So, I really did not want to have a wedding, but my fiance and his family really wanted to so I went along with their every demand- it being at their Catholic church (no one in my family is Catholic), to there having to be a dinner, to having the food and cake, as well as the flowers, be from their grocery store, and from having the photographer that they wanted. They even tried to make us have a full-mass but luckily, the priest said that it was not fair to my family and made sure we had a half-mass. I just felt like I had no control over anything; any decision I made was either wrong or weird and my mind needed to be changed. Everybody felt like they had a right to plan this dumb wedding except for me. My heart was not in planning and while I would have loved to have perfect details and stuff, I just let things be decided without much regard for how it was. But I was hopeful that once the day came, all this weirdness would be over. However, it is not. The one good thing is that my in-laws are all happy that they got the wedding they wanted and that has made everything peaceful on that front.
(I must add that two days before the wedding, because I let my distaste for having a wedding show too much, his parents wanted us to call of the wedding and forced us to make the decision asap. We felt like we should call it off, so we did but then changed our minds. They were very irritated because his mom decided to call people immediately to cancel everything. So, a day was lost in planning because it was filled with trying to get it going on again.)
However, I keep hearing weird comments from people telling me that the wedding was weird and disorganized. Maybe it was. But I would not say that to anyone. We did not know we could kiss at the end of the ceremony and if we did, we would have requested not to. So, when the priest said, "You may now kiss your bride.", my DH just kissed my forehead which apparently freaked everyone out. Then we did not have a bouquet or garter toss, or the cake-cutting stuff (well, we cut the cake...but only to serve it to our guests). I did not wear a veil, or a garter or tiara- just some earrings and a bracelet. Heck, I didn't even wear any special undergarments- just some cheap packaged Hanes underwear.
I don't know...it just really hurts my feelings that people would say that to me- especially when they know it has been a very sensitive subject for me for a long time. I just wish I had more people's support instead of some more negativity. Why do they have to say anything? Or at least end it with something positive ("You could really tell your heart wasn't in this wedding, but at least your dress was pretty." or something like that). It just makes me feel really sad.