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Christian Weddings
harpsdesire
member
Is a Handfasting unity ceremony appropriate for Christians getting married?
I was considering a handfasting as a unity ceremony because I thought it would be meaningful for my FI, who is very interested in and connected to his Scottish heritage. I also come from Irish and Scottish background although it is not a huge part of my life.
I am a little concerned that it is too much connected with Pagan and Wiccan marriage ceremonies (and it did indeed originate in pre-Cristian days), although the majority of wording options to be read during the actual tying of cords is just unity-related and not religiously-specific. At least that's what I found when googling it.
There are also specifically Christian readings for handfasting available online, but I would rather skip it or do a different unity ceremony if it would be religiously insensitive or offensive to either Christian guests (the majority I think) or our guests of other varied religions.
I am a little concerned that it is too much connected with Pagan and Wiccan marriage ceremonies (and it did indeed originate in pre-Cristian days), although the majority of wording options to be read during the actual tying of cords is just unity-related and not religiously-specific. At least that's what I found when googling it.
There are also specifically Christian readings for handfasting available online, but I would rather skip it or do a different unity ceremony if it would be religiously insensitive or offensive to either Christian guests (the majority I think) or our guests of other varied religions.
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Re: Is a Handfasting unity ceremony appropriate for Christians getting married?
I like the thought behind your answer, that is a good point!
So, I don't think it's "offensive" to "Christians," if it's something routine for Anglicans and Catholics.
TLDR: I agree with Drama.
[QUOTE]I don't really know what a handfasting is, and no, I'm not going to spend 30 seconds googling it. I understand it involves tying the bride and groom's hands together. I don't think this is REQUIRED in Anglican/Catholic (or mine, Anglican Catholic) ceremonies, but it is a <strong>sub-tradition for the Priest to tie the 2 right hands together with his stole</strong>. We have to basically shake hands 2 or 3 times in our Anglican ceremony. So, I don't think it's "offensive" to "Christians," if it's something routine for Anglicans and Catholics. TLDR: I agree with Drama.
Posted by ElisabethJoanne[/QUOTE]
This is one of my favorite parts of the ceremony! We had a traditional Episcopalian ceremony.
[QUOTE]Ultimately,<strong> I would just consult with your priest/pastor. He/she will provide the best guidance as to what is allowed and what is not. I find it hard to guess what is appropriate in these situations on my own. </strong>
Posted by GJones27[/QUOTE]
<div>agree</div>
My friend was raised part jewish/part protestant but she had her Rabi do the ceremony that was both jewish/christian [messianic jewish so technically it was relativly the same ] .. I liked it and I understood why she did it that way...
As long as you are doing something based your on beliefs and values it wouldnt be offensive since yes most Christian "holidays" were Paganistic at one time aka Christmas was actually in the spring ... that type of thing ...
I think as long as you had an appropriate explanation in your program you would be fine. If I didn't know it corrected to your heritage I might be offended.
Married! May 27th, 2012
From my perspective, I think its a beautiful part of a ceremony, and a great opportunity to add a personal flavour to the day with your own handfasting cords.
Maybe if you told people beforehand what you had planned, even put together a short couple of paragraphs explaining what handfasting is and why its important to you, I'd hope that the people who care about you would respect your wishes enough to understand, and maybe even be a little curious to see a handfasting for themselves :-)
Having said that, I agree with PP about talking with your officiant and getting a sense of your local community. If it's an important part of your FI's culture, just be really clear in the program about the "what" and "why" and be careful/deliberate with your terminology.
I'm not familiar with the wrapping-hands-with-stole tradition and it sounds lovely. Consider it prayerfully, seek counsel, and if you decide to have one, do it with rejoicing before the Lord in the name of Jesus!