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psychotic_princess16 · April 2010

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mbcdefg · April 2010

Kick her out and replace her with someone who knows how to do the job properly. She should've known better than to do something within the window before the wedding. The engagement period is YOUR time, and your so-called "friend" ought to have the decency to check with you during this timeframe before she planed anything that required her leaving the immediate area, spending money or altering her personal appearance. She should've run all of her plans by you first so you could've approved them in advance.

And when you kick her out, I suggest doing it with a cute poem to soften the blow.

emilyinchile · April 2010

Feeling upset is fine - you can feel whatever you want. But doing anything would border on bridezilla. Plenty of people have bach parties more than 3 weeks before their weddings (I did!) because of scheduling reasons. She should be able to get her BM dress altered 3 weeks beforehand (which usually isn't multiple fittings anyway) and not have a huge change in weight while she's traveling...and if she does, that's her problem to figure out, not yours. And other than those two things, which are easy fixes, there's nothing she needs to be doing, so I don't think it really IS a problem at all.

Also, your MOH doesn't have to plan the shower OR help with things. If your sister would like to host a shower, she can take the reins on that one and ask (not demand) for help from other BMs or relatives.

MyNameIsNot · April 2010

In Response to <a href="http://forums.theknot.com/Sites/theknot/Pages/Main.aspx/wedding-boards_wedding-party_maid-of-honour-fleeing-country?plckFindPostKey=Cat:Wedding%20BoardsForum:37Discussion:7121e85f-26de-4386-9891-b3baccda19d9Post:df87878c-c3a1-4c62-a124-d54e12a8d05e">Maid of Honour - Fleeing the country!</a>:
[QUOTE]My MOH (and lifelong best friend) is leaving the country 3 weeks before my wedding. She decided this on a whim and booked and paid for the trip without even telling me she WANTED to travel any time in the near future. I understand I only get one day, but I am extremely shocked that she is leaving the country 3 weeks before the wedding and coming back a few days before. I asked her about the bachelorette party she promised to throw during that time, and the dress alterations and final fittings, and she said "we will just have to arrange those things for when I come back or before I leave." I'm horrified that she doesn't even think this is a problem at all...She hasn't been very involved in anything so far, and I'm just not sure what to do about it any more. I'm starting to wish I has asked my sister to be my MOH instead, since she has been amazing about every single wedding detail and is the one pushing my MOH to plan the shower and help with things. Is it okay for me to feel upset about this? I'm worried I'm being a bridezilla...
Posted by psychotic_princess16@hotmail.com[/QUOTE]<div>
</div><div>I don't see where this is a problem at all.</div><div>
</div><div>The only problem I see is a self centered bride who thinks that other people should make life decisions around her wedding.

</div>

baystateapple · April 2010

I dunno guys...Psychotic Princess? I think this one is MUD.

Licia&Wayne · April 2010

Le sigh. A version of this question has been asked recently. Maybe you should check it out for more in depth advice.

Generally, it's okay to be disappointed. Take a big deep breath, be upset/mad/whatever you want to feel for a limited amount of time (like an hour), and another big deep breath and let it go. I assume your MOH is an adult and can take care of what is needed of her, i.e. showing up at the wedding. So stop worrying. It's wasted energy.

MyNameIsNot · April 2010

I guess I could understand if she wasn't going to come back for it, but she said she would. And, she said she'd move the parties so that she could throw them before she left.

It sounds like the MOH is really going out of her way to cater to this bride before she leaves. This bride should be thanking the MOH for being so considerate with so much else going on in her life.

I just can't wrap my head around how selfish people get when they get married.

tidetravel · April 2010

What you need to focus on is the fact that she will be there FOR YOUR WEDDING. That's the important part. And anyone can plan a b-party/shower; your MOH doesn't have to do it.

CA2MT4EveR · April 2010

In Response to <a href="http://forums.theknot.com/Sites/theknot/Pages/Main.aspx/wedding-boards_wedding-party_maid-of-honour-fleeing-country?plckFindPostKey=Cat:Wedding%20BoardsForum:37Discussion:7121e85f-26de-4386-9891-b3baccda19d9Post:070893d7-6bbf-4f56-a551-18ccc8a3fc3d">Re: Maid of Honour - Fleeing the country!</a>:
[QUOTE]I dunno guys...Psychotic Princess? I think this one is MUD.
Posted by baystateapple[/QUOTE]

My thoughts exactly before I even started reading anyone elses posts.

OP, you ARE psychotic, and ONLY get THAT ONE DAY! Your MOH is not obliged to anything but your wedding day- with limitations at that.

andy71781 · April 2010

Get your sh*t together and you won't need help in the 3 weeks before.

Licia&Wayne · April 2010

In Response to <a href="http://forums.theknot.com/Sites/theknot/Pages/Main.aspx/wedding-boards_wedding-party_maid-of-honour-fleeing-country?plckFindPostKey=Cat:Wedding BoardsForum:37Discussion:7121e85f-26de-4386-9891-b3baccda19d9Post:8956d64b-1000-4bed-83ab-2ec2cdec16fe">Re: none</a>:
[QUOTE]haha, butthat!
Posted by stina93446[/QUOTE]

YES! I second that sentiment!

LarissaAnn · April 2010

Good grief, I guess my bridesmaids & MOH sucked! My shower was December 7 and my bach party March 7... for a March 28 wedding! And they were all in the area the 3 weeks before my wedding, so they could've done it later if schedules allowed. Damn, you're right. I hate them now.

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