Snarky Brides

Chosing bridesmaids

I was just wondering what everyone's opinion is about having a bridesmaid who is not religious at a church wedding? Is it ok because they are just their to support you? Or, do they also need to support the spirituality of the marriage? ( The wedding is Catholic, I don't know if that makes a difference?)

Re: Chosing bridesmaids

  • I'm not religious, and I would be offended if a friend said I couldn't be a BM because the wedding was in a church and I don't believe in God so I can't be a part of her special day. Weddings aren't about the religion of the bride and groom, they're about celebrating the marriage of people close to you. So yes, they are there to support the bride, not the religion.

    At least, that's the way I see it. I've never been to the wedding of a super religious bride, so maybe they see if differently.
  • I'm Catholic.  Two of my bridesmaids are agnostic, and one is Protestant.  I never gave it a second thought.  They'll just abstain from Communion.  No big deal.
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  • I am having a catholic ceremony also and it really doesn't matter if the BM or GM for that matter are of the same religion. They are like you said suppoting you and the promises you are making to each other. the attendents won't really be participating in the religious aspects of the wedding anyways... my pastor said it was up to my guests adn attendents if they wanted to take communion or not. Besides that the only people who really know if they are not a specific religion is you them and GOD so dont worry and have the people standing up there because they support and love you not because of their religious practices!
  • My FI is catholic and Im Greek Orthodox and we are having a catholic ceremony.  So I could care less if my BM's are religious, lol.  I wouldnt worry about it.  Your wedding party is there to support both of you.  It doesnt matter what their religious beliefs are.

    Good Luck!
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  • I'm Catholic, DH is Greek Orthodox.  We had an Orthodox wedding.  Our WP was made up of BM and GM who were (in no particular order): Catholic, Greek Orthodox, Druze, Muslim, and Hindu.  If we had gotten married in my church the same people would have been in our WP.
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  • Brooke, looks like we have more in common than we thought.  Smile
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  • I'm confused as to how her religious preference makes any difference at all.
  • Looks like it :)
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  • As long as she is there to support you, I fail to see how her religious beliefs would come into play.
  • I know that she will support me, I just consider marriage to be a very spiritual event. You become one in the eyes of God. However, I believe you are all right and that the role of a bridesmaid is mainly to help out the bride and religion shouldn't affect that. Thanks for all the comments they really help :)
  • Yep, as long as she supports you in your spiritual commitment, then she is qualified. She doesn't have to make that spiritual commitment with you.
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  • I was in my brother's Catholic wedding, and even though I was baptized, my family knows I am not religious at all.  Also, my brother later made me his daughter's God mother, so I think if an atheist can be a god mother, she can be a bridesmaid too.
  • No no no no no!  I check with God.  He is NOT okay with it.  And I'm Catholic too, so I speak with some authority on the matter.
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  • I am a bridesmaid in my best friend's wedding in a few months, it'll be a grand Catholic affair and I am an atheist. It doesn't matter to her and despite what views I hold on religion I am commited to making her day great for her. That means that I will do my best to learn what will be expected of wedding party and when and that I will be respectful of her faith and the ceremony to the utmost.

    If your friend feels the same way, then I foresee no problems.

  • Sure, ask her to be a BM, but totally be prepared for God to strike the church with lighting during the ceremony. Homey don't play dat. 
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