My mother and my Gma have been arguing over my wedding for the past week or so.
When I first got engaged, and started planning my wedding my mother had told me that we could use her backyard to host the wedding and all related parties. I was ecstatic; it’s a large and beautiful yard! About two weeks ago she told me that she didn’t want the wedding in her yard because “It will ruin the yard.” and because she “doesn’t want strangers in her yard.” Sure, I was upset, but I just started calling venues and tried not to let it bother me.
My grandma on the other hand is furious. She called my mother screaming at her because she “went back on her word.” She fumed about how my mother has done nothing for me since my brothers were born. (They are 17 and I’m 22.) Shen went on about how she should let me use the backyard, and how it’s only one day, and yadda yadda. Now my mother and my Gma are not talking because of this.
My mother wants me to elope because that’s what she and my dad did. She wants nothing to do with my wedding, she claims to hate my SO, and the only reason she paid for my wedding dress was because my Gma guilt tripped her into it. She is upset that my SO’s parents are not planning an engagement party. (His father lives in a one room apartment in the city, and his mother is estranged.) My grandma offered to host it. We said yes.
She told me at lunch today that we should just have a courthouse wedding then go out for dinner with the families. I said “The only way that would even happen was if you were paying for the wedding. You aren’t paying, so you don’t get to call the shots.” She was p*ssed. I’m sorry, but just because you didn’t have a wedding doesn’t mean I don’t want one.
It’s been so stressful, and I’m trying my hardest to remain calm…. I just want to cry.
Thanks for letting me vent once again. I don’t really have anyone else that I can turn to anymore.
Its not the destination so much as the journey, they say. - Captain Jack Sparrow
