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October 2012 Weddings
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Disappointing

pzaveczpzavecz
100 Comments
in October 2012 Weddings
So our RSVP deadline was on Saturday.  After checking the mail today and seeing no RSVP cards, we started reaching out to all the people who had not RSVPed yet...which was over half of our guest list.  So far, everyone that we've got in contact with has declined.  :(  In a way, I'm glad because it cuts down on the number of people we're going to be paying for at the end of all of this but at the same time, I can't help but feel hurt and disappointed.  I mean, they were people we were invited for a reason.  Most people's reasons were due to money.  I'm bummed that they didn't find a way to save for it if they really wanted to attend.  They knew it about it months in advance (like 8-9 months when I sent STD's) so I was hoping a lot of guests would have enough time to plan and save, if necessary.  It sorta feels like we're not important enough to a lot of our guests for them to come to our wedding.  I know that's not the case (well I at least hope it isn't), and everyone's situation is different, but it still makes me sad.

This whole wedding has been making me more depressed than happy lately....Anyone else getting a little down in the dumps?  :(
Married since October 14, 2012 - Best Day Ever! Wedding-2
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Re: Disappointing

  • kimm260kimm260
    500 Comments
    I am feeling the same way.  We have had many that I was certain were going to be able to attend decline.  Just below half have said no and some have said yes and then have situations arise and have had to then decline.  We will have about 63 total guests out of 130 invited.  It hurts that they are not able to come.  It does get you thinking that they don't care enough to go but I have to keep telling myself that people have other things going on and it is not personal.

    I try to think of all the positives about having a smaller number.  We wil have a smaller venue bill, we have decided to add hot appetizers.  The recieving line will be shorter which allows us to have more time for pictures

    Try not to let it get your down  YOu will enjoy your wedding no matter who is there or not there!!.
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  • aro1589aro1589 member
    100 Comments Second Anniversary
    Awww pzavecz :(

    Looking at the positives isn't going to cheer you up until the big day.  BUT, when the big day comes you won't even be thinking about it.  you and FI will have such a lovely time mingling with the people who ARE there and enjoying your reception, you won't have time to think about those who couldn't come.

    I had a similar experience with my shower.  40 invited, about 15 came.  I was pretty diappointed.  I kept watching the door thinking people would show up late.  I only have one female relative in the area who isn't already in the wedding.  A cousin.  She didn't even come.  I was bummed.  But, when it was all said and done, I DID have a nice shower, I had fun with the guests who were there, and was able to crank all the thank you notes our in an evening lol

    try not to let it ruin the home stretch for you.  and I know this doesn't matter/won't make you feel better, but maybe those who declined will still send you gifts ;) haha
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  • mmmendimmmendi
    1000 Comments Combo Breaker
    I really think it is such a stressful time that it is natural to feel anxious for the finish line and even overwhelmed! I have about 45 confirmed right now. My RSVPs were due last week. We originally were looking at about 105 going out, and I still think we will have about 75. but they are all my family (and work. Thats most of my projection between 45 and 75. My team met FI, grilled him, and gave their approval!). I truly only feel badly that my groom doesn't have the luxury of support and love that I do. I would have been happy with my family ONLY (25 maybe) at my Mom's house, though. And, a little down that my Mom is so bent on me getting in to therapy ;)

    Heavens, I am rambling like an idiot.

    Try to take a breather. There is so much to do. It is crunch time. Choose your battles and pick your focus! It really is disappointing that everyone cannot make it. Remember (and I am trying to word this so it doesn't sound disagreeable!) that this day isn't their priority as much as it yours. You have been planning for weeks, months, maybe more :) They have other life events that may be in conflict. It isn't that they don't want to be there, it just isn't working out. KWIM?
    ~~Mendi~~ ...Everyone has their price; mine's chocolate Photobucket
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