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Rude for parents of bride or groom to host shower?

ali585ali585
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in Pre-wedding Parties
I was just invited to a friend's bridal shower, thrown by the mother of the groom. Another friend of mine who's invited mentioned that she thinks it's rude for any parent of the bride or groom to host a shower because it looks gift-grabby. 

I think that might have been true in the past, but it doesn't seem weird to me at all. What do you ladies think?
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Re: Rude for parents of bride or groom to host shower?

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    notyetavetnotyetavet
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    My mom is co-hosting my shower with my MOH with a marginal amount of input from FMIL.  As I understand it (I specifically said I just wanted to show up, I didn't want to know the details), my mom is paying for the food and such and my MOH is taking care of games or activities or whatever they have planned.  

    I think it's all about intent. My mom and MOH want to throw a nice party and FMIL wants me to get to know more of the women in the extended family. Neither one of them set out with gifts in mind.  

    I think it's fine, though I'm sure some hardcore traditionalists will disagree. 
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    MairePoppyMairePoppy mod
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    In the old days, when the bride went right from her father's house to marriage, it was traditional for the brides parents to help the couple 'set up housekeeping.' It was considered rude for the parents to shirk their duties, by asking other people to purchase household items for the couple.

    In my circle it is typical for the moms to host a shower or at least provide the food for the party. I don't see anything wrong with the MOG throwing a shower. If your friend thinks it's rude, she is under no obligation to attend or send a gift.
                       
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    HobokensFuryHobokensFury member
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    I don't think that's true at all. I mean soon to be grandparents host baby showers all of the time so why can't parents host bridal showers?
     
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    SuMmErKuTiESuMmErKuTiE member
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    My mom threw my bridal shower with the help of my MOH and BM's. She ordered the invitations, booked the venue, and paid for the food. My MOH and BM's helped with the details and setting up and cleaning up.

    It's a lot to expect of girls usually just starting out on their own as well (if you have 20 something BM's) to carry the burden of throwing a bridal shower especially if it's at a country club or restaurant. So, usually the mother of the bride and/or groom is helping out behind the scenes if not stepping up as the actual host.

    The traditional rules are outdated, and to be honest the past 5 bridal showers I've been to have been thrown by the bride's mother, and one of them was at the mother of the bride's home. No one in our circle turned their nose up at it or thought it was rude.
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    janeashjaneash
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    My mom is throwing my bridal shower.  She is my MOH though so double duty for her!!  Also, my FMIL lives in Australia so it would be hard for her to throw me one over here.  I'm just grateful that someone wants to host a shower for me, because she was the only one to offer!  The shower isn't about the gifts for me anyways.....our registry is quite limited b/c FI and I have already lived together for 4 years so we don't need/want anything!  I just can't wait to spend time with close family and friends!  Any excuse for a party!

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