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Just Engaged and Proposals

Can't Delete This :p

Don't want responses anymore. Thanks!
"It's not going to be easy. It's going to be really hard. We're gonna have to work at this everyday, but I want to do that because I want you. I want all of you, forever, you and me, everyday."

Re: Can't Delete This :p

  • I don't think you should be asking Internet strangers What to do ... If you two can't decide yourself maybe it's best to wait until your a little more mature
  • Are you two able to financially stand on your own?  Have you and your FI talked about marriage (not the wedding but actual marriage), finances, kids, what the two of you want in life?

    It's hard without knowing you personally to say if you're ready for marriage but I usually ask what the rush is.  If you two know that you want to be together for the rest of your lives then why not take a little more time to mature.  So many things change in your early 20s.

    DH and I started dating when we were 16.  We stayed together all throughout college, moved across country together, and lived together for a few years.  We became engaged when we were 26.  We changed a lot during those years.  Luckily we changed together and our relationship became stronger but a lot of couples don't.  I'm not saying to wait years like we did but it's something to think about.
    Ignorance is a poor defense. Image and video hosting by TinyPic
  • It's not that we aren't mature. We have both calculated what our financial status would be and we have talked about children, where we want to live, etc. We both feel like we're ready but that's why we're going to live together and be engaged for a year so we can make sure we really are. The reason I'm asking "internet stragners" was because I was seeking advice of other brides. Maybe ones who are in my shoes or aren't but have helpful points to make.
    "It's not going to be easy. It's going to be really hard. We're gonna have to work at this everyday, but I want to do that because I want you. I want all of you, forever, you and me, everyday."
  • In Response to <a href="http://forums.theknot.com/Sites/theknot/Pages/Main.aspx/wedding-boards_just-engaged-proposals_too-young-or-just-right?plckFindPostKey=Cat:Wedding%20BoardsForum:683Discussion:8af9e9b4-a7cc-43e9-be78-12a840e0d59fPost:cd3702b3-e9f9-4ba6-b8e1-7cba7a22f1eb">Re: Too young or just right?</a>:
    [QUOTE]It's not that we aren't mature. <strong>We have both calculated what our financial status would be</strong> and we have talked about children, where we want to live, etc. We both feel like we're ready but that's why we're going to live together and be engaged for a year so we can make sure we really are. The reason I'm asking "internet stragners" was because I was seeking advice of other brides. Maybe ones who are in my shoes or aren't but have helpful points to make.
    Posted by J&T=1207[/QUOTE]
    What does this mean?  Are you two financially independent (as in, you're not receiving help from any parents)? 
    Ignorance is a poor defense. Image and video hosting by TinyPic
  • I can sort of relate to you. Me and my fiance have know each other since 7th grade. We "dated" if you want to call it that lol at the end of our 8th grade year. We officially stated dating our senior year in May. We talked about getting engaged and married but at that time around your age we knew that we were not finacially stable. We are 23 so only 3 years older than y'all. Now we have been engaged since July last year 2011 and are planning our wedding for this November. We are finacially stable and independent and ready for everything to fall into place. I believe that if we were to have gotten married at 20 we would not be in a good situation finalicaly and I know for some couples that could cause problems and for some not. I don't know if we would've have problems due to lack of money and I'm not saying that y'all would have problems either, but I'm glad we didn't at that time. We both even worked but our income together wouldn't have been enough without help. Now we are more than ready (with better paying jobs) to finally be married to each other and the time waiting has made us even more excited, brought us closer together, and able to provide more for our wedding and things we want to do! I know money isn't everything and age is just a number but we weren't comfortable having to rely on our parents being a married couple. I hope this helps and gives you some advice.
  • Well, I honestly think it would be best to wait. Or to live together for a while before getting engaed. That being said, I need to be completely honest. My fiance and I started living together within a few weeks of dating and have been inseperable ever since. We've been together for a few years now and have lived together the whole time; I think for most people that wouldn't work. We've moved around together and are now most likely moving across the country together. BUT we both have been able to financially support ourselves the entire time, we split bills but share no bank accounts.  We both know what we want in live and neither of us are willing to give up having kids, or acheiving out career goals; luckily our values and goals are perfectly aligned. There's no one "right" way to do it but I do think in general that going slowly is more beneficial in the end.
  • I can't see your OP, but I honestly believe if you have to even ask, then yes, you are too young.
    Anniversary
  • Honestly, if you have to ask, then the answer is no.
    I french with my man
    Daisypath Anniversary tickers
  • In Response to <a href="http://forums.theknot.com/Sites/theknot/Pages/Main.aspx/wedding-boards_just-engaged-proposals_too-young-or-just-right?plckFindPostKey=Cat:Wedding%20BoardsForum:683Discussion:8af9e9b4-a7cc-43e9-be78-12a840e0d59fPost:cf37b6e9-c78c-4bd5-826b-4ebdd52466ee">Too young or just right?</a>:
    [QUOTE]My boyfriend and I have been best friends since 7th grade. Our senior year of high school we started dating and we are still together. We have been dating 2 years and 3 months. We are both turning 20 in a matter of weeks and we have been seriously talking about becoming "officially" engaged and moving in together and getting married next year. I'm nervous about what our family would think since we are both pretty young. What do you gals think?
    Posted by J&T=1207[/QUOTE]

