Wedding Dress Advice

Hazel_B · July 2011

A couple months ago I put a deposit down on a sample dress. I hadn't planned on looking at dresses that day, but I was with friends and found something I liked. This salon is really flexible and said I can transfer/ refund the deposit if I change my mind.

This weekend both my mom and FI's mom are visiting and I wanted to take them to see the dress. Since my mom hasn't gone dress shopping with me at all I wanted to share the experience with her and try on some other dresses as well as the one I put a deposit on.

I'm nervous that I might find something I like better, maybe it is watching too much SYTTD and their rules have become iingrained in me. FWIW, FI doesn't think I should try on more dresses so I don't get confused or conflicted.

What do you think?

peekaboo2011 · July 2011

Honestly, if you feel like you need your mom to be there, then do it. We had a bride come in, pick her dress and put money down on it. Two weeks later she made another appointment with her mom. She told her consultant to throw some other dresses in to the mix with "the one" just so her mom could be part of the experience.

Her expression when she walked out of the dressing room in "the one" was so ecstatic that her mom cried. She told her mom later that she had already ordered the dress, and her mom was perfectly fine with it.

Normally, I tell brides that if they've found THE dress, to stop looking. There will always be more dresses, just like there will always be more men. But when you found your FI, you stopped looking. So, by the same token, when you find your dress, stop looking.

Beads921 · July 2011

I'd probably try more on - you never know what you'll find, and your mom might have good insights as well. It can't hurt, since the deposit can be transferred.

Hazel_B · July 2011

Peek - Yeah, that's the sort of plan I had in mind. My mom has seen online pics of the dress, but that was awhile ago, so chances are she's fuzzy on the details now.

Hazel_B · July 2011

Beads - Good point, I feel that I'm so far out and am not tied to the dress I have a deposit on that it doesn't really hurt to look at more. I'm limiting myself to this store because the dress isn't my biggest priority. Otherwise a search could go on forever, I'm not emotion so I doubt I'll cry just by trying on a wedding dress so there isn't much point in me searching for that reaction.

marleylikeair · July 2011

Haz, I think you should pick some other top contenders and throw them into the mix to show your mom, like the bride in peek's anecdote. In your OP, you actually sound a little ambivalent, like you're not quite sure this dress is THE dress. I know you said the dress isn't your top priority and you aren't necessarily the type to cry about it, but I think it should at least give you a warm, fuzzy feeling of "oooh, yeah, I'll love myself in this dress and I want to wear it on my big day." KWIM?

Beads921 · July 2011

I think Marley said it well - you should definitely seek out that awesome feeling you get when you know you look amazing in something (no tears necessary). Nothing wrong with limiting yourself to one store (it actually seems very sensible), but since you still have time, there's no point in limiting yourself to one dress.

kaitlynmichelle · July 2011

I agree, bring your mom with you and put the dress you have a deposit on with some other choices. If they are willing to transfer deposits, if you do change your mind at least you won't be losing money on it.

Although I agree with peek, normally I'd say stop looking so you don't end up with two dresses or losing a deposit.

Hazel_B · July 2011

Thanks everyone. I think it'll mean a lot to my mom and FI's mom if they are able to have the experience. I had originally planned on only shopping with my mom and possibly my sister. So, this works.

mattycam · July 2011

In Response to <a href="http://forums.theknot.com/Sites/theknot/Pages/Main.aspx/special-topic-wedding-boards_not-engaged-yet_wedding-dress-advice?plckFindPostKey=Cat:Special Topic Wedding BoardsForum:136Discussion:f7ed45ac-1747-4dfc-a8c4-8a43e5e0fb91Post:f1e4d9f4-6f2f-46ab-ae87-b04e6d147b0e">Re: Wedding Dress Advice</a>:
[QUOTE]I agree with peek in this instance, though I usually would say stop looking. Since your deposit can be transferred I don't see a downside. And it would be great for your mom to have that experience with you!
Posted by LivLeighton[/QUOTE]

I agree, it's a win-win in this instance plus you have lots of time before your big day so you have the flexibility to explore different ideas.

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