Unsure about dress tone for outdoor wedding

anssett · August 2012

I'm planning a wedding that makes me & my sweetie happy and I will get flamed for some of my ideas. That's ok.

I'm doing a TINY ceremony when the cherry trees bloom in Seattle (March or April). The 3 out of towners (parents only) get 2 weeks notice if they want to come. 6-9 people total. The parents are fine with this. I have always wanted to be married under the cherry trees and FI insists we should. However, we want to do a big family party celebration thing once the weather is good (July). That will be a picnic.

So I'm looking for an offbeat dress to match my offbeat self and offbeat wedding(s). Things like pink ruffles or feathers have come to mind. I'm not aiming for white. NO TRAIN. But I don't really wear a lot of dresses so I'm kinda overwhelmed and don't have a good sense of what will be really cold, what will annoy me at the picnic. Since I dress up in 'girl drag' so rarely I kinda want something over the top, but then I get annoyed at its impracticality.

I'm scanning websites but everything starts to look the same to me. I have some sense of my shape and know really short and really tight is bad, I have D boobs which limits cute summery things, and am a happily hourglassed 10-12.

Thoughts? Experience? Direction? If you could have any dress for this what would you pick and why?

meacu1pa · August 2012

Are you retro/pin-up at all? http://www.bluevelvetvintage.com/

http://www.pinupgirlclothing.com/vintage-style-inspired-clothing/retrodresses.html

for example: http://www.pinupgirlclothing.com/ava-dress-teal.html

Victorian? http://www.victoriantradingco.com/catindex/C2-3-all.html

Gatsby? http://www.unique-vintage.com/flapper-flapper-cocktail-dresses-c-31_107.html

http://www.leluxeclothing.com/1920s-beaded-gowns-c-7.html

meacu1pa

BMcLeodTeam · August 2012

You won't get flamed for that here! You're actually completely following etiquette if your ceremony is a very small and intimate event like yours, and then having a picnic party afterwards. As long as you remain honest about the fact you're already married, and this is a party not your actual wedding day, then there's no confusion or etiquette problems at all

PP gave you some great links. Do you have any inspiration pictures showing things you like, even if its just parts of the dresses that you like? It will give us a better idea...

anssett · August 2012

Thanks for the links. I don't have a lot of girl friends, and the ones I have aren't terribly girly (I don't hang out with anyone who wears make-up daily). So I appreciate some opinions from people who are more used to dresses and being dressy. I'm not anti-dress, it's just outside my comfort zone.

Looking at your links some of the pin-up dresses looked totally cute, but not the aesthetic I think I want. I think I'm more whimsical, hippie, flowy. This is the dress idea that I've been most drawn to:

http://www.etsy.com/listing/104795933/custom-bridesmaids-dresses

however they're made over slip dresses and that won't work for my curvy figure. (My waist is closer to a 6 with my hips more in the 10-12 range. I love my body, but know it's trickier to dress). Light flowy fabrics tend to be less forgiving of curves but maybe I just need to keep looking around for something more structured underneath with an outer whimsical aesthetic.

I'm not sure what other search terms to use beyond "naturey?, hippie, flowy, whimsical, bohemian" to describe that feeling. Do you guys have ideas? Other things you've seen that bridge light feel with a bit more structure underneath?

anssett · August 2012

I've thought about the custom dress route but it's kinda intimidating. I do have a couple friends who are excellent at sewing and have been teaching me. So far all I've made is a girl-shaped lab coat (it has a waist and is red!). Since I do like a more whimsical aesthetic maybe my friends would undertake making this dress with me and I could participate under their experienced eye. That would be really empowering actually. I could have EXACTLY what I want (within the tolerance of my sewing skills, of course).

The more I write this the more excited I am. As long as I keep things simple enough, don't wait until I'm rushed, and celebrate the imperfections that will be there as part of the charm, this is awesome.

Since the wedding will have no other props, favors, decor, stuff, etc, then I think I can undertake this. MUAHAHAHAHA

Thanks

meacu1pa · August 2012

Ah-HA! I know those dresses in that link! Ok- try searching for Maxi dresses- they tend along the "hippie" line.

LOTS of variation, but that's a good foundational term.

What about the Such as...http://www.etsy.com/shop/christintina?ref=seller_info convertible wrap dresses?

There are TONS of options (also, TONS of people who make them with slight variation and at different price ranges) PLUS, it's a relatively easy pattern to find if you want to make one (or more than one) yourself.

