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Junior BM in Processional?

Mattie LynnMattie Lynn
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in Moms and Maids
I have recently decided to have 2 junior BM.

My question is:
Is it ok that they are not in the processional?  I want them to feel included, but have no idea how to include thm in the processional.  One of the girls is my only niece, who is too big to be a flower girl (junior high) and the other is my younger cousin (high school freshman) who several people in my family have made a point of telling me that she looks up to me and is quietly dissapointed about not being in the wedding.  I am more than happy to have them both, but don't know what to do with them.  Thanks for your help!
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Re: Junior BM in Processional?

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    skippylouwhoskippylouwho member
    First Comment
    edited December 2011
    Why wouldn't they process down the aisle just like the bridesmaids. What else is the point? They sit in a pew in their pretty dresses that they paid a lot of money for?
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    MrsSilverwolfMrsSilverwolf
    First Comment
    edited December 2011
    I was a freshman in HS when I was in my sister's wedding and she just had me included in the processional.

    Are you worried about where to put them because there's no one on the groom's side to have them walk down with? Then just have them walk together or alone.
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    Mattie LynnMattie Lynn
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    edited December 2011
    In Response to <a href="http://forums.theknot.com/Sites/theknot/Pages/Main.aspx/special-topic-wedding-boards_moms-maids_junior-bm-processional?plckFindPostKey=Cat:Special Topic Wedding BoardsForum:357Discussion:3f379316-06d2-4605-9d08-c8b08f8ced8cPost:d44a6c31-304a-485a-9df7-813436f14d80">Re: Junior BM in Processional?</a>:
    [QUOTE]Why wouldn't they process down the aisle just like the bridesmaids. What else is the point? They sit in a pew in their <strong>pretty dresses that they paid a lot of money for</strong>?
    Posted by skippylouwho[/QUOTE]

    Thier dresses won't be expensive<em> at all</em>.  I was thinking more along the lines of ushers IF thats even appropriate.  I guess thats more of what I wanted to know
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    trix1223trix1223 member
    5 Love Its Combo Breaker First Comment
    edited December 2011
    What's the point of having them if they're not in the processional?  Because the whole point of a WP is to wear the attire, walk down the aisle, stand (or sit) respectfully for the ceremony, and smile for pictures.
    "Trix, it's what they/our parents wanted. Why so judgemental? And why is your wedding date over a year and a half ago? And why do you not have a groom's name? And why have you posted over 12,000 posts? And why do you always say mean things to brides?" palegirl146
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    Mattie LynnMattie Lynn
    First Comment
    edited December 2011
    In Response to <a href="http://forums.theknot.com/Sites/theknot/Pages/Main.aspx/special-topic-wedding-boards_moms-maids_junior-bm-processional?plckFindPostKey=Cat:Special Topic Wedding BoardsForum:357Discussion:3f379316-06d2-4605-9d08-c8b08f8ced8cPost:0dbff3d3-1726-47e7-b90f-24471cf21ce3">Re: Junior BM in Processional?</a>:
    [QUOTE]In Response to Junior BM in Processional? : All you do is have them walk down the aisle behind the other bridesmaids. <strong>I don't know what is confusing about that..</strong>?
    Posted by jamierobin[/QUOTE]

    Maybe it makes me sound dumb, but I've never been to a wedding with Junior BM. 
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    zitiqueenzitiqueen member
    First Answer First Anniversary 5 Love Its First Comment
    edited December 2011
    In Response to <a href="http://forums.theknot.com/Sites/theknot/Pages/Main.aspx/special-topic-wedding-boards_moms-maids_junior-bm-processional?plckFindPostKey=Cat:Special Topic Wedding BoardsForum:357Discussion:3f379316-06d2-4605-9d08-c8b08f8ced8cPost:e54477e6-b5b2-447a-89d1-2fc4c1bb35a7">Re: Junior BM in Processional?</a>:
    [QUOTE]In Response to Re: Junior BM in Processional? : Maybe it makes me sound dumb, but I've never been to a wedding with Junior BM. 
    Posted by Mattie Lynn[/QUOTE]

    How about just letting them be... bridesmaids? Not junior bridesmaids, unless you plan on referring to the rest of your bridal party as senior bridesmaids. Kids in junior high and high school don't like being considered children, and slapping the "junior" title on them does exactly that.
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    MairePoppyMairePoppy mod
    First Anniversary First Answer First Comment 5 Love Its
    edited December 2011
    There really isn't much point to the 'Junior' part of the title. Junior BMs and BMs do exactly the same thing. The high school aged girl probably won't appreciate being called Junior. Remember when you were that age?
    Usher is a non-gender specific role. So yes, they could be ushers.
                       
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    MrsSilverwolfMrsSilverwolf
    First Comment
    edited December 2011
    When I was in my sister's wedding, as a freshman, I was just termed a bridesmaid, not junior bridesmaid.

    And you could use them as ushers as well.
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    barbie92barbie92 member
    First Comment First Anniversary
    edited December 2011
    My Jr. BMs are in the processional because I want them to be. If you don't want them to walk down in the processional then don't give them the title jr. bridesmaids.

