Giving the Toast at the Reception

ebhavens · February 2012

My Step Father is paying for the wedding, and has really gone out of his way to make me feel like I am his daughter. I know that normally the groom should be giving the Toast at the Reception, however I would love to stand and say a short Thank You to the Man who didn't have to do all he has done for me.

At what point can I do this???

During the Speaches?

My Step Father is welcoming everybody, and we have the Best Man and MOH after him. Does my FI speak after them? If that is the order, when should I speak? We also then have the Priest saying a prayer before dinner.

Any suggestions for me???

adamar15 · February 2012

That's a whole lot of speeches. Does your FI really need to speak? Can you thank your step-dad at the rehearsal dinner instead?

ebhavens · February 2012

Good point....I dono, should I ask my Fiance to just speak at the rehearsal, and I say a thank you at the wedding reception???

AllAboutTheBenjamin · February 2012

We had lots of toasts/speeches at our reception, lol.

My pastor gave a blessing before the meal.

After the meal we did champagne toasts; best man, matron of honor, and both dads. After those were done Ben and I both thanked everyone who helped and thanked everyone for coming. Then we had cake.

We also had an emcee. My uncle was our emcee. He introduced the bridal party when we arrived at the reception, and introduced each person who gave a toast.

ETA - the speeches/toasts were not long. Maybe a couple minutes apiece, except the best man did kind of go on for a while. My dad did too.

HannahK15 · February 2012

I think it really depends on the length of other's speeches. If the other speeches are relatively short I don't see why can't say a quick you to your stepfather.

LeiselEB · February 2012

My fiance and I plan on thanking our parents at the rehearsal dinner. Then at the reception we'd just have a toast from my dad and from the best man and MOH.

Any way that you can speak at the rehearsal dinner rather than the reception?

ebhavens · February 2012

I could but my mother has said she really wants me to thank him in front of everybody, as some have not done so for him in the past. I guess I just want to make sure he is happy.

Should I ask the MOH and BM to make sure the speeches are under a certain time?

AllAboutTheBenjamin · February 2012

OP, it really shouldn't take you longer than a minute or two to thank your stepfather at the reception. It's not like adding it with the other speeches would be overkill or make things too long. I think you're over-thinking this a little.

ebhavens · February 2012

Ok cool. I honestly just didn't know if it looked bad for the Bride to do a speach, or if it was normal. (not sure why I worried about it)

Thanks ladies!!!

Philary2010 · February 2012

If you want to make the speech at the wedding, I think you should. No one comes to a wedding not expecting to hear speeches, and the people there should love and care enough about you to hold on a few moments while you thanked your step-dad.

You could you also do a couple's speech with your FI after all the speeches are done. Addressing your guests as husband and wife rogether might be really fun and fun for your step-dad to see that the gratitude comes from both of you. That way you don't have to be concerned about time and the message would be getting out to him.

As a way to break up the evening, you could also do this a little further into the dancing, if you are having dancing. This would take all of a few minutes and give everyone a moment to breathe without missing a song! It will also seem less like a formal speech and more just a huge thank you to your step-dad and to everyone who came out to celebrate.

polichik · February 2012

We did speeches during dinner, so people could eat at the same time and weren't just sitting there. I think it's perfectly fine to thank him as a part of your couples' speech. You and your FI could just make a quick speech, thank everyone for coming, and then mention your stepdad. DH toasted me at the rehearsal dinner, and then we both toasted our guests together during the reception dinner.

StephBeanWed61502 · February 2012

You could always break up the speeches. At my friend's wedding, she had the MOH and BM give short speeches right before the main dinner course was served. Then, just before the cake cutting, she gave a short speech thanking her parents for all they had done (her mom and dad completely paid for and mostly planned the wedding). Each speech was probably no more than 3 minutes long, and with the break in between, it didn't feel like too much.

leia1979 · February 2012

I think if speeches are kept short and done while people are eating, no one minds. Breaking them up like Steph suggested sounds good, too.

NOLAbridealmost · February 2012

In Response to <a href="http://forums.theknot.com/Sites/theknot/Pages/Main.aspx/wedding-boards_etiquette_giving-the-toast-at-the-reception?plckFindPostKey=Cat:Wedding%20BoardsForum:9Discussion:6866c156-6744-4b5a-aaed-b2bc1c12eff4Post:a56febb3-ef77-4bc4-89f4-3473119ff371">Re: Giving the Toast at the Reception</a>:
[QUOTE]My fiance and I plan on thanking our parents at the rehearsal dinner. Then at the reception we'd just have a toast from my dad and from the best man and MOH. Any way that you can speak at the rehearsal dinner rather than the reception?
Posted by LeiselEB[/QUOTE]

<div>This is exactly what we did and exactly what I was going to suggest. </div>

Giving the Toast at the Reception

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