I dress up in costumes, but rarely in dresses. My dress is just a prom/formal gown. uh...picture is around here somewhere

I have a pear shape, so I understand finding what you're comfortable in AND what you like.

If you come across any other inspiration or things that you like, maybe we can help with more search terms.

Ta,

meacu1pa

meacu1pa · August 2012

Did some quick searches and found very pretty things!!

This seller has some fun items: http://www.etsy.com/shop/Madabby?ref=seller_info

for instance: http://www.etsy.com/listing/97599928/elegant-criss-cross-short-dress

or

http://www.etsy.com/listing/103169096/reserved-listing-for-kim-custom-made?ref=sr_gallery_7&ga_search_query=whimsical+dress&ga_view_type=gallery&ga_ship_to=ZZ&ga_min=0&ga_max=0&ga_search_type=handmade

This shop has a LOT of color! http://www.etsy.com/shop/momosoho?ref=seller_info

And just because I have been in LOVE with her stuff for over a year: (this has precious little to do with dresses, but if you want to talk about whimsy on a possibly chilly day!) http://www.etsy.com/shop/EnlightenedPlatypus?ref=seller_info

meacu1pa

anssett · August 2012

meacu1pa,

Thanks. Those are cool. Is it too literal to wear flowers on a dress when I'm getting married under a blooming tree? Probably.

This caught my eye but fails the no flowers guideline:

http://www.etsy.com/listing/105823432/flower-skirt-convertibleinfinity-dress

also, how do you wear a bra under that. My D cups need a bra!

Also, I have a shoulder tattoo I'd love to show off so straps big enough to cover a bra, but not actual sleeves, is optimal.

This shape is interesting. I could wear a strapless bra with it.

http://www.etsy.com/listing/105446195/pleated-twisted-bust-dress

I think chiffon is a fabric I should look at more.

anssett · August 2012

Maddaby's shop is amazing. I told my fiance I wanted to look like a fairy princess and he didn't get it. I'm not surprised because I couldn't articulate it either! This to me screams fairy princess.

meacu1pa · August 2012

Bah. Humbug on "too literal."

Do whatcha want.

I COMPLETELY understand wanting to show off the tattoo! I knew immediately I needed a halter or a one-sholder dress to keep my tattoo available for viewing. She's also copper-toned and fall themed, and was a partial inspiration for my copper-purple color theme.

The longline starpless bras for wedding dresses can be VERY helpful! (I'm a fan of corsetry and bodices in my costumes because I rather dislike underwire.) They have some that have adjustable straps, too, that you can wear, oh, 8 different ways?

Any ideas for the "crowning achievement" or what you want to do with your hair? Veil? no veil? Short hair? Long hair? Fairy circlets? (Am I getting ahead of myself here?)

meacu1pa

anssett · August 2012

lol. I love sculpted flowers in the fabric but maybe the entire skirt is too much. There is middle ground like: http://www.etsy.com/listing/93327365/custom-make-vintage-wedding-dress-a-line?ref=sr_gallery_43&ga_search_query=chiffon+bridesmaid+dress&ga_view_type=gallery&ga_ship_to=ZZ&ga_min=0&ga_max=0&ga_page=7&ga_search_type=all

For hair, I have pixie cut hair so that dramatically limits what I can do. I'll probably put some of my favorite salt spray in it that makes it clump into cute curls. I hadn't thought about other adornments yet. No veil. Maybe a tiara! Probably not though. I want simple, natural and low key. Maybe I'll get inspired later on and find a pale pink veil to clip in my hair or something. Birdcage veils are beautiful but don't fit the fairy princess cherry blossom nature vibe (IMO). This is the only image close to what I can imagine (she even looks a lot like me, but is missing my awesome tattoo)

http://www.google.com/imgres?hl=en&safe=off&sa=X&biw=1600&bih=799&tbm=isch&prmd=imvns&tbnid=Nqc-YiVhJy8LiM:&imgrefurl=http://www.tradewindtiaras.com/advice.html&docid=cl098mIEuEKU6M&imgurl=http://www.tradewindtiaras.com/images/materials/short_veil.jpg&w=192&h=237&ei=MFQsUNuBEqWdiQKFiYCwCA&zoom=1&iact=hc&vpx=899&vpy=156&dur=2354&hovh=189&hovw=153&tx=55&ty=111&sig=117250324926788242015&page=1&tbnh=143&tbnw=127&start=0&ndsp=39&ved=1t:429,r:5,s:0,i:91

