Almost half not coming?

sasha213sw · July 2012

I am having a little bit of a panic attack rigth now because we had invited 223 people but only we have only 125 yes rsvp's. Out of the people left to respond, we will maybe end up with 16 yes rsvp's so that is going to be 141...our ballroom is able to fill 400 so that will be A LOT of empty space....our tables seat 8 but I'm emailing the event person to see if we can seat 6 at a table to try and take up more room...

I think I'm so upset because FI and I kept cutting and cutting our list to keep cost down and now it looks like all it will get us it an empty room. Our final payments are due within the next week or so and I would assume we would have to adjust all the totals we gave to our vendors because our numbers are so far off the original estimates we gave to them.....

Sorry to rant, I've been up since about 6 am thinking about this. Grrr....

kap617 · July 2012

I'm totally in your same place. We invited 196 and will only have about 115 in attendance. Our wedding is semi destination (we live in PA, and that's where his family and most ofour friends are, but the wedding is in CA, where I am from, and where most of my family is).

We thought we might have somewhere in the 140ish range, so 115 is sort of a disappointment (even though I originally wanted a smaller wedding... and still do!). I think of the people we cut from the list because we were afraid of having too many--I wish we could just go back and invite them now!

libby2483 · July 2012

Don't feel bad. If you have 140 people come, you still have over 60 percent attendance. Our venue told us that 65-70 percent is pretty typical. And I think your idea of seating fewer people at each table is a great one. I think that your guests will appreciate having some extra space versus being very crowded. And think of all the money you can save on food. Most importantly, remember that you will be celebrating with those that are closest to you, and at the end of the day, you will still be married to your new husband!

RichNicci4211122 · July 2012

We only had about a 60% acceptance rate too. Our venue told us that too, and they were right. With summer vactions, our wedding is on a Friday many people weren't able to take the time off, and a lot of family reunions we had quite a few No's. But that's ok, we paid off the reception months ago and now we are getting a refund that we are going to use towards the rehearsal dinner, which is a big sigh of relief since money seems to be extremely tight these last few weeks. Like PP said the most important thing is that you will be celebrating with those who are truely close to you and at the end of the day you will be husband and wife. Enjoy and don't worry about the guest list so much.

texasgurly13 · July 2012

My RSVP deadline is today and I'm still missing 50ish response cards (97 ppl), we originally thought we were gonna have 150 with all the people we invited, and we'll be lucky to hit 100, which is the minimum for our venue. It's frustrating and disappointing. Our venue can seat up to 250 comfortably, and there is gonna be a lot of empty space.

Eyejewel · July 2012

Yeah its nicer on the budget but i know what you mean we cut soo many people and then alot more declinded. Invited 203 got 150 but only 125 at rsvp time. Quite a few people just dont get back to you.

megan8290 · July 2012

Just mentally be prepared. More than half of people declined to our wedding.

Ajoyd · July 2012

I'm not sure I would seat six per table. Imagine if you had a few no shows, a table of four would look really sparse.

I would ask the venue to leave lots of space in between the tables. Venues can be somewhat dense when it comes to that and might pack all of the tables together even though it's not necessary (I used to be an event planner and had this happen--I made them spread the tables out!)

I'm sorry you're in this situation, it is disappointing when people can't come. We still have a couple of days until our RSVP deadline and we're missing 27 RSVP cards. I'm guessing at least half of those will be no's.

sasha213sw · July 2012

Thanks everyone. I thought about it off and on yesterday and talked to a few of my bridesmaids - they pointed out that I'm going to be saving so much money by having all those no rsvp's and also at the end of the day, I'm marrying FI so what does it matter?

You guys are all so right and thanks for the comforting words!

transcriber87 · July 2012

I am almost in the same boat but in 2 days it went in the opposite direction and it could change by the wedding..It totally disappoints me that of the 80+ invites we sent out, we have only gotten 19 cards back! After spending this week calling all the others, we got 17 verbals and 20 that hasnt wrote back or called back..But we have gotten cards with BIG numbers, there are 4 families alone that have 5, 6 and 7 people on them! And of those 20 that we havent heard back from, they are on my Dads side of the family! Mom paid for 100 guests yesterday which was our locked in price from March, she got home and redid the numbers for the kids over 3 and deducted the DJ & Photographer and that shot it up to 102 so WTH? So if the 20 people we cant get ahold of just show up, Mom will have to pay that night for the 20+...Im just going bonkers for real! Just last week we had like 45+ and this now? So don't be surprised if this week you hear from more people and when you do your calls if you do and find out..A TON of people just don't bother to send the card back, I am really thinking they might just need the stamp LOL!

calindi · July 2012

Sasha, you'd be surprised! Our venue swears it can seat 200 - we're glad that we're looking at having around 110 adults/teens (~8 young children) because many more would feel crowded! I'm sure they say 400 because they can squeeze that many in - your guests will be more spaciously spread out and comfortable.

Almost half not coming?

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