Ever just wanna say...

kristinathenina · May 2012

Have you ever just wanted to say "f this, Lets elope"? My fmil keeps driving me insane saying how people these days spend too much money on weddings, and how its not necessary and blah blah blah. She has not volunteered one penny towards our wedding, and I have no intention of asking for anything. I am so fed up with her that I am ready to skip the wedding and just elope, just my Fi, me, and my family. She would not be invited

FLGatorGal88 · May 2012

Yep... We were feeling the same way and we decided to just go for it... My fmil said the exact same thing your fmil said anytime FI would talk about the wedding. I say if you are really wanting to elope seriously think about it and talk with your families to see how they feel. If you want your family there then I feel its only right to invite FI's family too. I think FI needs to talk to her and let her know that what she is saying isn't really helpful or just stop talking about anything wedding related with her. I hope everything works out... GL

hisbabygirl76 · May 2012

Every damn day. I am actually at the point I dont even want to be bothered with a wedding anymore. Its just way to stresful regardless how it happens.

turtleslove · May 2012

I asked my FI if we could elope right off the bat.. He said no, but I think he is seeing differently now even though it is too late.
It only matters what the two of you want!

Annas2013 · May 2012

If we hadn't already put a deposit down on the venue, we would have eloped by now. Ironically it's my mom, not my FI's, who's being the pain. Every time she talks about the wedding she says "We're getting married in a barn. Our wedding's going to be a hoedown". I thought there were only 2 people getting married, but when she talks it sounds like there are three. Plus we're over capacity in the venue right now guest list wise, and she doesn't care. I'm terrified she's going to invite too many people, or turn the whole thing tacky. Plus she wants to do a buffet, and then a candy bar and a baked potato bar. That'd be fun if we could fit it all in the barn. But with as many people as she's inviting we can't. Let's not forget she waits to the last minute to do everything and has literally said "It doesn't matter what you want decoration-wise. It's my job to decorate, and you can deal with it."

My dad and she are paying for it, but my dad is contributing probably 80% of the money. He's on board with my ideas, but currently refuses to discuss anything wedding-related as it's still a year away.

If you really want to elope, then go for it. I wish we had 75% of the time.

SSaltzman87 · May 2012

I've definitely had those times too. But especially now we're at the point of no return, FI and I would be out $2000 we've already spent on deposits, lol.

melb2013 · May 2012

We're a little past the point of no return. I originally wanted to have a super small, intimate wedding, but my FI comes from a culture where weddings are the end all. I think we would have been eternally shunned had we not had a wedding.

I haven't had the eloping thoughts in a while. Honestly, at this point, I've resigned myself to the wedding.

pittpoint1119 · May 2012

FI is to that point cause he is sooo annoyed with me asking him questions. My FMIl wants everything that her other 2 didnt have at their weddings, but she realizes what we can and csn't afford wich is nice. FI wishes I would focus more on the house we are buyng rather then this wedding. I wish we would have done a DW, but after attending weddings of close friends and family, I know I would regret not having everyone there!

jmcjdw13 · May 2012

In Response to <a href="http://forums.theknot.com/Sites/theknot/Pages/Main.aspx/wedding-club-boards_may-2013-weddings_ever-just-wanna-say?plckFindPostKey=Cat:Wedding%20Club%20BoardsForum:ea657a87-d1dc-4588-999f-31c9deeef720Discussion:21bae963-aff6-46e5-b61d-4bc237552475Post:031fbcbd-c695-4f8b-b476-db0fe00f0d7d">Re: Ever just wanna say...</a>:
[QUOTE]If we hadn't already put a deposit down on the venue, we would have eloped by now. Ironically it's my mom, not my FI's, who's being the pain. Every time she talks about the wedding she says "We're getting married in a barn. Our wedding's going to be a hoedown". I thought there were only 2 people getting married, but when she talks it sounds like there are three. Plus we're over capacity in the venue right now guest list wise, and she doesn't care. I'm terrified she's going to invite too many people, or turn the whole thing tacky. Plus she wants to do a buffet, and then a candy bar and a baked potato bar. That'd be fun if we could fit it all in the barn. But with as many people as she's inviting we can't. Let's not forget she waits to the last minute to do everything and has literally said "It doesn't matter what you want decoration-wise. It's my job to decorate, and you can deal with it." My dad and she are paying for it, but my dad is contributing probably 80% of the money. He's on board with my ideas, but currently refuses to discuss anything wedding-related as it's still a year away. If you really want to elope, then go for it. I wish we had 75% of the time.
Posted by Annas2013[/QUOTE]
Wow!! Your story sounds exactly like mine...my sister is getting married this July so I've had a close up view of what my mom can be like in regards to reliving her wedding dreams. Plus my mom is in competitive mode against her sisters whose daughters' weddings were all elegant and classic. Sigh!

RebCappon · May 2012

Yup, all the time!

I hate the thought of all the $ we're spending.

[Deleted User] · May 2012

Aww date twin...you can come to Vegas with us! *hugs*

mymissingpuzzlepiece · May 2012

Yeah... we definitely think about it all the time. But it isn't an option because we wouldn't be able to get our deposit back from the venue. And anyway, I love the place we are getting married so I don't feel too bad. But a DW would be so much easier.

Knottie1450123632 · May 2012

wow im glad im not having those issues. knock on wood not yet anyway. for all having family issues i would say be tactful and sit them down and explain how u are feeling, how they are making you feel and explain that technically you have the final say. im not sure if i would let mom add guests but thats just me.

abbyandmatt51 · May 2012

Yup. Sometimes it just so stressful I'm just like, I don't really want to be a bride, I just want to be married! But, we're also at the point of no return so we're doing it. It's getting so much better now that I've chilled out a little bit. It took me a little time to realize that weddings are NOT just about the bride and groom. They're very much about the parents and family as well. Once that sunk in, it helped me to relax and go with the flow.

Just breate ladies, our days will come and they will be beautiful! And it will all be worth it!

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