! you have know if you like the fit. Most likely you will need alterations though ...don't get discouraged. If anything do what i did..i told them i was trying them on and we'd be back that weekend with my mom (cuz she would be paying) and the lady eased up and was happy to help us

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• temurlang member

  

  March 2011 edited December 2011

  I had a similar experience but I didn't feel bad making them take things out (I guess I'm not as nice as you all lol).  It was really annoying because I knew what I wanted and then they would show me something entirely different.  Like I said a fuchsia bandani lehnga with a traditional sari blouse.  And they would get out a chartreuse lehnga with a really modern blouse!  Luckily DH is aggressive but by the time we reached the last shop he was getting pretty short-tempered with the staff.

  wedding bio

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• Priya490

  

  March 2011 edited December 2011

  Thanks girls for all of your advice and responses!  I still have a lot of time to find my wedding dress but I'm glad I went shopping in Chicago because it opened up my eyes!  I feel more prepared now and know what to expect.  I was just diasppointed that I couldn't even try on dresses.  Kinda made me start thinking that maybe I should wear an American style wedding dress just so that I will be sure that I love the dress I'm buying and can try it on before I buy it! 
  
  I think I just need to stand my ground though and be hard on them if they won't let me try on a dress that I genuinely like.  I always hear how brides know when they have found their dress when they fall in love with it once they see it and feel great in it when they have tried it on.  I just really want to experience that excitement too and hope the shopping experience doesn't take away from that!  

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• temurlang member

  

  March 2011 edited December 2011

  American bridal stores are kind of like that too.  The more expensive ones don't even let you in without an appointment.
  
  But don't worry.  You'll find the right dress.  Just go with your own feelings.
  

  wedding bio

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