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October 2012 Weddings

No glass clinking

FI is TOTALLY against guests clinking glasses to get us to kiss. He thinks its obnoxious and rude. I wonder how much people would actually do it (the weddings I've been to, it's been just a handful of times, before people get occupied with things like food and dance!). FI feels pretty strongly about putting a note on the table asking guests to please not clink glasses to get us to kiss. In the past, he's seen other couples have guests need to do something before we'll kiss (a whole table stand up and sing a song about love, for example). 

I'm not really keen on putting a note on the table, I think that's a little rude, too. Should it be a word of mouth thing that we won't want glasses clinked? Should it just be sucked up, for the few times it'll happen during the reception? Do you have any other ideas?

Thanks gang!

Re: No glass clinking

  • I think it's fine to just spread it word of mouth. If people DO clink glasses at the reception, just ignore it. Most people will get the hint that your not gonna kiss and they wot keep doing it.
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  • My suggestion would be to ignore it if it happens, and it won't happen again. If you're really worried and absolutely don't want it to happen I would maybe tell some friends/family that you're inviting that you really don't want that happening and maybe the word will spread. I agree that putting a note on the tables seems a little rude.
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  • I would not put a note thats beyond rude. If hes going to get that upset about it that its going to ruin his night after your seating chart is made tell 1 person from each table to let people know you guys prefer not to. I have never seen it happen more then a few times. If it does happy just ignore it they will get the hint but putting a note out is just rude. 

  • Yeah I think a note on the table is just going to bring it to people's attention and might even create more glass clinking than if you just left it alone.  I agree with PPs, just ignore it if it happens and people will get the hint.
  • Agreed...typically people will get the hint if you ignore it. In my family, if you put a note bringing it up, they would do it more just to be obnoxious.
  • Just have your DJ announce it if they don't get the hint after word of mouth. I've been at a few weddings where the guests did it once, then the DJ announced that from now on they had to play a game in order to get the Bride & Groom to kiss. It seemed to work well.
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  • A lot of venues don't want the glasses clinked since guests can get a bit aggressive sometimes and break the glasses. Have the DJ make an accouncement. Something like "If you want to see the newlyweds kiss, you need ot do XYZ. Please refrain from clinking on your glasses."

  • Is this really a big problem?  I don't mean that obnoxiously at all, it's just every wedding I've ever been to (and I've worked a ton of them) the glass clinking happens a couple times early on then people forget about it.

    The only ones that continue it seem to be the grooms friends, trying to tick off the groom for their own amusement.
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  • At my brother's wedding, they had the DJ (in his welcome) tell us that if we wanted the bride and groom to kiss, we would have to go up on the dance floor with our partner and demonstrate.

    It was really cute, especially as people started getting more creative with it. My parents went up and my dad dipped my mom back almost to the floor. My fiance and I went up and did the thing from the Addam's Family where he says "Oh, Tish!" and kisses all the way up her arm.

    Super cute -- especially when the old folks start getting into it. :)
  • When shopping at Michaels I ran across the little silver bell placecard holders that have a little note about ringing the bell to see the bride and groom kiss.  I thought they would be cute for the reception but my FI said NO WAY!!  He said he was not kissing on command for the guests.  If people start clinking glasses at our reception we will just ignore it.   It wouldnt bother me, seems kind of fun, but FI thinks people would be obnoxious about it.
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