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August 2012 Weddings
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FMIL is guessing on her side

KSParker2012KSParker2012
100 Comments
in August 2012 Weddings
Ok I'm a little frustrated, so maybe you can help me figure out this situation.  Our RSVP date was yesterday so i've been asking people if they are coming or not.  Well I give my FMIL her list and she starts assuming.  Like "oh if you haven't heard then probably no they won't come"  I don't know if I am being super picky but I would like her to physically ask them and get a yes or a no.  My parents are paying for this and how much we pay depends on the number of people. I think its not that big of a deal to ask.  So how should I go about this.  Our venue needs a number by Wednesday.  She has plenty of time to call.  Help me!

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Re: FMIL is guessing on her side

  • [Deleted User][Deleted User]
    100 Comments
    Have FI ask her to physically contact those people, and explain you need an exact head count.
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  • m tullim tulli member
    100 Comments
    Can you just have your FI call his side? If she doesn't want to do it. I wouldn't push it.
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  • libby2483libby2483 member
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    I agree that they really should be contacted, especially if you are having a plated meal where an exact headcount is pretty important.  I agree with PP that perhaps your FI could contact these people.  That being said, we haven't heard from a few family friends or distant relatvies that my parents wanted us to invite (and we don't know all that well).  My mom volunteered to contact these people because she knew it would be easier.  If this is a similar situation, have your FI ask his mom again to call these people and stress how important it is.
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  • rungirl12rungirl12 member
    500 Comments Second Anniversary
    I would have FI ask her to call them.  If she won't, or puts up a fuss and wants you to just assume they're not coming, then I'd have him (or you if you've met them) call them.  That's really the only way to get an exact number.  
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  • DeClue82DeClue82
    500 Comments
    I have the same problem... Make her or FI actually call
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  • VNEluvsAJBVNEluvsAJB member
    100 Comments
    We had a similar problem and FI & his mom kept saying "well they probably won't come then" so I ended up having to contact people I really don't know and I'm glad I did. A bunch of them are coming. Someone should call and ask or you may have some unexpected guests on the day of.
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  • calindicalindi member
    5000 Comments Second Anniversary Combo Breaker
    Have your FI ask his Mom for phone numbers, then have him call them and get a definitive "yes or no".

    My FMIL told my Mom she was bringing "approximately 6-8 family members" to my shower.  Guess how many showed up besides herself?  1.  Yep.  Just one.  So... exact numbers can save money!

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