These caught my eye too:

http://www.etsy.com/listing/104581781/pink-satin-dolphin-ruffle-octopus

http://www.etsy.com/listing/104513772/ballerina-double-layer-chiffon

I clearly need to read more about bra options. Before ordering a dress I should go to a store and try on something a similar cut of the same fabric to make sure the shape lays as well as I think it should. (and allows frolicking). I really love the idea of a custom dress now. It sounds fun not scary. I just need to be patient with myself as I figure out what I want (and not judge my taste during the process)

Thanks for the feedback.

meacu1pa · August 2012

Bingo to that last part. No judging before you get the ideas out. You're allowed to say "no, I reallly DON'T like that" but at least wait until you've let all of the craziness run free. Edison was a HUGE fan of mistakes, after all.

"Results! Why man, I have gotten a lot of results. I know several thousand things that won't work."

"Many of life's failures are people who did not realize how close they were to success when they gave up."
"Our greatest weakness lies in giving up. The most certain way to succeed is always to try just one more time."
"Show me a thoroughly satisfied man and I will show you a failure."

I'm loving the ruffles. Adorbs!

Because of our conversation, I just put up a discussion about hair/vveiling options. I have short hair, too, and it was agony for me to find what I wanted. there really are tons of options.

(And I didn't know my links bled over lthe text area like that. My apologies to the forum! I'll play with the hyperlink option below- here's hoping the quotes I grabbed don't do something just as silly)

meacu1pa

grubbmcc · August 2012

I have similar figure issues, and I couldn't find any dresses I liked in bridal shops. I ended up getting a corset, chemise, and skirt combination at a renaissance faire. It was much more cost effective than commissioning a custom dress and the separate components allowed for my curves. Plus, the corset drives my hubby insane!

anssett · August 2012

I tried on some dresses today. I found a few that really fit my shape well! Now I need to figure out how to create something that has structure, but whimsy.

The style 20012 on the right

This one looked great too but I'd need a shorter version.

The theme I see is clearly ruching to one side, and enough structure to show of my sexy curves, rather than make them look boxy or just plain huge.

I still like the mixed textile and color pallet of the pic I showed earlier. I'm not sure how to use multiple fabrics to create the single side ruching effect.

anssett · August 2012

This is the mixed textile pic:

I love the whimsy and natural feel, but I need more structure and MUCH more curve.

anssett · August 2012

I don't sew either! I might have someone make me a dress that way if I can't find a bridesmaid's dress I like enough. I found this tonight:

http://www.ivyandaster.com/collections/social-dresses/products/love-and-tenderness#.UDmOX9ZmSD0

If I added a mixed color sash it could pretty awesome. I will go try it on sometime soon.

reppunzel · August 2012

You might be interested in this eBay seller. Most of the dresses have ties or lacing in the back so you adjust the fit to flatter your curves.

http://stores.ebay.com/holyclothingexclusivessizessm5x

anssett · August 2012

[QUOTE] Whoops, thought you said you did at some point earlier in this convo. That's what I get for not rereading everything!
Posted by Schatzi13[/QUOTE]<div>
</div><div>To clarify, I don't sew well. I've done 1 medium-sized sewing project (a lab coat). Making a wedding dress is a whole other class.

</div>

anssett · August 2012

I took the boy to the dress store to see some of the dresses I liked. He is adorable and thinks I look great in everything, but had very specific likes/dislikes to help guide me. He also confirmed that a single shoulder-length veil that can be both in front of, or behind, my face is what he had in mind. :-)

I'm going to try on the Ivy & Aster Love & Tenderness with my girlfriends soon. I still think the whimsy of the Armour sans Anguish is more my style. Also, I'm really sexy. hehehehe. Trying on well constructed dresses (boning, etc) feels great. An extra hundred bucks to look even more like a knockout is worth it!

It occurred to me that since we're delaying the party/reception/picnic 3 months due to weather, and we're trying to concieve in a couple months, I could be up to 6 months pregnant at the reception. A dress I buy now will fit at 3 months pregnant, but not at 6! hehehe. I guess I'll just wait and see what happens.

[Deleted User] · September 2012

What about finding a dress that you likes that fits your chest & hips & taking it to a seamstress and having it altered to fit your small waist?

Unsure about dress tone for outdoor wedding

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