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Bridesmaids/Sister DRAMA XP

lynzebokmanlynzebokman member
First Comment
in Moms and Maids
Ok, Here is the situation.. what would YOU do???

I have four bridesmaid in my wedding
Maid of Honor - Best Friend
#1 - Friend
#2 - Friend and Grooms Cousin
#3 -  Friend and Grooms Cousin

My fiance (groom) has two sisters and one brother. The brother is in the wedding. The other two sisters arent.

Let me tell you why:
They were not asked to be in the wedding because they have told the Groom (my fiance) they they dont like me and dont want to be friends with me. They only want to be in HIS wedding. not OURS. They never call us, they never want to hang out or anything.

NOW... they are complaining because we didnt included them in the wedding and throwing a HUGE fit and making a HUGE drama situation.

Would you include them in your wedding after they have told you that they dont like you?
What would you do?
Any inputs would be helpful!!
Thank you!
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Re: Bridesmaids/Sister DRAMA XP

  • SSaltzman87SSaltzman87 member
    2500 Comments Third Anniversary
    edited December 2011
    I can see two sides to this- one that you should include them to save yourself from any future drama, and two, that you should only include those that are close to you and who YOU want to stand with you. 

    I personally think you should only have people up there whom you're close to and that love and care for you. That's the whole point of having a WP in the first place. They sound like the type to make mountains out of ant hills. However, there is the option of having them stand on FI's side, they wouldn't necessarily have to stand with you.

    How does your FI feel about this?
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  • lynzebokmanlynzebokman member
    First Comment
    edited December 2011

    We didnt include them because of the fact that the people who are standing up with us on our wedding day are people who love and care and want the best for the BOTH of us. Not just one.

    Do you mean have the girls stand on the grooms men side?

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  • Summer2011BrideSummer2011Bride member
    5000 Comments Third Anniversary 25 Love Its Combo Breaker
    edited December 2011
    I answered you on WP.


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  • em01092em01092 member
    1000 Comments
    edited December 2011
    I answered on WP. 

    Hint: Put "XP" for cross post in your post title so people know you asked on multiple boards. A lot of us frequent more than one! 
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  • vicki0508vicki0508 member
    1000 Comments 5 Love Its Combo Breaker
    edited December 2011
    You'll have to deal with them for the rest of your lives, so I think FI should have them stand up on his side.
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  • grcrociogrcrocio member
    10 Comments
    edited December 2011

    I think you should should only include the people that care about you and you FI. They are just going to end up making more drama for you on your wedding day. If they tell you anything just let them how you feel. It is your wedding not theirs.Kiss

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  • KnibletKniblet member
    2500 Comments
    edited December 2011
    [QUOTE]I think you should should only include the people that care about you and you FI. They are just going to end up making more drama for you on your wedding day. If they tell you anything just let them how you feel. It is your wedding not theirs.
    Posted by grcrocio[/QUOTE]
    But what's worse?  A little drama on ONE day or a lot of drama for years to come?  They WILL be family after the wedding, after all.  It's about picking your battles and deciding what is worse.

    I agree with PP... have FI let them stand on his side.
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  • juliu1jejuliu1je
    10 Comments
    edited December 2011

    This is a really hard decision. My Fiance has a sister that is really snotty and a spoiled brat.  If things don't go her way she makes everyones lives hell until she gets her way.  Every cell in my body did not want her anywhere near me while I was getting married, but my inlaws were really worried about it because they thought that if I didn't ask her she would never speak to my fiance again.  I though that was plain rediculous....no wonder she is a spoiled brat!  My fiance felt really bad about the whole thing and was really stressed about it.  I  would have rather taken a football in the mouth, but I decided to ask her.  I did it for the sake of my fiance and his family.  The inlaws GUARANTEED that she wouldn't get out of hand so I have their word.  If she acts up I get to kick her out.  Also I told my other bridesmaids about her and to be on the lookout for drama.  They said they will keep her away from me and if she steps out of line they will kick her ass.  I am not really going to include her in any decision making or anything like that.  She is basically just going to show up to the wedding in the dress.  She is having people fill out applications on facebook for who get to be her date lol, so she will probably be too distracted to worry about being involved with everything.  Now the inlaws are happy, my fiance is happy, his snot-nose sister has no reason to resent us for the rest of our lives, and I might finally get to smack her when she steps out of line like I have wanted to do for so long ;)

    Don't worry, it will all work out.  Give it some time if you need to to think about it. Including them could lift the tension between you, but if you really don't feel comfortable, it is what it is.  Either way they are going to be at the wedding it sounds like so you might have to put up with some attitude.  The attitudes might be better though if they are wearing the dress. It also might be better also because you can be done with this decision and move on to planning the rest of the wedding without the negativity.  Its all about the battles you wanna pick.

    Good luck!!

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