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Moms and Maids

Stressed over choosing my maids!

I have not officially chosen and asked my bridesmaids yet, but I am already stressing myself out over any possible hurt feelings that could come of my decisions.  I had a close group of 4 friends in college, and always envisioned them being in my wedding party.  We all remained close through college, but I also became close with a few other friends during that time.  Now, several years later, I do not realistically think I will include any of my original group in my wedding party.  I am sure they all have felt the drift, too, and this wouldn't be causing me so much grief, had it not been for a comment one of my friends made last month.  We were all at a wedding and one of my friends mentioned "when we are all in each other's weddings".  There is a chance I will invite one of these original college friends to be in my wedding, but it depends on the number my fiance and I decide on.  How do I break the news to these friends without hurting their feelings?

Re: Stressed over choosing my maids!

  • You don't absolutely have to have even sides, so if you have more people you would like to ask than your fiance, that's fine.  Your photographer will be able to help stage pictures to look nice and you can group people to walk in/out of the ceremony.  Don't let numbers dictate who you ask - ask those individuals you consider your nearest and dearest friends.

    When you do decide, you ask the ladies you would like, but you don't say anything to those you don't plan on asking.  They will figure it out on their own.  Plus, you have some time to really think about who you consider your nearest and dearest; if you wait until the suggested 6 to 9 months from your wedding date to ask people to stand up with you, you don't need to make a firm decision until November at the earliest.
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  • I agree, my FI and I are not having even sides. He had 6 people he really wanted to ask, and I had 5, I absolutely could have asked someone to even it but I just really didnt want that to be the reason to ask someone.
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