    <div>
    </div><div>Honestly... *sigh*.. I was a young bride too.. But if you have to ask the internet of strangers if you're too young, you probably are. </div><div>I think that when I was 18 I was engaged to someone else and am so glad we didn't end up married. </div><div>I think that my husband dated his high school sweetheart for 5 years and they were not meant to be. Then he dated a college sweetheart for 3 years. And they were not meant to be. </div><div>
    </div><div>Read some of the guidelines that some of us wrote out regarding the thread "Too Soon? " for a better idea of what to consider about getting married. </div><div>I knew when I was twenty and met my now husband that he was the one. We knew almost immediately.. but there was no rush. We moved in, combined finances, did all the "married couple" stuff before talking marriage. We became a team in life. You need that with your partner. You can move in with him before you become "officially engaged". See how well you handle that life together. For us, moving in together was the easiest decision ever. I LOVE living with my husband (then boyfriend). Not ONCE did I think it was a pain.. We love it. And I'm glad we figured that out before we talked future.. It's a step in the direction of marriage, but don't feel like you have to take all steps all at once. </div>
  • In Response to <a href="http://forums.theknot.com/Sites/theknot/Pages/Main.aspx/wedding-boards_just-engaged-proposals_too-young-or-just-right?plckFindPostKey=Cat:Wedding%20BoardsForum:683Discussion:8af9e9b4-a7cc-43e9-be78-12a840e0d59fPost:cf37b6e9-c78c-4bd5-826b-4ebdd52466ee">Can't Delete This :p</a>:
    [QUOTE]Don't want responses anymore. Thanks!
    Posted by J&T=1207[/QUOTE]

    <div>
    </div><div>Aaaand now you REALLY know you aren't ready, if you can't handle opinions other than what you were wanting to hear. </div>
  • Immature brat
  • In Response to <a href="http://forums.theknot.com/Sites/theknot/Pages/Main.aspx/wedding-boards_just-engaged-proposals_too-young-or-just-right?plckFindPostKey=Cat:Wedding%20BoardsForum:683Discussion:8af9e9b4-a7cc-43e9-be78-12a840e0d59fPost:dd85e3b9-ca7f-4aab-9b05-50c701cc7d39">Re: Can't Delete This :p</a>:
    [QUOTE]Immature brat
    Posted by Kristin1117[/QUOTE]
    Come on now.  There's no need for name calling.
    Ignorance is a poor defense. Image and video hosting by TinyPic
  • In Response to <a href="http://forums.theknot.com/Sites/theknot/Pages/Main.aspx/wedding-boards_just-engaged-proposals_too-young-or-just-right?plckFindPostKey=Cat:Wedding%20BoardsForum:683Discussion:8af9e9b4-a7cc-43e9-be78-12a840e0d59fPost:8e1c6e50-ffcb-4563-8bed-56bde5a8232c">Re: Can't Delete This :p</a>:
    [QUOTE]In Response to Can't Delete This :p : Aaaand now you REALLY know you aren't ready, if you can't handle opinions other than what you were wanting to hear. 
    Posted by firsttimersluck[/QUOTE]
    This. <div>
    </div><div>OP - I wasn't around for your OP but based on the quotes and your responses it really sounds like you're not ready to be married. I got engaged to someone I had been dating for 4 years when I was 21. We planned to have a long engagement (2.5 years). We made it 8 months. You change SO much in your early twenties and for a lot of people it just doesn't work. </div>
    image
    Anniversary
  • I've been with my highschool sweetheart for 3 and a half years now. We are engaged now, living together, and we have combined finances. Everything is wonderful!! We are both full time college students, and working full time also. I am 18 years old-he is 20. We plan on waiting until after we graduate college to get married. Its a personal choice, and both of our families agree to it as well. My advice to you, is that you need to sit down, and think it through. I know it doesn't sound wonderful for someone younger than you to give you advice, but advice is advice. The PP are right though, if you need to ask, you're not ready, not too young.
    He stole my heart, so I'm stealing his last name.
  • If you have to ask complete strangers whether or not you're ready to make a permanent, completely life-altering decision, you're not ready.

    *I felt sorry for my husband before I met him. Take a number.*
    image

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