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Strange thing I noticed.....

My husband left for Brazil on Tuesday, so I'm all alone now.  Sadly, my insomnia has returned, and it's been so hard for me to sleep.  I noticed that when my husband was away during spring break, I again had insomnia.  I also had horrible insomnia before marriage when I was living alone.  I don't know what it is, but I think living with my husband has had a calming effect on disruptive sleep.  Nothing I do is helping now... I've gone on walks and done stretches before bed, taken showers (no bathtub), watched relaxing TV shows... and this insomnia is awful.  Has anyone had this before?  I don't know what to do about it.... I'm super exhausted.....

Re: Strange thing I noticed.....

  • GunzNRoses213GunzNRoses213 member
    100 Comments
    edited June 2012
    have you tried a light sleepy pill ? or theres this lotion at bath n body works i think thats called sleep and it has lavender etc in it ... try infomercials or a really boring movie...

    sometimes if i work 2nd shift I cant get to sleep till 1 or 2 ... I just try reading or doing something normal till I feel tired , then I sleep ...
    Love is All You Need
  • My psychiatrist prescribed me trazodone.  It's not like other sleepy meds where people sleep walk and eat.

    Melatonin can help too, if you're consistent with it.

    I don't sleep as well when DH isn't in bed with me.  Also, I don't consume caffeine after 5PM.
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  • I don't have any advice (maybe drink some warm milk before bed) but I just wanted to send hugs and vibes. Hope you feel better ASAP!

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  • Thanks for those suggestions. Unfortunately, I can't do melatonin because it is too harsh on my stomach and causes me bad pain. But I am just amazed at how much an effect a spouse has. I never realized it... Would be curious if others go through it, too.
  • I know the few times I've had to sleep apart from my husband since we've been married I've tossed and turned and had a hard time falling asleep. Is it like you just can't sleep at all, or is it that you are having a hard time falling asleep at a decent hour?
  • I had insomnia all through school. I finally kicked it when I got my own apartment. Here's the standard, no-pills advice, which I was only able to implement when I got my own place:

    1. Have a dedicated room for sleep. Don't read in bed. Don't even read in the bedroom. [This is what was impossible when I lived in dorms.]
    2. Go to bed and get up at the same time every day. [Also hard with class schedules where my day could start between 8am and 1pm and end between 3pm and 11pm.]
    3. Have your sleep place as dark as possible.
    4. Exercise regularly.

    The standard food/caffeine/alcohol advice didn't work for me.
    Alcohol: It's in my system for 6 hours, and then I get like a sugar high. So, a glass of wine at 6pm will have me wide-awake at midnight, and so forth.
    Caffeine: Standard advice is no caffeine after noon. I can have coffee up to 6 hours before bedtime. I can have soda at bed time.
    Food: Standard advice is only a light snack within an hour of bed time. I have to have a fairly full stomach to get to sleep easily. I also take medications that make me nauseous right before bed, so I can sleep through the nausea. The more in my stomach, the slower the nausea comes on.
  • i think it's sad that you can't sleep without your husband but it's also so sweet.  i don't have any advice for you, but I'll be praying you find peace and sleep!

  • I'm worried that having to learn to sleep next to my FI will make my fairly mild insomnia worse.  I usually can't sleep well with another person too near (such as when sleeping over at friends' houses when I was younger.)

    I'm sorry about your sleep troubles, but it makes me feel a little better knowing that I might do better and not worse when I'm next to him.

    Sorry I don't have a real helpful answer, since I have insomnia problems myself that have not responded to anything besides 'get so exausted I no choice but to sleep' or 'whatever is stressing me is resolved'.
  • I have noticed the same thing when my H is gone.  I get worried/more nervous about people breaking in and I get up in the night and wander around and check the doors and make sure everything is locked, turn on the outside lights to see if I see anyone... I think it's normal!  I know it's overboard/paranoia but I often pile things in front of the doors and make sure everything is locked at night, it helps me sleep a bit better.  And invest in a good deadbolt!  It's all psychological so whatever helps you sleep through the night.

    Also I *try* to keep to a schedule, even though we talk at strange times of day and it's sometimes hard being in (slightly different) time zones.

  • When I lived in the dorm at college, I noticed that I didn't sleep very well if my roommate was gone and luckily I haven't had to deal with having H gone yet but for me, having another person in the room with me is very soothing. I hope you find another way to help with your insomnia.
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  • I'm sorry, I don't have advice, but I'm sorry you're going through this. I sleep great, but am always tired for some reason. I've had sleep studies done, blood work, etc, and they say everything is normal. I don't know why I'm tired so much. I will pray for you!
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