BM gifts

strazzypants · February 2013

Hi everybody,

I keep reading over and over that it's a horrible idea to get your bridesmaids all the same gift and even worse to give the girls something to wear on the day of the wedding. What if it's a pair of gorgeous earrings or a brooch that they picked out and all loved? Can there be an exception?

[Deleted User] · February 2013

Would you have bought that for them for their birthday? If so. Then ok, I suppose, but you need to take your wedding completely out of the question.

What I did:

MOH: Spa gift card for prenatal massage (she will be about 6 months then), personalized necklace that I made (nothing to do with the wedding), leather bracelet (nothing to do with wedding), candle

MOH: Sundance gift card, personalized necklace that I made (nothing to do with the wedding), leather bracelet (nothing to do with wedding), candle

BM: Toms gift card, personalized necklace that I made (nothing to do with the wedding), leather bracelet (nothing to do with wedding), candle

BM: 6-Month Subscription to Birchbox, personalized necklace that I made (nothing to do with the wedding), leather bracelet (nothing to do with wedding), candle

BM: College Bookstore gift card, personalized necklace that I made (nothing to do with the wedding), leather bracelet (nothing to do with wedding), candle

FG: Build-A-Bear, personalized necklace that I made (nothing to do with the wedding), leather bracelet (nothing to do with wedding)

strazzypants · February 2013

Thanks, RetreadBride! I see where you're coming from, but I'm saying if it's a piece of jewelry that they're madly in love with, why not surprise them with it? Couldn't it be seen as a memento from the wedding?

strazzypants · February 2013

Yes, it's a matter of them seeing it but they couldn't afford them. We saw some gorgeous, hideously expensive earrings and they all jumped up and down saying that they loved them, so I thought I'd surpsise them with it to wear on the day.

Peledreamsofrain · February 2013

Ok, here's the thing. You are not buying the jewelry for your BMs. They are props to please YOU, for YOUR event, and to make YOUR picture look the way YOU want them to and please YOURSELF. See all those you's there? Youre gifting yourself if anyone when you require the 'gifts' to be wedding props. That's like a husband buying his wife a mop. Arguing that it's an expensive mop doesn't make the 'gift' any less selfish.

mlg78 · February 2013

In Response to <a href="http://forums.theknot.com/Sites/theknot/Pages/Main.aspx/wedding-boards_wedding-party_bm-gifts-20?plckFindPostKey=Cat:Wedding%20BoardsForum:37Discussion:fd18e1a7-72b5-436b-924a-2217dc7c5575Post:49b1f406-1a37-498b-9847-3301f1e8659b">Re: BM gifts</a>:
[QUOTE]Yes, it's a matter of them seeing it but they couldn't afford them. We saw some gorgeous, hideously expensive earrings and they all jumped up and down saying that they loved them, so I thought I'd surpsise them with it to wear on the day.
Posted by strazzypants[/QUOTE]

<div>So would you be upset if they didn't then wear it on your wedding day? If you wouldn't be mad then the gift is fine...but I don't think that's the case.</div><div>
</div><div>For me, I'm still lost on what to get my MOH...but as for my BM, one of them collects the Peanuts figurines from Hallmark (coincidentally, I got her started with that so she has received 4 from me already but for this she's getting their most expensive piece for being my BM). Another I'm stalking her Pinterest and she's pinned a few necklaces on Etsy so I'm going to purchase a couple I think since they don't appear to be too pricey. My last BM is going to be getting a gift certificate to a local winery, I think...</div>

Peledreamsofrain · February 2013

In Response to <a href="http://forums.theknot.com/Sites/theknot/Pages/Main.aspx/wedding-boards_wedding-party_bm-gifts-20?plckFindPostKey=Cat:Wedding%20BoardsForum:37Discussion:fd18e1a7-72b5-436b-924a-2217dc7c5575Post:1b15ac79-af02-4db8-a0a1-5ef5c5cb3417">Re: BM gifts</a>:
[QUOTE]In Response to Re: BM gifts : So would you be upset if they didn't then wear it on your wedding day? If you wouldn't be mad then the gift is fine...but I don't think that's the case. For me, I'm still lost on what to get my MOH...but as for my BM, one of them collects the Peanuts figurines from Hallmark (coincidentally, I got her started with that so she has received 4 from me already but for this she's getting their most expensive piece for being my BM). Another I'm stalking her Pinterest and she's pinned a few necklaces on Etsy so I'm going to purchase a couple I think since they don't appear to be too pricey. My last BM is going to be getting a gift certificate to a local winery, I think...
Posted by mlg78[/QUOTE]

<div>OP, please read this post, then read it again. These are what GIFTS look like. These are items that are all about the receiver, and have nothing to do with self-pleasing in the giver. These are perfect. No props, no selfishness, real honest to god gifts.</div>

strazzypants · February 2013

In Response to <a href="http://forums.theknot.com/Sites/theknot/Pages/Main.aspx/wedding-boards_wedding-party_bm-gifts-20?plckFindPostKey=Cat:Wedding%20BoardsForum:37Discussion:fd18e1a7-72b5-436b-924a-2217dc7c5575Post:e06012aa-c794-46ee-b0a0-c0b0fde338eb">Re:BM gifts</a>:
[QUOTE]That's like a husband buying his wife a mop. Arguing that it's an expensive mop doesn't make the 'gift' any less selfish.
Posted by Peledreamsofrain[/QUOTE]

<div>In this case, the wife picked out the mop and said, "Oh,this mop is amazing - the sparkliest, greatest mop of all time!" and then pinned it insisting that, again, it's the best mop ever. They could pick out some other accessories to wear and then I could gift them this jewelry which they can then choose to wear on the wedding day if they want to (or not, no big deal), but I just feel like then they'd be like, "Well, why didn't you tell me? I wouldn've have gone out shopping if I'd known I was getting the mop!" I also see it as taking the burden off of having them purchase yet another thing for an outfit they'll need for one day. </div><div>
</div><div>At this point, I'm paying for my bridesmaids' hotel, transportation, and was thinking to add beautiful accessories (that they picked out and they wouldn't have been able to afford otherwise) to try and make their lives easier because they've done so much for me. </div>

AddieCake · February 2013

In Response to <a href="http://forums.theknot.com/Sites/theknot/Pages/Main.aspx/wedding-boards_wedding-party_bm-gifts-20?plckFindPostKey=Cat:Wedding%20BoardsForum:37Discussion:fd18e1a7-72b5-436b-924a-2217dc7c5575Post:00725b03-2a5b-48c4-b64d-bbe3e9fc1186">Re: BM gifts</a>:
[QUOTE]Would you have bought that for them for their birthday? If so. Then ok, I suppose, but you need to take your wedding completely out of the question.
Posted by Domino04[/QUOTE]

<div>This exactly. </div>

Belais · February 2013

strazzypants: Private Messaged you

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