    I am only adding the junior part because two of the bridesmaids are their older sisters and I wanted the older ones to feel like their job sounded older ( they will be almost 13 and they are ready to grow up a little) Sounds silly but it works for them :)
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    gailpetegailpete member
    First Anniversary 5 Love Its Name Dropper Combo Breaker
    edited December 2011

    Girls that age will likely be wearing bridesmaids dresses, since most junior bridesmaids dresses are more appropriate for 10 year olds.  My 14 year old niece is a BM for my DD and the dress fits her great.  Just have them wear the same dress, call them bridesmaids and have them walk in the processional like all the other BMs.

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    KnibletKniblet member
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    edited December 2011
    My JR Bm's were 11 year old twins.  They walked down the aisle before the BM and MOH and they seemed to enjoy it.
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    seniahseniah
    First Comment
    edited December 2011

    If they are bridesmaids then they are part of the processional - otherwise what's the point?  They'll be hurt not to be included in that part.

    My DH's 3 nieces were our ushers (one jr. high, 2 high school) - they directed people where to sit, handed out programs, pulled the aisle runner, closed/opened/held the doors for my entrance, and then handed out the bubbles at the end.  They had a blast and did an awesome job.

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    beamer84beamer84 member
    First Comment
    edited December 2011
    A junior BM does everything a BM does except attend events that she is too young for (like the bach party). I had a junior BM, and she was part of the processional. She stood up there with me alongside my other BMs.
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    LilyWater09LilyWater09 member
    First Comment
    edited December 2011
    Having your two junior BMs not in the processional is your decision but my personal opinion is that not putting them in is insulting - no offense.  It is not the cost of items, but the symbolism of you having them asked them to be in it, then dressed and present, but not participating?  Feels kind of weird to read that.  Ultimately this is your big day - a day you should have without regrets.  Make a decision that wil make everyone happy - do not sweat the small stuff - this is the small stuff! 

    I am having my 2 nieces who will be 12 &13 at the time be my junior BMs, and a niece who will be 17 a full BM at my wedding.  All of them will proceed me down the aisle.  I plan to have a weekend getaway bachelorette party to a ski resort so they all can participate in the fun and excitement. 

    To make the junior BM feel even more special, I am going to take them shopping to pick their dresses and jewelery and decide on a hairstyle.  I also plan to have them with the wedding prep details.  Making them part of your wedding is not just a day-of-the-event thing - its a whole event thing.

    I could not imagine not having these three special and important people being there with me every step of the processes and then making their mark on the red carpet the day of.
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    trix1223trix1223 member
    5 Love Its Combo Breaker First Comment
    edited December 2011
    In Response to <a href="http://forums.theknot.com/Sites/theknot/Pages/Main.aspx/special-topic-wedding-boards_moms-maids_junior-bm-processional?plckFindPostKey=Cat:Special%20Topic%20Wedding%20BoardsForum:357Discussion:3f379316-06d2-4605-9d08-c8b08f8ced8cPost:7610a362-9466-411b-b99e-9a20157dcc1e">Re: Junior BM in Processional?</a>:
    [QUOTE]Having your two junior BMs not in the processional is your decision but my personal opinion is that not putting them in is insulting - no offense.  It is not the cost of items, but the symbolism of you having them asked them to be in it, then dressed and present, but not participating?  Feels kind of weird to read that.  <strong>Ultimately this is your big day</strong> - a day you should have without regrets.  Make a decision that wil make everyone happy - do not sweat the small stuff - this is the small stuff!  I am having my 2 nieces who will be 12 &13 at the time be my junior BMs, and a niece who will be 17 a full BM at my wedding.  All of them will proceed me down the aisle.  I plan to have a<strong> weekend getaway bachelorette party to a ski resor</strong>t so they all can participate in the fun and excitement.  To make the junior BM feel even more special, I am going to take them shopping to pick their dresses and jewelery and<strong> decide on a hairstyle</strong>.  I also plan to <strong>have them with the wedding prep details.  Making them part of your wedding is not just a day-of-the-event thing - its a whole event thing.</strong> I could not imagine not having these three special and important people being there with me every step of the processes and then <strong>making their mark on the red carpet the day of</strong>.
    Posted by LilyWater09[/QUOTE]

    Red carpet?  really?  And just for the record:  the "duties" of a BM are in fact, just on the day of the wedding.  They start and end with the ceremony.  They wear the attire, walk down the aisle, stand (or sit) respectfully for the ceremony, and smile for pictures.  They don't have to do any of the pre-wedding stuff that magazines, tv shows, and websites insist are part of their "job".

    And please, let them decide on their own hairstyles.  I'm not sure why you have to be there.  It sounds like you're choosing how their hair is done, and that's really inappropriate and unneccessary.

    As for the weekend ski vacation b-party.  You're not throwing that for yourself are you?  Because pre-wedding parties, including e-parties, showers, and b-parties are gifts to you and should not be something you throw for yourself.

    Do you know that everyone can afford a whole weekend at a ski resort?  That's pretty pricey.
    "Trix, it's what they/our parents wanted. Why so judgemental? And why is your wedding date over a year and a half ago? And why do you not have a groom's name? And why have you posted over 12,000 posts? And why do you always say mean things to brides?" palegirl146
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