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September 2012 Weddings

BM Vent!! very long

sorry to bore you all with my problems but i just need to vent

i have a bridesmaid that was poorly chosen.. i had a few options and she wasn't at the top of my list but really wanted to hold the role, calling daily to ask if she could do it, and asking if i made my decision yet. she is the cousin of my MOH's bf and we have all hung out in the past several times and she seems like a sweet heart so i agreed to let her hold the position. she saw the MOH's dress (which is the same as the other BM) before she ever started asking to hold the position. so now come time to order her dress and i get a phone call asking if she could have a different dress because she has big boobs and doesn't want to wear a strapless dress. (i am large chested also and have a strapless dress)i told her no, that i wanted all dresses the same. she agreed and ordered her dress. her dress came in and needs alterations because it is too long (with her own seamstress), she says its done. i get another phone call asking if she can have straps put on her dress with the excess material from her previous alterations, because she doesnt want her dress to be strapless. i explained that i want all dresses to look the same. she agrees but then calls back to tell me she's having more alterations done to it because she needs to wear a bra. so to date i dont know if she went against me and is having straps put on... ugh!!!

i had everything planned with a hair stlyist for all of us for trials and the day of but her "SIL" is a stylist and will be more than happy to do our hair. so i put the first stylist on hold and had trials last night. we were all there to have our hair done, and they turned out horrible. i showed the BMs what i liked and asked if they all liked it or what they would do different. they all agreed and the stylist went to work. the do was nothing like the picture and just looked sloppy. all BM's except for problem BM went and then me... my hair looked HORRIBLE. it was a very crooked, half loose half tight sloppy upside down french braid that stopped at the crown of my head then another french braid that was totally pointless to meet the other pony tail from the first braid that was also off center. then she put a very small tight bun in the middle. i have long hair (below the bra line) and the bun was smaller than my fist. it was just horrible!!! i my veil would not even hook into my hair. i told her what i didnt like about it and the answer was it'll be different the day of, i promise... WTH?? isn't a trial to see what it is going to look like the day of?? 

as if the trials weren't already bad enough the problem BM tell the MOH she wants her hair to look different than everyone elses, i wasn't aware of this until i was talking to the MOH this morning. so no it's her turn to go, and the stylist "forgets what she's doing" and does something totally different. the problem asks if she can braid hre bangs instead of doing curls... WTH? 

i dont want this "sil" doing our hair, it was horrible and i know the one is going to be totally different

i have 2 weeks until the wedding and need to make sure the original stylist didn't schedule others (i dont blame her if she did) and have trials or find a new stylist all together.... ugh!! this is probably the most stress i have had to deal with with all the planning!! i wanna scream!!

Re: BM Vent!! very long

  • wow!!!! This BM of yours seems like I real hand full! I'm sorry you are dealing with this.  Based off your "phone convo" listed above, it seems to me that maybe shes having cups put into her dress?!  I would maybe politely call her and find out what alterations she has had done?

    If you specifically asked for all your girls to wear their hair the same, then I would insist upon it and also inform your stylist this as well (so she cant pull a fast one and ask them to do something different).

    If you really dont like how your hair came out with your BM "sil" I would get on the phone right away with your originally choice and see if she can get you in asap!  If not, try to find another salon, or someone who can come to you?!

    Good Luck!
  • Yikes!  That is horrible.  First of all, STOP appeasing this BM under ANY circumstance.  I would call her today and say you were not happy with your hair and you want to look perfect so you would really like to use your stylist (after confirming she's available).  Or, I'd flat our lie at this point and say you put a desposit down with the other stylist you "forgot" about and you don't want to lose your money.  Locate any other stylist but her SIL. 

    Since you have all your BM getting their hair done, are you paying for it?  If you are not, I hate to tell you but you really shouldn't dictate how they wear their hair.  If you are though, I think you can pull a bridezilla and say "this is the hair style my bridesmaids are wearing on my day since everyone agreed to it.  If you didn't like it, you should have spoke up so it is too late.  If I'm being too demanding you are welcome to just be a guest"  For things that you pay for, it is kinda a requirement IMO unless there is a drastic issue with it (i.e. the jewlery you buy them causes a skin reaction or her hair is super short and everyone else has updos).  If you go to the stylist you want she'll listen to what you say about the hair.  Bride with the checkbook wins.
  • Thanks so much! you guys are awesome!!

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