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I'm So Confused!

JT13181JT13181
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in Wedding Reception Forum

My fiancé wants to get married in the Bahamas with no family or friends present. I'm not completely okay with the idea but I'm compromising. My dilemma is that I still want my family and friends to be involved in some way; so I came up with the idea to have a "pre reception party" . I figured we could still do the traditional things like a bacheorette/ bacheolor party or bridal shower, and then the party right before we leave for our private ceremony out of the country. We don't live near family and I don't believe anyone would show up if we have the bachelorette party etc. before the wedding and then the reception after we get back. It would be so expensive to make multiple trips here. Is it a stupid idea to have our reception before the wedding?

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Re: I'm So Confused!

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    JT13181JT13181
    First Comment
    We had to push our date back... I thought I updated my profile. Weird. We got pregnant and we are now back on the wedding track.

    In Response to <a href="http://forums.theknot.com/Sites/theknot/Pages/Main.aspx/wedding-boards_reception-ideas_im-so-confused?plckFindPostKey=Cat:Wedding%20BoardsForum:5Discussion:20c68ebc-9d3f-428a-a69d-0cf4904d63b7Post:b3fd4ac1-4636-43c6-a431-458ed5526908">Re: I'm So Confused!</a>:
    [QUOTE]According to your profile, you're already married. Now I'm confused.
    Posted by TXKristan[/QUOTE]
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    JT13181JT13181
    First Comment
    This is what marriage is all about I guess... I really want the traditional wedding. He really doesn't. Is there a compromise for that?
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    GoodLuckBear14GoodLuckBear14 member
    First Anniversary 5 Love Its Combo Breaker First Comment
    edited February 2013
    In Response to <a href="http://forums.theknot.com/Sites/theknot/Pages/Main.aspx/wedding-boards_reception-ideas_im-so-confused?plckFindPostKey=Cat:Wedding BoardsForum:5Discussion:20c68ebc-9d3f-428a-a69d-0cf4904d63b7Post:29b691a1-536a-4ce5-afb0-28c5f93aa289">Re: I'm So Confused!</a>:
    <div align="left">[QUOTE]This is what marriage is all about I guess... I really want the traditional wedding. He really doesn't. Is there a compromise for that?
    Posted by JT13181[/QUOTE]

    Yes.  You find a happy medium between the extremes of big traditional wedding and an elopement.  Marriage is not about giving in to what the other one wants, it is finding something that makes you both happy.  Like Lia said, have a small traditional wedding.</div>
    Proud to be an old married hag!! image
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    winelover123winelover123 member
    5 Love Its First Anniversary First Comment First Answer
    In Response to <a href="http://forums.theknot.com/Sites/theknot/Pages/Main.aspx/wedding-boards_reception-ideas_im-so-confused?plckFindPostKey=Cat:Wedding%20BoardsForum:5Discussion:20c68ebc-9d3f-428a-a69d-0cf4904d63b7Post:29b691a1-536a-4ce5-afb0-28c5f93aa289">Re: I'm So Confused!</a>:
    [QUOTE]This is what marriage is all about I guess... I really want the traditional wedding. He really doesn't. Is there a compromise for that?
    Posted by JT13181[/QUOTE]

    Can you compromise on a small destination wedding? Get married in the Bahamas like he wants and invite close family and friends. If you do that though, anyone invited to the pre-wedding parties must be invited to the wedding. Alternatively, you could have the traditional wedding, keeping it relatively small, and honeymoon in the Bahamas. I wanted a small destination wedding and FI wants an at home wedding, so we're doing the at-home wedding but honeymooning in Hawaii. We're also taking our wedding outfits and doing portraits in Hawaii so I at least get the awesome pictures :)
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    Alex3MomAlex3Mom member
    First Anniversary 5 Love Its First Comment
    Lia said it for me also.  My wedding was primarily a very lovely dinner party with pretty clothes.  Our ceremony took about ten minutes; the rest was party, and our guests are still talking about what a "beautiful wedding" it was more than two years later. 
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    erinlin25erinlin25 member
    First Anniversary 5 Love Its First Answer First Comment
    have a small wedding at home where you can invite friends/family so you can have a reception for them and maybe a bachelorette & bridal shower IF they are of course thrown for you (can't throw your own).  And then you and your hubby can honeymoon in the Bahama's.
    image

    Anniversary
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    sabrinalesliesabrinaleslie
    First Comment First Anniversary
    <div>I totally agree with this! My Fi is the same way as your husband. We are going to have just a huge party and a very short ceremony. We both love it.</div><div>
    </div>In Response to <a href="http://forums.theknot.com/Sites/theknot/Pages/Main.aspx/wedding-boards_reception-ideas_im-so-confused?plckFindPostKey=Cat:Wedding%20BoardsForum:5Discussion:20c68ebc-9d3f-428a-a69d-0cf4904d63b7Post:262b97e3-857b-4c41-8ecc-c9a66cf2af78">Re: I'm So Confused!</a>:
    [QUOTE]In Response to Re: I'm So Confused! : Small tradtional wedding? I think it depends on what he doesn't like about the traditional wedding. My H really hates being the center of attention or speaking in public, but loves a party. We had a quick 10 minute ceremony, and then a regualr reception, and he was much happier with that than with standing in front of people for a hour long ceremony.
    Posted by Liatris2010[/QUOTE]
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